Yeah, same here. There’s only so long you can soak in the decorative can of Hamm’s stapled to the wall and the chandelier made of nude Barbie dolls before you end up eavesdropping.
I’m not a people person (much like Randall, I hate people but I love gatherings) so my solo bar excursions tend to be boring, but some have been fun. Some drunk guys at the Tap in Boston bought me a drink and probably would’ve kept doing so had I not needed to leave early.
At the Publick House, just outside Boston, I was just sitting at the bar, looking around at the bar and just in general, when the guy to my right turns to me and haughtily asks, “Can I help you with something?” Uh, sorry, dude, for daring to look through your airspace.
But anyway, going to a bar alone can be fun, especially if it’s one you intend to be a regular at. Some weekends when my friends are tired and go home early, I’ll stop by my local bar on the way home, and there’s usually someone there I know.
If you are doing this to meet people, I’d suggest trying to break the ice with a largish mixed group of men and women, coworkers or a sports team or something.
I second the suggestion to make friends with the bartender; he or she is someone you can chat up if things aren’t busy, and you can ask him/her to watch your drink when you go to the loo.
Personally, I don’t go to bars alone much. I’ll go if it’s quiet, but I feel too self-conscious if it’s busy, like there’s a lot of people bringing business and I’m just taking up space. And being in a really busy social place alone can make me feel lonely, so I don’t enjoy it. Plus there’s the whole “staring in to space” aspect already touched on. I’m much more comfortable in a restuarant alone (I bring a book) or at a movie alone (I watch the movie, obviously).
I like a nice pub, and I like to watch football, so sometimes I’ll go park on a barstool on a Sunday afternoon and have a couple beers. If it’s just me, the bartender, and a couple old guys, I’m pretty comfortable with that.
I used to go to bars solo all the time. When traveling for work I was never at a loss for how to spend my time - could always find a bar to while away as long as I wished. Never had a problem striking up conversation if that’s what I wanted to do, or minding my own business if that was the day’s mood.
Of course, IME spending alot of time in bars tended to correlate with drinking a whole hell of a lot.
Other alternatives would be coffeehouses or bookstores. But if you want to go to a bar, go ahead.
Figure out ahead of time how you intend to deal with unwanted attention. IMO, it isn’t quite right for a single woman in a bar to get all pissy when a guy tries to strike up conversation. But the single woman certainly shouldn’t feel forced to engage in a conversation she doesn’t desire.
Nothing weird about it at all to me. I used to meet women alone in bars all they time, and generally they were very friendly. Occassionally, profoundly friendly.
I was on a business trip once, staying in a nice hotel, in a city where I didn’t know a soul.
The hotel had a fun looking sports pub, with lots of respectable looking (and hot!) guys hanging out there … I pondered going in and ordering a drink and maybe an appy, just to see what would happen.
But I chickened out, went to my room, changed into my jammies and had room service. I kicked myself the whole evening and the next day for being such a wimp.