It Sucks to be a Girl !(TMI)

Every damned month, I’ve got to go through this shit. I fucking hate it. I only have 2 weeks of the month that I’m good.

First I start to get PMS. I get horrible headaches, that no amout of Advil can knock out. My back hurts like a bitch. I am so fucking tired, and no mater how much sleep I get, I’m still tired.

And moody doesn’t even describe what I’m going through. The smallest things get me nervous, I start shaking under the stress of thinking about what to make for dinner. I’m ready to rip my husbands head off if he forgets to take out the trash. When my kids just do normal kid things I get mad at them. I want to beat the crap out of my neighbors and all the teachers at school not to mention the bus driver. Then I get depressed over things that happened years ago and can’t stop crying. The next minute, I’ll be laughing hysterically over a commercial, then crying again over another commercial.

About 5-7 days after that, the fun really starts, My period gets here. Now besides the exhaustion, headaches and intense back pain, I get stomach cramps and I have to pee every ten minutes. The two methods of dealing with peroids suck really bad too. I can either wear a diaper or stick cotton up my twat. Oh Joy ! And the first couple of days it’s so heavy that I’m afraid to leave the house, in case I need to change my pants. If I stand up or even shift in my seat, I feel this whoosh! and I know I better get to the bathroom.

I ask, then beg, then cry , then whine at my doctor to give me some relief, and then he can trouble himself to tell me to take 3 Advils instead of two. Oh Thanks So Much, Doc ! If he had to go thought it, I’ll bet he would try a little harder to help me out.

This really sucks !

Some suggestions:

Try Aleve and see if that helps. When I had dysmenorrhea that bad, nothing else helped me - I could take 3-4 Aleve, Midol, whatever, and they didn’t work. I was put on a prescription medication, Anaprox DS. It’s the same medication now available over-the-counter as Aleve/naproxen sodium.

Consider going to another doctor if this one doesn’t listen. Is this a primary physician, or a gynecologist?

I feel your pain dragongirl. Especially today. What I would like to know is from men…I don’t have a boyfriend or husband, but I have many male friends. When I’m in this state…bitchy and moody, crampy and achy and generally feel icky, do you, as men, want to know why? Or isn’t it enough to say “I don’t feel well”? I always feel awkward, like some teevee cliche, saying “it’s a girl thing,” but I don’t know how else to make you shut up about “what’s wrong, what’s wrong what’s wrong”

Not to pry, dragongirl , but are you on the pill? As soon as I went on it PMS all but went away, and I really only have to deal w/anything 3 days a month, and it’s hardly even noticable after the 1st day. SO can’t even tell when it’s “that time”.

Either way, I feel for you. It sound like you need to consult another Dr., there are ways to help and you shouldn’t have to go through this every month.

dragongirl - Check this site out here . It may be an option for you, though I’ve read about drug treatments that work as well. I sympathise with you, though my periods aern’t quite that bad normally (though from time to time they have been). Go see your OBGYN, I’m sure there’s something out there that can make life a little easier for you :). Take Care.

dragongirl - please try evening primrose oil, it has worked wonders for me. Nearly all symptoms gone (they were severe before) except for a few hours of medium-bad cramps one day a month. Chaste tree is also a good alternative remedy.

I sympathize with you, dragongirl, and would like to second the idea of going on the Pill (or perhaps switching Pills)… At any rate, talk to your doctor.

And let’s not forget the flipside of PMS/Squirting like a slaughtered hog… OVULATION (otherwise known as The Perpetual State of “Come to Mama, Big Fella!”).

I am ovulating right now.

And I’m single.

Men may never know the hell.

To make matters even worse, I’ve recently re-discovered my D’Angelo CD, after a year-long hiatus (he’s been my Car Music for the past couple of days), and oh, Honey. I don’t know if you’ve heard his “VooDoo” CD, but I am convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that the man’s singular goal in making it was to give the young fellas of today what Prince must have given HIM in the 80s: Music To Score By (and bless his FOINE juicy ass, he did a bang-up job, no pun intended).

Listening to that CD in my current state, it’s all I can do to keep from squealing into the parking lot of my local 7-11 and hurdling the counter to get down and dirty with the toothless hunk of man behind it. Last night I was in the Arby’s Drive-Thru and it took every ounce of self-control I had not to jump out of the car, grab the portly, mustachioed Assistant Manager (to whom I long ago gave the nickname “Cup-O-Cheddar”, for reasons I can no longer remember) by the ears and suck his face off as he reached out to me with my change.

I’m a mess.

I’d expect it depends on the guy, and also how close you are as friends. If you know a guy well enough to have a sense of how he’d react to “It’s that time of the month,” then trust your judgment. If you don’t, then dodge the question.

I personally prefer being told. To me, it’s no big deal, just a fact of life that I’m glad I don’t have to deal with directly.

we ain’t fragile, y’know…

I second the comments about the pill and Aleve. My period used to put me to bed for several days. The doc put me on the pill (this was right around the time I met Mr S, coincidentally) and Anaprox DS (I think it was 500 mg). Bingo, no more problems. Eventually I went off the Anaprox as well. I still sometimes feel crappy, but nowhere near the previous scale.

Time for another doctor, methinks. Your doctor is not listening and not helping.

For Hannahw:
By all means tells the guys the truth. Women tend to think that us guys are much more perceptive than we really are (“if you really loved me you wouldn’t have to ask me what I want for my birthday!”), when in fact most of the time we need things spelled out in black-and-white.

Most guys these days – at least the ones worth being friends with – know enough about PMS that a simple explanation of “it’s that time of the month” or something similar should be a sufficient explanation for your moodiness.

For Hannahw:
By all means tells the guys the truth. Women tend to think that us guys are much more perceptive than we really are (“if you really loved me you wouldn’t have to ask me what I want for my birthday!”), when in fact most of the time we need things spelled out in black-and-white (“I’d like the gold necklace with the diamond pendant I pointed out to you at the Bon last weekend”). Otherwise, you’re likely to unwrap you gift and find a cherry-red, lace teddy with matching thong underwear. But I diverge…

Most guys these days – at least the ones worth being friends with – know enough about PMS that a simple explanation of “it’s that time of the month” or something similar should be a sufficient explanation for your moodiness.

Sorry, I really need to run a grammar/spell check before I make my postings. sigh…!

I’ve been on the pill in the past, but it just gave me PMS all month long instead of once a month. The doctor is an OB/GYN, he’s one of only 3 in the area I can see because of my crappy insurance. He’s the best I can find.

I just feel like bitching.

oooh, other nasty girlie things.

i spent yesterday on my back with my legs in the air and a cold, hard, nasty speculum in my hoo-ha.

looks like i have a cervical erosion…it’s not cancerous or caused by infection, or painful, it’s just bloody annoying.

i can either:

a) change my pill,
which i love and which is the only one that doesn’t make me spotty and vomit or become a human fountain for 5 days. (said all this in another thread.)

b) go back to barrier methods
which aren’t exactly reliable and leave me mentally uneasy and physically unsatisfied. as well as the demon PMS and horrible crapms and ovulation pain that the pill prevents.

and since irishfella finds latex condoms painful and i hate polypropylene ones, it’s not even easy choosing the right ones!

c) put up with the spotting, post-coital bleeding and general yuckness
no, thank you, i don’t think i will. i do not want this to go on for more than the 3 weeks it has already.

d) have liquid nitrogen squirted up there, and all the cervix cells scraped off.
guess it’s this option. i can’t wait.

grrr…not a happy bunny.
and since i see my boy next week (for the first time in 6 weeks) i am hardly in a frame of mind where i want to “let my cervix get some rest” as my doc so eloquently put it.

in fact i want to give it a damn good workout.

so i’m going to do so, and get it sorted out after.

bloody hormones.

[i’d appreciate advice from any other dopers with this problem, all the doc kept saying was “not serious” and “easily treatable with a variety of options to go for”]

For some reason, I have this thing where women, even ones I’ve recently met, feel very comfortable talking about their menses with me. Which is fine.

I have horrific cramps and headaches during PMS/my period. Sometimes the pain is faint-worthy. Regular pain relievers do nothing and I’m stuck trying to find someone with Darvocet. Also, I turn into the most depressed, angry person on the planet. And my period is so heavy the first four days that I feel like I’m bleeding to death.

Not to mention my period’s usually anywhere from 2–9 days late.


My wonderful loving mother who is the only reason I have money or medical insurance refuses to let me see a gyno about it. She knows I’ll get put on birth control pills to try to control it, and her feelings about that are, and I quote, “I don’t want you to have that option.”

Apparently she thinks I’m going to run out and have sex with everything that moves the moment I get the Pill. The stupidity this woman is capable of scares me.


I’ve been thru the eroded cervix thing. It’s not fun, trust me. I had the liquid nitrogen thing done and that was 4 years ago. It is a little painful, but totally worth it. No bleeding since. You will have to give it “a rest” afterwards, maybe a week or so. It will sting a bit when you urinate and sometimes if you move wrong. But it is TOTALLY worth it.

I don’t know if this an option for you, but do you have a Planned Parenthood in your area, or something similar? They charge a sliding scale fee based on ability to pay. Even scraping up some money to spend on a quiet visit there would be better than dealing with that hell.

And it’s important that you get it checked out. It could possibly be something worse than just a heavy period.

Have y’all tried pot?

No, not the best PMS cure before you go off to work (try Aleve, as everyone else says). BUT, when you come home - take that hit, smoke that bowl, kick back, and chill.

It is the best thing to help many female friends. Not even that much, just a puff or two. Cramps and moodiness sort of melt away, so they say. And it’s not as if they were going to get a bunch of stuff done that night anyways…So if you are relegated to the couch with a hot-pad for the night, you might as well be comfortable.

And if you don’t smoke, you can mix it with melted chocolate and eat it.

Yet another medical reason to legalize it…

Just my $0.02 from other friends experiences…carry on.