I was at work when I remembered kaylasmom having expressed a hankering for a quiche Lorraine. So, when my shift ended I decided to look up a recipe online for the Bisquik version, so I could stop at the supermarket and pick up the ingredients I’d need.
Look, Ms Pinterest, you don’t have to talk me into the recipe; I looked YOU up, remember? Just cut to the chase. If I were on a desktop computer, I could just hit Ctrl+F and and type in “Preheat.” But my phone doesn’t have a Ctrl key, so I need you to place your deathless prose AFTER the recipe.
And another thing: Prep time 5 minutes? The recipe calls for TWELVE strips of bacon, fried crispy, drained, blotted, and crumbled. Just a reminder, dear. Your readership, such as we are, do NOT generally have a sous-chef on staff; if we did, we’d have him just make the friggin’ quiche the traditional way, while we busied ourselves with a fresh spinach salad with strawberries and a balsamic vinaigrette. So don’t blow smoke up my ass about how little prep time I need to budget.
What, you didn’t read the blog post about the benefits of trichinosis? Which reminds me, today’s peeve: people spewing, er reposting nonsense that is dangerous and/or has long been debunked, I just “unfollowed” a nutrition group for their pushing miracle cures, aka that magic water memory, and a Veterans’s group because of racist posts about Obama and “other Muslims”. Good grief.
Some of the recipes I look up online cause near eye-sprain from all the rolling they’re doing - “2 free-range eggs, 1 cup free-trade organic coconut flour, 1 tablespoon organic, GMO free baking soda…” Sheesh. I need a “non-vegan, GM-friendly, I’m not interested in your organic food scam” filter for recipes.
A college course requires the “second edition” of an expensive textbook, written by the professor teaching the course. Prof won’t allow anyone to attend without the “second edition”.
Difference between first edition and second? Other than what’s printed on the copyright page, front cover, and spine–zero difference!
Same thing. The lil’wrekker had a prof with the same demands. Only problem the bookstore never got the new edition. No old ones available. Finally found it online. Came w/o the cover. It was a sheaf of papers shrink wrapped. And pricey. I dared that prof to object.
Someone told me that gluten-free shampoo actually is a thing, since someone who has celiac disease might get it in their mouth. It seems like a stretch to me, but if you have serious celiac disease, you might want to be careful with your shampoo. I don’t get shampoo in my mouth often, but it has happened.
I’m reminded of the ancient era of naive innocence when people were just starting to speculate about computers in the home, and the perennial question was what the hell a typical person would use a home computer for. One of the common suggestions was that it could be used for keeping recipes!
Great imaginative prediction! I have some 30+ terabytes of storage in and around over half a dozen computers and tablets around the house, and among all of them I think I have exactly three recipes, one of which is some of my own notes on the making of potato salad. Don’t remember what the other ones were. They may have been deleted or just lost among zillions of other files by now. Not really a major use of computers around here!
I have many cook books. Seems I rarely look at them any more. Pinterest just pisses me off. These days I am cooking much more simply. If it has 3 ingredients you really don’t need a recipe.
Sigh. The place I live is doing a kinda cool temporary civic art thing (Think Horse sculptures, pig sculptures, that sort of thing). So, we went out to check it out. On foot. About halfway through our intended adventure, it started to rain. Rain with big gusty winds. It let up, and Dad checked his weather app, and we walked on to see one more example, and while we were there, it started to rain again, even harder. We gave up and walked back to the car, getting soaked to the skin, and testing the waterproofing on various cameras, cell phones, watches, etc.
This was irritating, but what was worse? No rain at our house. Not one drop. It’s pretended to rain a little since then, but . . . not enough to really benefit the assorted plants in our yard.
The night is still young, though, maybe the next thunderstorm will actually get us.
But, here, just try a little. You’ll love it! Really. Okay, I’m going to eat the piece I was giving you… Mmm, that is SO good… just so I can get you a fresh piece. Here, look. See the color? That means it’s fresh, even with a little green on the edges. Here, I’ll just put it on your plate. Well, you might change your mind. Try a tiny bite with a sip of red wine, here, do what I do, take a bite first, appreciate it on its own THEN take a sip of wine and let it dissolve in your mouth. Isn’t that… oh, you haven’t tried it yet. Well, when you do, it’ll be incredible. So… it’s there on your plate. If you want it. No big deal if you don’t. But don’t forget.
“Oh, don’t worry; you don’t really have a shellfish allergy.” Or, better yet, “Don’t worry about it; put the shrimp in it; he won’t notice.”
Well, not until I stop breathing I won’t. I’m now firmly convinced that the reason I don’t meet any adult Chinese here with food allergies is that everyone who has a food allergy [del]is murdered by idiot parents and cooks[/del] died from said allergies in their youth.
No, but the mobile versions of both Chrome and Firefox have a Find In Page command that does the same thing. Click the the More Options icon (three dots). Other mobile web browsers probably have this too.
I have some 30+ terabytes of storage in and around over half a dozen computers and tablets around the house, and among all of them I think I have exactly three recipes, one of which is some of my own notes on the making of potato salad. Don’t remember what the other ones were. They may have been deleted or just lost among zillions of other files by now. Not really a major use of computers around here!