Rue, what is it with you?? Do you never pick up your messages?? What happenned to my damn pizza - I’m starving to death here???
I suppose your out again wasting all your money on gambling, booze and trying to pick up women. You really should get in touch with those ‘Viagra’ people and I’m sure you’d have a lot more success with that - I sent you all those e-mail adverts for it anyway - about 2,000 of them - since you’re not picking your phone messages up!!
Anyway, get back to me - and bring pizza!!!
This is a Broadcast Message for all of those on this voicemail system. Tomorrow the north entrance to Building 3 will be closed due to work in that area. Please use the south entrance to Building 3, handicapped access to Building 3 can be through Building 4.
Rue? It’s me… Well, I have some news for you… I just got the results of the test and you’re - beep
Uhh, hello? Uhh, have you folks lost a pet orangutan? I think I found him…He was in my side yard rootin’ through the garbage when I got home tonight from the mill. He let me close enough to get yer number offa’ his tags. He’s a right friendly feller. Matter-a-fact, he’s made hisself right at home. He’s sittin right in the den here kicked back in the Lazyboy sippin’ on a brew and watchin’ wrastlin. Give me a call back so’s you can come fetch 'im. If I don’t answer the phone right away, it’ll be cuz we ast some of the boys over to play poker and it might be a touch rowdy in here.
By the way, I been callin’ him Bubba.
Hey, um, Rue, I think I may have, um… I may be responsible for what you find on your front lawn when you get up this morning. I’m not positive, tho - it’s all kinda fuzzy. I should prolly talk to my doc about getting my meds adjusted…
Anyway, if it’s as bad as I kinda think it is, I’m really really sorry and, um, I’ll get over there as soon as I can to fix it. I don’t think it’s “Super-Fund Site” bad, but, uhhh, you might wanna keep the kids and dogs away just in case.
I’m sure your grass will grow back just fine. Eventually.
I’m really really sorry, man…