. . .it’s the morons who work at these financial institutions.
Look retards, you call and ask how to submit an electronic file and we answer all your questions as very slowly. We point you to our site that has specific information. We mail you the same information with everything spelled out for you.
Here it is again:
1)NO HEADINGS! Goddamnit, no fucking headings. Do not put you company logo at the top of the worksheet. Do not name the columns. Do not name the fucking rows either.
2)In column A put the security name, in column B put the date, in column C put the quantity. . . is that so motherfucking hard to understand? Do not put the security name in column A and then leave a cute little column for spacing or symmetry or whatever brainleaking reason you have for putting useless columns in your spreadsheet. Do not put the date in column A, do not put the quantity in column F. What is your fucking problem, idiot?
3) Excel. Send it in Excel. Do not send it in Microsoft Works or Lotus or motherfucking Word. And, for God’s Christians Loving Sake DO NOT SEND IT IN A PDF FILE!!!
Individuals I can forgive because almost half the population has less than average intelligence. But you, big-assed Financial Institution, you deal with people’s money every day. You are supposed to have educated people working for you. You are not supposed to be this stupid. No wonder you are all going under left and right.
The idiots ran it into the ground. It’s just that the neocons deregulated everything in sight so the morons that work at the financial institutions could run it into the ground unfettered.
You really should accept submissions in XML instead of a proprietary spreadsheet format with positional semantics. That’s just bound to be error-prone.
I would point out that Neocons have virtually no economic program at all and leave that to others, and in fact that any regulatory problems stem from both Democrat and Republican Congresses, where neocons have essentially no influence, but at this point it seems like pointing out that the Sky is Blue to people who frequently stick red hot pokers in their eyesockets.
Christ, when this exact thing happened with me, the Excel spreadsheet was a step up from columns of numbers on printouts from Word that people used fax machines and pencils and calculators to manage. I’m not joking. The fact that I could sum up a column of numbers with a single mouse click made more than one head explode.
The project was a five-year budget projection for fifteen different agencies with capital and operating costs broken out. Until my arrival, the people doing this budget (and, apparently, all previous budget projections) had never opened Excel on their computers.
Indeed. Unfortunately, “neocon” seems to be the new “fascist”; i.e., a word people use to describe policies they dislike, without understanding the actual meaning of the word.
Businesses just did what businesses are always expected to do in a capitalist market: they did what was best for themselves. In the mortgage mess, it was a vicious snowball. Once one lender relaxed their guidelines, others had to follow suit to compete, etc etc. At a certain point it was obvious the ship was going down no matter what one company did, and the stupid thing (from a business/impersonal viewpoint) would be to not get it while the gettin’ was good. The “idiots” are the ones who honestly think no one saw this coming. I was a peon Account Manager at Bear Stearns and I saw this coming back in 2005. The people at the top sure as shit saw this coming. In Bear’s case, we were told explicitly that a shitstorm was on the horizon, but we would be one of the few companies to survive. Obviously that wasn’t how the cookie crumbled.
I do not give a shit about who in the fuck deregulated this country’s colon so much that it now blows (and sucks). I’m sure that asshole Democrats AND retarded Republicans both have me sitting here redoing their stupid ass spreadsheets so that something that should have taken a day or two will now take me over a week.
A goddamned PDF file! What the fucking fuck?!!??!!!
War usually has very strong economic repercussions. Bush certainly expected that we would have vast numbers of troops stationed in Iraq for many, many years, yet went with the war option anyway. The current economic meltdown might not have been so severe without all this war borrowing.