Is anyone else having this problem with cockroaches

Years ago I dated a guy who lived in an apartment with a roach problem.

We’d take bets on which ones climbing the wall would get to the ceiling first.
It’s also where I got into the habit of putting the lid back onto whatever I am drinking before I set it down.

I hated going to his place, it’s a wonder I never brought any home with me.

When I had roaches, the cat ate one and never did it again. Maybe they taste bad.

Get a gecko. They’re supposed to love roaches.

I see what you did there.

NO.
It’s not that bad people. Actually they just did some demo in the basement of my building and that seems to have driven them upstairs. The problem is this old building is like a sieve. I’ve been plugging entry ways. Goddamn “dumbwaiter” that isn’t used by the people anymore is a roach haven. They’re almost all gone people. I don’t live with thousands of roaches.

Lol. I figured all of this was simply a humorous take on a recent problem. How could anyone think you were being serious? Really??

Maybe you have Germans?

It can take years to get rid of them. I think I had to call some Russian exterminators.

I think I’ll need a combination of Russian, British, French and then American ones.

You really need to read “The Roaches”, a 1965 story by Thomas Disch included in his anthology “Fun With Your New Head.”

Trust me on this.