This. I don’t know what industry Rachelellogram works in, but apparently it’s very appearance and or youth-oriented. If you work in a similar industry, then going gray could indeed be problematic.
I’ve spent the past ten years in investment management and academia, and my experience is that most women in those fields do not dye their hair. Their assistants do, though.
Odds are that your experience will fall somewhere in between being disregarded either because you aged or because you display some small vanity. I think ultimately whether you decide to color or to go gray, the important thing is to do it right. If you color, get it done correctly. If you decide to go gray, then get a fantastic cut so that your hair says “I embrace this silver.” and not “I have ceased to give a shit.”
It bums me out that we’re not getting many wig anecdotes in here, because that’s an option I’d seriously consider if my hair started looking bad. I remember seeing a photo of a celebrity who was 70 and looked about 40, and when I read about how she stayed looking so young, she mentioned that she wore wigs and even had her own brand of wigs, similar to how younger celebrities have clothing lines. Anyone know who I’m talking about? I can’t remember her name.
Anyways, the advantage to wearing a wig is that hair dye just takes care of your “color issues,” but a wig will also mask thinning hair, which is a frequent problem for older women.
I live in a town where there is a strong emphaisi on being “natural”, so a vast number of older women have gone gray. Some, who have good cuts and dress well, and have silver, white, or light grey hair, look good. Some who have poor cuts, still dress hippie-style when 60 and older, or have old dishwater or battleship grey, look awful.
This is an academic town, and I agree with DianaG, that women in academia don’t color as much as those in other fields. If you have tenure, it doesn’t affect employment, and may help you be perceived as more serious and intellectual.
Whatever you choose to do, do choose a color similar to what it was when you were you, so that it goes with your skin tone, and keep it maintained. I’ve seen some people go blonde who were dark when young, because they think the blond will conceal the grey roots as they grow out. Nope. Doesn’t work. It’s made some I know look older, because it makes their skin tone look sallow and jaundiced. And it still shows when it grows out. Another friend, who colors to her lovely youthful dark color, doesn’t get her roots touched up often enough, and that looks bad, too.
But I saw a woman in the airport yesterday who was a great model for aging. From her face, I’d guess her at over 70. But her figure was great, she walked and moved like a healthy, confident young person, her grey hair was beautifully cut and she wore her clothes well. That, I thought, that’s the way I want to age.