We’ve recently added a kitten to our two-cat, three-rat household. The two adult cats (informally known as Miss Priss and The Boy) have been raised together and don’t seem to have a real “top cat” between them. I just can’t figure out the weird behavior between either of them and the kitten, Magnus (Mag).
Here’s an example: Mag and The Boy spot each other from opposite ends of the hall. There is a sizing-up stare. (Mag: approximately 18-20 ounces of fluff and cuteness. The Boy: approximately 17 pounds of muscled sloth.) The Boy crouches down, Mag flattens out, wiggle-butts, and then starts a charge. Halfway through the charge, he fluffs up ALL his fur (can’t be a scary 18 ounces of fluff if you’re not fluffed up, I guess) and starts hopping SIDEWAYS toward the other cat! Hop, hop, hop! Ffft, ffft, ffft!
He reaches the penultimate goal, approximately 3" from The Boy’s whiskers, at which point The Boy reaches out a paw, gently whaps him on the head, and then they BOTH turn and flee.
So what’s up with The Boy? Is he, as I always expected, just a great big softie? Is he growing attached to the little kitten and doesn’t want to hurt him? Or is he afraid that if he uses any kind of force, that huge fierce ball of fluff will take him apart? How is the kitten doing that to him?
Anybody got any insight into my cat’s brain, or is it just an empty lima bean, as I’ve always suspected?
Corr
Kittens of course know no fear. Now, put yourself in The Boy’s place. You’re faced with a charging (small) creature that is obviously completely out of its mind.
I think he’s just being careful. I mean, if you were outside and a squirrel or something ran straight for you, you’d probably try to get away too.
Well, I can tell you about that sideways thing: he’s doing the Crab Walk. Yes, all kittens, for a short time, believe themselves to be Ferocious Crabs From The Deep.
As for The Boy, he’s probably forgotten that he himself was once A Ferocious Crab and is bewildered as to why a small and furry Crab came to be in his home. I think the batting and running is a sign of “getting to know you.” Just wait until the grown-ups start cuddling with Mag - the CUTEST thing.
It’s an evil ploy that these cat’s have used to divert your attention to the real crime taling place. Ask your self, where was Miss Priss during this time? Huh? The other two distracted you long enough for her to…hmmmmmmm, what was she doing?
I have consulted my three cats on your behalf. Here are their answers:
QueenBitchKitty: Magnus is but a child, and like all children he is testing the limits of the adults in his life. The Boy will be fine – he knows that Magnus is too small to worry about, but must occasionally exert his authority gently but firmly.
BadBoyKittyWithAToupee: Foolish human. The “turn and run” part of this exercise is the fun part. All the better to run into one another “accidentally” again. And by the way, part three of this exercise is called “the dignity wash” and it is a requirement.
<<As for The Boy, he’s probably forgotten that he himself was once A Ferocious Crab and is bewildered as to why a small and furry Crab came to be in his home. >>
Oooh, that sounds about right…although my cat’s density is such that he’s normally bewildered by the fact that you STILL can’t walk through windows…Mag, on the other hand, may grow up to build a device to take over the world (or to do the dirty work for the rats, since they’re in a cage).
Ferocious Crab. It’s not quite a band name, but I like it.
Our cats and the neighbours cat used to have a strange hierarchy of terror running. My big black tom cat Pushkin (who induced genuine fear in small children from the neighbour that my sis was babysitting) was absolutely scared crapless of my neighbours cat who was average sized and of moderately bad temperament. The neighbours cat was then in turn terroized by our smallest cat, Starvin Marvin who did hold the record for the world most ridiculous looking cat, literally pint sized with a big belly and stubby legs, I don’t know how he scared the other two but he did!
The scene:
A moderately large room in a townhouse in Northern Florida. A large, atavistic black Tomcat (aka DemonKitty) sits comfortabley in front of the sliding glass doors. A small grey mackerel tabby Queen (aka PrettyKitty) sits on the couch, alternately sucking up to SittingHuman and growling at the Tom.
Enter the other human (me) with a box. The box wiggles and makes kitten noises.
GreyQueen: Hisses, flattens ears, backs into SittingHuman’s lap.
BlackTom: Huh?
Me: Dump box over on floor. Out tumble young FormalKitty and BadHairKitty.
GreyQueen: Growl with hair-raising viciousness.
BlackTom: Huh?
FormalKitty and BadHairKitty look around, tackle each other, and begin to roll accross the floor.
<several minute of cuteness>
BadHairKitty decides to climb SittingHuman’s leg (SittingHuman freezes in paralyzed pain), and sniffs noses with the GreyQueen, who promptly bats BadHairKitty back off the couch, then victoriously flees the scene in a dematerialzing GreyBlur[sup]tm[/sup].
…Meanwhile…
FormalKitty has seen BlackTom, and sneaks up on him by using the subtle “I’m An Invisible Bouncing Ball Of Cute” tactic, and pounces on BlackTom’s head. BlackTom instantly morphs into DemonKitty, and swats FormalKitty across the floor with several swiftly placed blows, hissing like a busted radiator. FormalKitty picks himself up and tries a variation of “Bouncing Ball of Cute”, the “Ferocious Bouncing Ball Of Cute”, and bounces back to the attack. DemonKitty swells to three times his (already impressive) normal size, and disappears in a BlackPuff[sup]tm[/sup].
FormalKitty and BadHairKitty resume tumbling across the floor…
This went on for about six weeks, until GreyQueen and BlackTom came to an understanding with the intruders: It’s all fun and games until I get bored, then, I sit on you. Years later, that still stands, although GreyQueen is no longer with us, and the “Bouncing Ball Of Cute” only shows up now and again.
LifeOnWry, you are quickly becoming one of my favorite posters.
I consulted with my cat, Beru “Da Squid” Kittycat, and she informed me that The Boy’s actions were essentially to let Mag know that, even though The Boy is older, he still runs the show, and isn’t about to be replaced by any two-bit little ragtop that comes down the pike. So, when Mag runs up to him, The Boy pops him one to show him that he’s not intimidated. Beru says this is SKOP (standard kitty operating procedure). She then licked my hand, and bit me. Just to keep me in line.
