“Faster, faster, you fool, you fool!!”
“Does he bite?”
“No, but he’ll gore the hell out of you.”
“Can’t see. Better light a match…”
Mom owned pretty much all his albums. Even Sings, which she picked up by mistake.
“Nnn, nn-nn-nn-nn-neh…”
“Come on out…
Fat Albert!”
"The speedometer starts at zero…goes all the way up around to 200 MPH…and after the 200 there’s still more room, and the words “OH WOW…”
“We called him Old Weird Harold because he was six feet tall, weighed fifty pounds. We used to use him to get the football out of the sewer.”
Thirty kids in the class–we had 23 papers come back with Ronald’s name on them!"
[After taking Midol as a painkiller] “Fellas, there’s nothing wrong with me, my voice is no higher than it used to be, no, it’s the truth! Of course, every 28 days I get irritable…!”