Is it possible for a person to never fart?

A friend of mine claims she never farts. My other friends and I don’t believe her. So, my question is, is it possible for a human being to never fart?

No.

Only until they fall asleep.

with a tight enough cork, yes.

everyone average about 1 qt. or L per day no matter if it leaks or blasts out. she is a leaker with a relaxed sphincter.

girls don’t fart they poot.

Ask her to prove it. Have her eat a big meal including beans, cabbage, and onions. Then have someone keep watch after she goes to sleep, with a microphone to documentation.

Bet big money on it. :smiley:

Despite its name, it’s always Smartfood (cheddar popcorn in the black bag) that does it for me. Add some of that to **Colibiri’**s diet.

And yeah. No. It’s not possible. She’s just one of those girls.

They don’t call us human beans for nuthin’. She’s got the same fauna and flora in her gut as everyone else so heck yeah she farts. Maybe not as much, but then that’s her loss now, isn’t it?

Females do not fart. Well, my mother and wife do, but no other female does.

No, not possible, BUTT, I’m pretty sure not everyone farts in equal amounts. I’ve noticed as I get older I fart more. When I was younger, say 10 - 25, I hardly ever farted (while I was awake, at least - not sure what was going on while I was asleep), but now I’m in my forties I fart several times a day (and who knows how much while I sleep?). That would have been unthinkable to my younger self who went weeks (months?) without letting one rip.

My metabolism has slowed and I wonder if that’s what causes it?

She probably thinks her shit don’t stink, too.

ROFLMAO! I haven’t heard that in decades!

(For the rest of you: it’s from an ancient Richard Pryor comedy album, in which he had a whole section about farting.)

More room out than in, she’s gotta let it out somewhere sometime!

Why deny yourself the joy of a good fart?

Sounds like one for the Mythbusters. They’ve taken on flatulence myths in the past.

It’s certainly not possible never to fart. But it is possible never to exult in it.

Denial is an amazing force. If we could bottle and sell it, the economic crisis would be over. Only, of course, we don’t need to, because people seem to generate it endlessly on their own.

Everyone with an intestine farts. Unless she’s on TPN (total parenteral nutrition), she has an intestine to absorb her nutrients. Therefore, she farts.

If she’s truly under the impression that she *never *farts, I’d seriously consider examining her for some sort of neural or muscular deficit related to her ass. I guess it’s possible that she’s got so little tone in her anal sphincter that she can’t feel gas passing, but that would cause some other conditions (like uncontrollable feces) that I would think she’d be aware of.

Let me say it again: everyone with intestines farts. It’s the second thing we’re waiting for after surgery. First is bowel sounds, then gas, then poop…although that last one might not happen in a short hospital stay. But if you haven’t passed gas, you’re probably not going home, because it’s an indication that something ain’t right.

Despite its name? That trademark was invented by the Reverend Spooner himself!

Just an example of what ‘retained gas’ can do to ya: I had a patient come through X-ray once with extreme shortness-of-breath and she was panting/gasping just to keep from going blue(r), trust me. She’d had some type of minor rectal surgery a week or so before, but all was well to that point. She did not tell anyone she had not pooped and/or farted since surgery, of course. She literally looked pregnant - I was first one to actually lay eyes on her at hospital, fwiw, in defense of the Doc saying it was an asthma attack, hence the Chest film).

I took the PA Chest film and looked at it, and her colon (whole thing) was HUGE - displaced most everything in her belly and pushed her diaphragm/lungs upwards to point where she could not really inhale. Doc said the depressurization, through a little barium-enema tip inserted ‘manually’, took a looooong time. Stunk up quite a bit of first-floor of that side of hospital, too. I just can’t imagine the pSi present in that colon.

If you did not fart, at some point, it’d get problematic (probably) :slight_smile:

The Colibiri diet…

bet you never thought that you’d have the most flatulent diet on the planet named after you…

It may be possible that she only expells gas when she defecates. Said emmissions may not, under some systems of gaseous taxonomy, be considered farts per se.

What would you consider them… propellant?