I did some digging, and found the pdf of the article. I can’t give a link, but you can find it easily if you have a subscription to PsychInfo/PsychArticles.
Onomatopoeia, it is considered a Peer-Reviewed empirical study.
The study found an interaction between religious belief and marital satisfaction, meaning that religion only had an effect at some levels. In couples who were either unsatisfied or moderately happy with the marriage, there was little or no significant effect on infidelity for religious beliefs, while the effect was strong in happy marriages. And as one would expect, unhappy marriages have higher chances of cheating.
The authors’ conclusions: “It may be that in happy marriages, religious values can bolster one’s commitment to the primary relationship. However, when the primary relationship is less than ideal, the dissatisfaction with the relationship may ‘override’ religious values” (746). They go on to say that contrary to religious institutions’ beliefs, religion does not protect marriage. They also say that church should NOT be a substitute for improving marital satisfaction.
So here, while there might be ideological bias, it seems less likely that the authors are conducting shoddy research. It is much more likely that the NHMRC is simplifying the research to fit their own conclusions, or simply didn’t read beyond the abstract.
More pertinent to the OP, they found other things which correspond with increased infidelity, according to this study.
[ol]
[li]They also found increased infidelity corresponds with higher education levels.[/li][li]Marrying when young has increased cheating. It seems to stabilize around 30 years old.[/li][li]Females have the highest rates at around the 40 year old cohort, while males at around 60 years old.[/li][/ol]
Religious or not, people who attend church services more than once a week are probably strongly involved in their community and well known to a lot of people, and thus are less likely to attempt to cheat. I imagine that social factor is more important than religious beliefs in that statistic.
I don’t think religion has any impact on cheating. But this is only my opinion. Jesse Jackson. Bill Clinton (attended church weekly, right?). MLK possibly. Anyway, am enjoying this site, but still curious about the stats on re-cheating.
The first reply to your post had a bunch of statistics on cheating that you could use. You should be able to get a rough estimate of the odds she will cheat on you based on your economic status, education level, age when you got married, how often you attend church, and whether you have discussed divorce before. What more do you want?
I’m really having trouble finding any good statistics. (Has anyone else stumbled on the NARTH site? Holy Shit!)
Anyway, Chronos’ comment led me on a search looking for information for a TV show I saw recently about how it benefits a species for the females to cheat and for the males to look the other way.
I found one study, no statistics though, that seemed to indicate that ‘cheating’ would be less likely to lead to divorce or seperation in cases where the other [man in this case] was genetically similar.
Anyway, my point is: obviously a person can only cheat on their next partner if there is a next partner. A lot of infidelity does not lead to divorce. (Hilary?)
Once a cheater, always a cheater. Once an enabler, always an enabler?
The statistics in the page cited have footnotes, and the sources do not appear to be inherently religious. As I mentioned above, the fact that people who attend church on a regular basis are statistically less likely to cheat doesn’t mean that it’s the religion that’s the cause. I’ve known plenty of people who attended church regularly who were not religious, I continue to go to church regularly (though not more than once a week) for social reasons despite my being agnostic since I was about 10. People who go to church regularly have a larger support network to help them when they are experiencing marital problems, and they are going to be in contact with people who will be more likely to discourage infidelity.
Since you seem to have a deep prejudice against religion, you could just take all the statistics from that page and disregard the church-going one, though I do feel it’s probably relevant. Only one of the factors listed had anything to do with religion, and it had nothing to do with faith, just the frequency with which you attend church.
Once again, everything I am being provided is super helpful, so I want noone to think I am not appreciative. I accept on insight from everyone, but I was specifically looking for the chances (although I know statistics sometimes mean nothing) of a person cheating if they have cheated before. For example: 83% of those who have cheated are likely to cheat again, or something along those lines.
I decided to give my honest opinion based on what I know. I think FormerMarineGuy’s wife is probably going to cheat on him during the course of the marriage - I’d say the odds approach 85%.
Factors:
Both participants in the marriage have indulged in adultery before.
His wife is dishonest, as she did not reveal to him her past infidelities until after they were married.
The OP is a former marine, and this is a large part of his perceived identity, based on his handle. Since he is no longer a marine, he either lacked the dedication to remain in the service and bailed as soon as he could, indicating a lack of devotion that women find unattractive, or he suffered some injury or health problem that forced him to leave, and women prefer healthy males.
The OP seems to have a low intelligence, making it easier for someone to cheat on him.
His posts indicate that his wife is a Latina and he is a non-Latino, and that he believes such differences are relevant in this discussion. Mixed-race marriages that include at least one racist are statistically less likely to last.
Maybe they’re MORE likely to cheat because you meet local people there, and church is so boring that you just want to get out of there and have some fun!
(I sound like I speak from experience, but I’ve only been to church like 5 times in my whole life, and no I didn’t hook up with anyone from there. :D)
Almost every church I’ve attended for any period of time had a cheating couple everyone knew about; usually it was w/ a church staff member. Church is often where people seek to improve and/or release an emotional burden. Someone other than your spouse comforts or guides you…if they’re the opposite sex it’s a recipe for cheating. Plus, if they’re Christians, they can blame their behavoir on the Devil or something.
I have to admit that I agree w/ a partof Blanche’s argument, you’ve both cheated, and consider it to have been cheating. I had a boyfriend before my divorce was final but my husband had moved out 8 months prior and the divorce papers were filed- was I cheating? I don’t think so, but others would argue the technicality. (And interestingly, according to the bible, every time I have sex until my first husband dies I’ll be cheating. I can feel the flames licking my feet already!) Were you both still ‘with’ your spouses? Do you think back and see your actions as ‘wrong’, and see the devastation they wrought? If the latter is true, I think you’re both less likely to cheat.
As far as the infidelity goes, you’re looking for objectivity in a very subjective matter. There are so many variables that go into play, and so many unknowns to us, that it’d be impossible for anyone to offer you anything more than a WAG.
If she’s going to cheat, there’s really nothing you can do about it. Trust in her to stay faithful and quit worrying about it. Treat her right, and be faithful yourself. Then let the chips fall where they may.
I don’t think there’s a cut-and-dried answer to that question but I do think there are some guidelines you can rely on:
If your marriage becomes unhappy, she’s going to cheat on you. That should be a no-brainer.
If this is kicking around in your mind then you might be giving off a suspicious vibe over her present behavior or a judgemental vibe over the past behavior. These aren’t features of a happy marriage.
People tend to follow patterns in who they choose and what happens in relationships. Maybe she’s likely to be “unhappy” with anybody she chooses, or maybe she gets bored and then justifies her need for excitement by becoming “unhappy.”
FWIW, in my experience, in women-speak the term “unhappy” is supposed to sound like “abused” or “neglected” but it really means “bored” or “unsatisfied”.