Is There a "Standard" Turd?

[drastic_quench]

@corkboard

I saw a documentary about a toilet manufacturing facility once. They use a number of objects to test the flushing success of a toilet, from golf balls, to soaked wads of paper, to a biodegradable dough-like concoction that is meant to simulate, well, a turd. It’s not just one thing, but a whole range of them.

Phew, I feel better about my golf ball / cookie dough diet.

I was concerned, you see. But it too will pass.

[Blaster_Master]

@corkboard

I saw a documentary about a toilet manufacturing facility once. They use a number of objects to test the flushing success of a toilet, from golf balls, to soaked wads of paper, to a biodegradable dough-like concoction that is meant to simulate, well, a turd. It’s not just one thing, but a whole range of them.

@GaryM

Watched a show about how toilets are made, maybe on History Channel, and the manufacturer used bean paste sealed in condoms for testing.

I’m pretty sure it was an episode of Modern Marvels you all are refering to, try looking up episodes named Toilet Tech and/or Bathroom Tech. From a quick Google search, it looks like you can find clips of it on History Channel’s website and on Youtube.

I haven’t seen that episode in a while, but they did have someone on there who demonstrated different models and their flushing capacity. He mentioned using some kind of paste and how it compares to the average human waste in terms of consistency and mass and all.

[Kevbo]

I recall a magazine doing testing on various low-flow toilets. Possibly Consumer Reports. In that case Corn Flakes were used as the test medium. The toilets were compared as to how many cups of water soaked cornflakes they could reliably flush.

[Fubaya]

@Floater

I was once taken aside by an English friend who asked if I knew what my name means in his cultural circles (I do). :eek: He also told me that he had seen a cross section of a toilet where you could follow a turd through the mechanism. When it came out a robot arm lifted it up and placed in the bowl again.

In the old days before robots, was there a human turdwrangler that handled this job?

[cwthree]

@Kevbo

I recall a magazine doing testing on various low-flow toilets. Possibly Consumer Reports. In that case Corn Flakes were used as the test medium. The toilets were compared as to how many cups of water soaked cornflakes they could reliably flush.

I recall an earlier Consumer Reports review in which cooked oatmeal was mentioned as one of items used to test flushing capability.

[Gedd]

@mlees

We don’t 'cotton to no Metric stuff 'round here… we’ll stick with the American Long Ton, thank you very much.

Don’t you mean the American Long Turd?

[Enginerd]

@GaryM

Watched a show about how toilets are made, maybe on History Channel, and the manufacturer used bean paste sealed in condoms for testing.

The Gates Foundation uses soybean paste as well.

[cornflakes]

@Kevbo

I recall a magazine doing testing on various low-flow toilets. Possibly Consumer Reports. In that case Corn Flakes were used as the test medium. The toilets were compared as to how many cups of water soaked cornflakes they could reliably flush.

For the record, I do NOT appprove of this.

[KarlGauss]

Well, here is a page on stools with (and I kid you not) “the standard Plopp”! Of course, there is always the mini Plopp, too.

[TreacherousCretin]

@Fubaya

In the old days before robots, was there a human turdwrangler that handled this job?

FYI, according to a friend of mine who worked at the San Diego sewage processing facility, they prefer to be called “turdherders.”

[Jake]

@cwthree

I recall an earlier Consumer Reports review in which cooked oatmeal was mentioned as one of items used to test flushing capability.

And Rice Crispies.
Crap, Snackle, and Plop.

OK, I’m leaving now…

[Max_Torque]

Since there is a standard kilogram, there should also be a standard turd. I propose the Lloyd’s Bank Turd. I understand it’s nine inches long and weighs half a pound.

[KarlGauss]

Well, here is a page on stools with (and I kid you not) “the standard Plopp”! Of course, there is always the mini Plopp, too.

(Oops. Forgot the link earlier).

[ftg]

Dave Barry on standardized “floaters” and “sinkers”.

Heed the warning at the beginning of the column.

[md2000]

**Q: Is There a “Standard” Turd? **

A: Yes, but, political jokes are not allowed in this forum.

[Saint_Cad]

If you’re in Europe, it would be the EFSMI. I believe they are the de facto worldwide certification body as IIRC there was a guy out here in Colorado that had his certified by them.

[Blind_Guardian]

The Maximum Performance (MaP) Test is a common test of a toilet’s bulk flushing power, and they use soybean paste in 350g increments as a human waste analog. Their site goes into detail on their testing protocols.

[Thudlow_Boink]

@Floater

I was once taken aside by an English friend who asked if I knew what my name means in his cultural circles (I do). :eek: He also told me that he had seen a cross section of a toilet where you could follow a turd through the mechanism. When it came out a robot arm lifted it up and placed in the bowl again.

Paging Robot Arm…

[11811]

@ralph124c

When regulatory/certification organizations like CSA, TUV, BSA, etc. evaluate flush toilets, do they use a “standardized” turd to test these appliances? I wonder if there is sch a thing as a CE description of such an object (defining the mass, size, consistency, etc.). After all, it must be possible to objectively test toilest; to do so must mean that you have to test them under the same conditions-hence the “standard turd”.
Just like the chickens they fire at airliner cockpit windows!

This would be a bog standard turd, no?

[Chief_Pedant]

This was all worked out in the 1800s by that Crapper fellow.

The unit for the Standard Turd is the faex.

Testing is certified against the number of faeces which can be flushed without residual debris left in the bowl.

Modifiers include a measure for stickiness (Unit is the Skid Mark, scale 1-3) and hardness of each faex (Unit is the Pile* Generator ((scale is 1-3)).

Thus, a high quality toilet might be able to flush 35 Faeces with an average Skid Mark of 9 and and a Pile Generator of 3.
*“Pile” as in “hemorrhoid”