is gray hair less attractive?

Sure. And if I had more hair on my steadily receding hair line I wouldn’t care if it was gray. But my beard has turned gray and I look really old. And if any stubble shows I look like an old wino. I think gray hair can look good on women, but only in something pretty simple. A fancy do in gray is kind of incongruous.

And OP: An awful lot of women dye their hair because it’s gray. My wife let me know about this. I wouldn’t have had any idea on my own that any women who weren’t grandmas would have gray hair.

A wig is a costume. Do you really want to wear a costume every day?

I’ve decided to let my gray go, and I’m only 42. It’s a pretty silver, and I kind of like it.

The idea that gray hair looks “unprofessional” is nonsense. A good cut and non-froufy styling is the key too looking professional, no matter what color your hair is. As to whether it’s attractive; it is to some people and it isn’t to others, kinda like every other physical attribute you possess.

I’ll reiterate what j666 said, that convincingly covering gray is best done by a professional. Regularly. VERY regularly. It’s expensive and time-consuming. Please don’t think that you’re fooling anyone with the boxed stuff, which over time inevitably leaves you with either an orange or purple halo when the light hits you.

Ultimately, decide how YOU feel about it, and go with that.

I think Sec’y Sebelius is totally boink worthy. But I recognize that mine may be a minority opinion.

I’m sick of the bullshit that says we all need to look young.

There’s nothing wrong with growing old. I’ll look how I look for my age and fuck you if you don’t like it. People age; we all age, and the misconception that there’s something wrong with that is troubling.

Grow old. Go gray. Get wrinkles.

Fuck the media advertising assholes who’ve reinforced for decades there’s something wrong with this natural progression.

This is how my late boyfriend’s hair was and I think it was damn sexy.

Yeah, I’m 38 and I’ve quit coloring my hair (used to be highlighted, then corrective coloring) specifically because it’s started coming in gray and I love it! If someone isn’t going to respect me because of that, then the hell with them.

Well somebody’s got a bee in her bonnet…
I’ll tell you what’s wrong with growing old: 1) Looking older than you feel, and 2) feeling like shit.
IMHO, women look better without gray hair. Just as important, though, is looking fit and healthy, not fat and broken down and styless and frumpy. You can be fit, healthy, and stylin’ with gray hair, but it is one piece of the puzzle.
I used to dye my hair, but now I have so little left it’s not worth the bother. So just be thankful you’re not bald.

It’s not a misconception; getting old is unhealthy, and of course fatal in the end. The fact that we can’t do much about it yet doesn’t make aging a good thing.

Good thing? I think aging is a marvellous thing, for a number of reasons!

Such as? I’d far prefer biological immortality. Human lifespans are pathetically short. And even if we can’t extend our lifespan, I’d prefer being young and healthy until the end then dropping dead rather than slowly decaying.

I was watching NCIS the other night. Both Mark Harmon and Jamie Lee Curtis have grey hair, and both of them look fantastic.

Meh, I started going grey at 35. I went the grecians route for half a year then realized. Fuck it, I’m not going to win this battle.

Nobody gets “gray” hair. Proliferation of white hairs mixed with black gives a gray effect until it turns silver; many of those looks are lovely. White hairs among light brown–like mine–give a grim beige effect. So I’ve been using various shades of henna for years. (Not fire engine red.) And the colors suit my complexion just fine. (Some “silver” hair has been bleached–which is definitely rough on the hair.)

Suit yourself. What do you see when you look in a mirror? Check out the toxicity of various hair colors. They are usually safe for the customer, unless she’s pregnant. The colorist is the one who might have problems–ask him. Or her…

Ah, Leaffan. Thanks for that. I feel the same way. I’m forty-two, with just a handful of silver in my brown hair at this point, but I plan to go natural all the way. I’ve dyed my hair and it’s no fun. Besides,

this kind of bugs me.

I started getting gray hairs when I was 18. I had some nice looking gray hair even when I met my wife.

If someone is going to reject you because of the color of your hair, you’re better off with someone else.

I think you should dye. It will make you younger. Younger means more attractive and powerful.

When I died my hair, a few years ago, I looked younger, felt younger, etc… (I can’t find a natural looking dye now, so I quit). Now, people ignore me out of the gate. Who wants to listen to an old person? Who even wants to look at one?
Put on the dye. There are more toxins going into your lungs right now through the air you breathe than will get there via hair dye.

I think somebody has a case of the Mondays!

The problem is not your hair, it’s the people you hang out with.

All the dudes pitching in about how you’re still a decent catch and credible in the workplace, despite your gray hair? Your experience will not be mirrored by a woman who goes gray. This is a huge double-standard, but there’s nothing we can do to change it. Like I said above, age discrimination is a *big *problem in the workplace, and much moreso for women than men. A woman who looks old will treated like an old person. She will take an involuntary hit to her credibility. People will assume that she’s losing things like her hearing, her vision, her mental acuity, and her health. She may be sidearmed into early retirement. Yeah it’s unethical and illegal, but that doesn’t stop it from happening.

That’s not to say that the OP shouldn’t do what she wants. But she should go into this decision with her eyes open. There are consequences to every choice, and a woman who chooses not to cover her gray WILL be treated like an old(er) woman. Sugarcoating this with your own experiences (“I have gray hair and I’m fine!”) is not applicable because women and men don’t have the same experiences wrt hair color. Men can lose their hair and it’s okay. Men can go gray and it’s okay. Working women are expected to rock the same shiny mane at age 70 as we had at age 10. And although we can buck that expectation, it’s not without consequence.

There are other herbal dyes than henna. www.hennaforhair.com offers Cassia obovata (blond) and indigo (blue-black), and there’s a great deal of documenation on how to achieve different colors, including dying gray hair. You can, for instance, add indigo to henna to get a cooler brown.

Me? I’ve been using henna on my hair for a couple of years now. It’s not so much that I mind the gray - I’ve been going gray for fifteen years now - it’s that I’m in this awkward half-and-half stage that looks washed out. Henna changes my color from an anemic gray-brown to a robust chestnut with copper highlights. It doesn’t fade. It smells good. And they dye doesn’t harm the hair follicles.

It totally depends on the person. Anderson cooper is sexy as hell with grey hair. On me, I hate grey. If you do color, do it because it’s what you want not for anyone else.