So, I was wondering whatever became of my friend, so I googled his name.
Turns out he’s got an article on mydeathspace.com (I will NOT provide a link or say who he was, so don’t even ask). Oh, and there’s a picture of him next to the article, so it’s definitely not some other dude with the same (relatively common) name.
Apparently, he was at a party and, completely out of the blue, had a brain aneurysm or something and jumped out a closed window to his death.
I’m looking at the accompanying discussion thread and it’s weird to see stuff like photoshopped jokes using old videogame graphics and people saying things like “This crazy shit is what got me addicted to mydeathspace.com”. I mean, I’ve laughed at these kinds of threads before, but it’s kind of different when you knew the subject. I guess it’s like when you go to fark.com and read some news article about someone dying in some dumb way and everyone in the article laughs (including me) and has a good-old photoshopping time or whatever, but you forget that that person actually had friends and parents who loved them.
What a fucking waste. He was so smart and friendly and had so many friends (I’m not just saying this because he died; it’s really true), and to have him die before he’s even old enough to rent a car without extra fees is ridiculous. I wish I had attended his funeral, at least, but he died a few years ago.
Please spare me the “hugs” or “you have my sympathies”. I apologize if this sounds hostile. I’m not here for sympathy, but to see what everyone’s opinion on this is, and if anyone’s gone through anything similar. I’m not actually that upset about it.
Why the hell am I talking about this to strangers on the internet?
I ran a facebook search on a childhood friend, found her in some sort of grief group for the death of her only son. The death was in 2007, so it would be odd to send condolences now, but I was sad for her.
When I feel a bit more sanguine, I’ll drop her a note out of the blue and wait for her to bring that up.
Talking to (not quite complete) strangers on the internet: a new facet of life.
Google often makes it possible to answer the question “I wonder whatever happened to…” But if it is the means by which you learn of someone’s death, the connection to that person has certainly become tenuous.
I’ve learned a number of things about old friends/acquaintances through Google that I found surprising, or at least interesting:
a grammar school friend went on to become a prominent gay rights attorney. Her wife is transgendered, MTF.
an old boyfriend was criminally prosecuted for breaking FDIC rules (although not convicted on all charges).
a former employer abandoned his adopted child, spawning a major outrage in Ireland and a made-for-TV movie.
another former employer, who I expected to have a fairly visible career as a writer of radical polemics, has published almost nothing in the last quarter century, and still promotes (on his website) his three-page 1983 screed against Ronald Reagan as one of his major accomplishments.
an old friend won an anti-discrimination lawsuit against a Japanese company.
I’ve never learned of the death of any past friends by Googling them, however.
Anybody puts me on some creepy “I’mdeadnow” website, I’m coming back and haunt their ass. Yes, I will. Screw the laws of physics. I’ll find a way.
You’re all over the place in your original post, it sounds like you’re still in mourning.
I don’t know what I’d do if I saw a friend posted on mydeadspace.com. If I was a good enough friend I’d know about it before it made the website. I’d be sad, of course, but I figure that one personal friend is now on there for millions of people to see just as other peoples’ friends have been.