My husband has mentioned experiencing that a couple of times. I think the proper response to that is to look at what he just did to your hand, look at him, and say “What the hell is wrong with you?”
Oh, as for the European kissing thing, it’ll never go over in Canada. We’re reserved, cool folk, you know. I think we should all just start bowing instead of handshaking - might cut down on colds and flus.
In Tim Green’s The Dark Side of the Game, he explains how to shake hands with an NFL player. These big strong guys do so much weightlifting and bashing each other around that their hands hurt terribly all through the season. Shake hands with them very gently.