I was having a vanilla day - not good, not bad… Just… you know?
Then I got up 10 minutes early to buy my 11:00 soda and went to the breakroom with 5 dimes and a nickel. In the Midwest, sodas are cheap!
So, I dropped the nickel in first, then each dime, allowing a beat in between each one because our machine is known to jam. In between the fourth and fifth dimes, I heard a funny, Las Vegas-type of sound.
Money had fallen down into the change receptacle!
Three quarters, two dimes and a nickel! WOOHOO! A BUCK! FREE MONEY!!
(Isn’t it a nice day?)
PS - I got my soda too! 
STOP! THIEF! Stealing money from the poor vending machine. What happens when that vending machine goes home for the day and tries to feed its kids? Didn’t you know vending machines eat money? Those poor starving kids. I will send the vending machine your address so it and its twenty starving kids can come up to your house and pose on your front lawn showing off how skinny they have gotten since they haven’t been able to eat for the last month because you stole a whole dollar from them. The poor things. Maybe if they got mad they could throw sodas at you. Which reminds me, did you know that sodas are a vending machines fecal material? I watched an episode of Futurama that showed the origin of Slurm so I know I am right. It is pretty disgusting. What are you going to do next? Steal candy from a baby? Beat up invalid grandmothers?
HEHEHHUGS!
Sqrl
Dimbert,
You will, of course, be reporting this on your 2000 tax return, hmmmmm?