Yay Chimera!
So, guess who’s back here, and aparently living with us again. My mother.
She apparently said something that got her kicked out of her apartment somehow, so she came back here.
There are many reasons my dad, sister and I don’t want my mother living with us again.
Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck.
FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH A GODDAMN RUSTY CORKSCREW.
Congratulations, Chimera! I’m so happy for you!
Hey, wait, this isn’t the right discussion for a mini-rants thread at all! 
Yow. I buy a dozen eggs a week – isn’t that about two hen’s worth? – and I paid $1.49 for the last dozen. It would take me 168 weeks for the free eggs to offset the cost of the automatic door. 
Of course, I buy the cheapo, non-organic eggs.
Oh, Chimera, that is SO wonderful!!! :D:D:D
And EmilyG, that is so sucky. :mad::(:mad:
Sah-weet Chimera! Drinks on you at the next DopeFest!
Do that, then have a drink and a well-earned relaxing evening, if possible. Congratulations!
looks at where I am, then just forgets again and runs around throwing confetti and glitter around
Congrats Chimera!!!
Offers EmilyG a tube rose lei and some chocolate covered macadamias. Hands out coffee and treats to everyone.
My rant: Our cats have gained weight. This was a mystery to me, because the pet sitter knew how much to feed them. Bill figured it out, Karen was giving them treats because they looked so sad and lonesome. Yeah, I’ll just bet that those lying beasts were suffering. “Is that tuna, please give us some, we haven’t eaten for days, weeks, months!”
Wooo and a whole lotta hoooo!
Jeep wave
How old is your battery? Aging batteries have caused some really bizarre issues in my '97 ZJ over the years.
Yay Chimera!! happy dance
I should save this rant for one of the cooking disaster threads that pop up from time to time, but I feel the need to vent now. I put some chicken stew in the crock-pot for dinner tonight. When I got home and checked on it the stew was a little thinner than it should be, so I figured I’d use some cornstarch to thicken it up a bit. I grab my little plastic jar that I use for this purpose, put some cornstarch in, spoon some of the stew liquid in, and snap the lid in place.
Commence shaking jar. POP The plastic in the jar must have been just old and brittle enough that the hot stew caused the side of the jar to crack and the lid to blow off. Stew everywhere. The jar wasn’t that big, I’m not sure how this epic mess happened. There was stew on the ceiling. My pre-school aged nieces would’ve been proud of this mess. Anyone familiar with the painting by explosives episode of “Mythbusters”? Yeah, it kind of looked like that.
I had to remove everything from all my kitchen counters, wipe everything off including all four walls, throw the rug in the washer, get out the step-stool to clean the ceiling, and mop the floor. This was all before boyfriend came over for dinner.
Oh and boyfriend? He’s all lovey-dovey with the text messages and acted mostly like his old self today, but he did take off right after dinner instead of hanging out watching TV like he usually does. I have no idea what’s really going on or what will happen next. Sigh.
wanders off to check for more stew splatters
Dr. G, I’m sad about your situation with your boyfriend, but has to confess that I laughed at your cooking mishap.
Please don’t hate me too much! Would it help if I told you how I learned that getting distracted and forgetting that pan of eggs boiling on the hotplate is a Very Bad Thing?
It’s fine, flatlined, I figured I could give you guys a good laugh! It’s actually kind of funny now! And I just found another stew splatter on the side of my computer desk, which is in another room a good 10 feet from where I was standing in the kitchen. What a mess. I should’ve taken a picture.
Did I congratulate you on your marriage yet? Well better twice than not at all!
It worked, I know that I’m not the only one who laughed 
I showed your post to my husband and he laughed and told me about blowing up a microwave by trying to make nachos without cutting the cheese into little chunks.
Hot wet stuff sure does splatter doesn’t it?
And I’m pretty sure you did, but twice is always good. Thank you
The things you learn after you get married. “what’s that scar?” “oh, that’s where I got shot in a drug deal, didn’t you notice the exit wound?” !!!
(a pound of pot back when my husband was in college)
So, I’m a bank robber and my husband is a drug dealer. Its a match made in heaven
High fives Chimera!
We’re now officially looking forward to many years of rants about lusers that think policies and procedures don’t apply to them.
And I’m giving notice now that you can expect my resume if my work keeps pissing me off.
Dogs do the woebegone, “Oh please, won’t you feed this sweet little puppy,” but they have nothing on cats for deliberate misleading - “Breakfast? Never heard of it. I certainly haven’t eaten yet today!”
Dr. Girlfriend, it was a different kind of mess, but I picked up a bag of rice upside down one day and the seal gave way - I don’t think I will ever get all the rice out of my kitchen. I still keep finding it in various places, and this was years ago.
'Course not, you should use a meat mincer.
Oh my God! Ohmygodohmygodohmygod!
CONGRATULATIONS CHIMERA!
returns Jeep Wave
Happy update: my husband, aka The Best Husband In The World, discovered a broken wire that was corroded and just hangin’ around the distributer box. He cleaned it up, replaced it where it should go, boosted my battery and All Is Well.
I drove it to the beer store and back for his troubles 
and it started perfectly and the battery charged back up to just a smidge below 14, where IIRC the gauge usually resides. This morning it was fine.
It’s actually a brand new battery, the old one died of old age a couple of weeks ago. It was probably around 5 years old, which apparently is average.
Congratulations, Chimera!!!
I hate it when people put a cigarette behind their ear. It looks so stupid!