Insert Miscellaneous Line From TV Infomercial Here

“With the money you save on the first 30 pounds of beef jerky, the machine pays for itself.”

But wait! There’s more!

This week, a free set of Ginsu knives!

Your bed invites your guests - to leave!

Egg salad here - but where’s the shell? Amazing.

But that’s not all!

How much would you expect to pay for something like this?

“Not one hundred and fifty dollars, not one hundred and twenty dollars. Not one hundred and ten, one hundred, ninety, eighty, seventy, or even sixty dollars like you might all be thinking. Right now, if you promise to tell a friend so we can get some word of mouth advertising, all you’ll pay is just four easy credit card payments of just $39.95”

Operators are standing by. No CODs.


Call within the next ten minutes and receive FREE as a BONUS GIFT…

Think this ice will jam it?

Rap-tou soon ‘crushes’ that idea!

and it really really works!!

Set it and … FORGET IT!

Use it on tablecloths, upholstery, carpet, even Grandma’s antique lace!

P.S. NutMagnet, you suck. That’s what I was going to post.

But I don’t have the time?

How often does this happen to you?
OH Yeah I love this one - " Why not get two, one for the house and one for the boat?"

I know it’s not magic-- it must be science!

This one stuck me as so incredibly stupid, I started a Pit thread about it.

And it looks exactly like your own, natural hair!

And boy, does it catch fish!

“And it’s great for RVs!”

(For some reason, almost every infomercial ever made has to point out that their product works for/in RVs, even if the product has nothing to do with them. “And these steak knives are so sharp, they can be stored in your RV!”)

It slices, it dices, it does julienne fries!!!

Available for 3 low payments of $19.95. But if you call in the next 10 minutes, we’ll CUT OFF 2 whole payments!