I figure if anybody can take the TMI it’s you guys. I’ve been having wimmin problems lately, and decide to haul my ass off to a doctor. So my buddy gave me the number of her doctor (mine had retired) and off I went. She said she wanted to stop by the dr’s office and say ‘Hi’ to them anyway, and could drive me home afterwards.
Now this is weird to begin with anyway, because for once I’m looking forward to going, just so’s I can figure out what’s wrong with me. I get there and they were very nice, not that I expected them not to be, but just friendly and included me in conversation and stuff. So the exam goes as normal, until my cell phone rings. Dr says to the assistant, “Would you please get that for her?” :eek: I quickly tell them that ‘that’s OK I don’t quite feel like talking while I have my bits in the air and things sticking out of my body.’ Then I make the BIG mistake of laughing.
Have you ever seen a child laugh or cough while changing their diaper? For some reason, maybe because he saw the joke of it this many years down the line, God made it so that SOME muscles that SHOULDN’T be related to laughter are used when we even give the slightest chuckle.
Well, back to the subject at hand, I’m laying on the table with my feet in the stirrups and a speculum up my woo-ha and I giggle. Remember those muscles I was just talking about? They started waggling the speculum around, all by themselves. There is this sweet little lady standing at the base of the table trying to examine me and I’m waving the speculum in her face. The worse problem is, I was stuck in this vicious circle because every time I laughed it waggled more, and them I’d laugh again, and it would move again. I have to go back again next week, I hope I can keep myself together then. I’m still giggling like an idiot. (Shh, peanut gallery)
not to sound obscene, but did the speculum tickle or something when you laughed, causing you to laugh more, or was it a cause-and-effect laughter, where you keep laughing for a while because you keep thinking the same chain of events (sorry just curious)
This reminds me of a funny story that happened to my Mom’s boyfriend. He was getting a prostate exam when his pager (on the table next to him) went off. Doctor asks if he wants him to get it. Mom’s boyfriend, with doctor’s hand in his ass, says “Don’t worry about it”
mia, I mis-read your titile as “fun at the GYM”, and spent half of the time I was reading your OP wondering why your Gym had doctors who dealt with wimmen problems. If I used the smack smilie, I’d be putting three or four of them in here.
Regardless, I feel your pain. I HATE pelvic exams (although I doubt there’s many women out there who look forward to them), and it seems like every time I get one something goofy happens to make me feel even stupider. The absolute worst though is when the Doc gets all chatty, asking me about my family and whatnot while he’s wrist-deep. Aaagghhh! For the love of all that is holy just shut up and get it over with!!
Incubus, While I am very ticklish in that area, I wasn’t being tickled by the speculum itself. Just stuck in that cause-effect thing you were talking about.
bella, I used to feel the same way too, I had this older guy Dr. who was great, but ‘just business’ which sort of makes sense. I guess if you’re a male GYN and you’re TOO friendly, you might spook your patients. She though was making small talk and I was actually comfortable, go figure.
Sorry to scare you, Mr. DeDay, but I DID say TMI. I’m sure you can relate, you have to cough for the doctor too, (although I hope there’s nothing stuck in you when you do, you could put someone’s eye out)
I used to giggle uncontrollably when I needed to have a blood sample drawn. This was a big time-waster for both the tech and me. Fortunately, I seem to have grown out of it.
The technician once made me laugh during a Brazilian Bikini wax . . .
. . . but perhaps that story belongs in a farting thread. :eek:
My question is, what would you have said once you answered the phone and the caller casually asked, “Whatcha doin’?”
And does your new GYN have lovely pictures on the ceiling for you to look at during the process? My old one used to have an Alaskan Wildlife poster on her ceiling, with the animals numbered and a key over to the side so that you could learn what they were. My boyfriend at the time cracked up when I told him how I learned to identify an eider.
I thought for sure the punchline would be that you laughed so hard, you shot the speculum out and impaled the doctor’s face… So she looked like Daffy Duck.
