Just Pitting a random asshole I encountered yesterday

So, dude, when you enter a revolving door, and give it a big ol’ shove because you’re in such a hurry, do you:

a) Not realize that you’re smacking anybody who’s already in the revolving door in the ass, or

b) Not care?

If someone had been just exiting the door at that moment, you could have given them a really good squishing. I’d like to think you wouldn’t have done that, but I really don’t know.

I vote b.

One time I got to do what everybody dreams of doing: Stop the door when someone is in there. The victim was my brother and I made sure nobody else was going through the door first. He was being goofy and walking through it without touching it, hands clasped behind his back. So being the gracious, loving sister that I am, I had to see what would happen if the door stopped moving. :smiley:

So. Worth. It.

Not that I don’t agree with the OP, and indeed share his pain (in my ASS!) but for some reason I am having an uncontrollable fit of the giggles picturing this.

We have a revolving door at work and I have noticed some people really give it the old Wheel of Fortune spin, and I have to step back and wait until the rpms simmer down, but I’ve never had the misfortune to actually be *in *the thing at the time.
I give this pitting a 10 for humor.

Okay, now I’m picturing an old lady (cartoonishly old, in full Mary Poppins regalia with a carpet bag and an umbrella) tottering through a revolving door at the rate of a snail. Someone, like JcWoman maybe, gives the door a shove, and Granny McFanny has to run as fast as she can for a dozen laps before she can get out.

Why, yes, in my daydream Granny is trying to curse (“Oh, my stars, it appears I am intercoursed!”), and Yakety Sax is playing.


cjepson, you’re gonna have to crank up the vitriol before this turns into a full blown clown show.

“. . . it appears I am intercourse !” indeed.

Nah, I admit it is kind of funny. (Except for the remote but non-zero possibility of someone getting squished as they try to exit… perhaps the aforementioned little old lady, who maybe shouldn’t be in the revolving door in the first place, assuming that there’s a regular door available.)

Lots of sympathy here - back when I was having knee surgery and walking with a cane, I ran into these jackasses with some regularity. No, I can’t walk faster. No, I’m not going to use the non-revolving door - it’s half a block away, almost too heavy to move, and opens with the hand that I need for my cane. Yes, it hurts a whole lot when you knock me off balance and I have to catch myself with my injured leg. That’s why I yelled at you.

Pro-Tip: If you have Decent shoes or boots on you can just take a long step leaving your trail foot on the ground a while (inside foot works better). The door will hit your heel and stop dead. The asshole will crash into the partition in front of him while you turn to make a shocked face at your foot to see what hit it.

Unfortunately the spoilsports who make the damn things usually put a break away mechanism on each partition at some level of force so they won’t actually crack their face open and die. but it’s still pretty satisfying listening for the face-glass thud.

I haven’t seen a revolving door in ages. Where do they still have those?

B would be me. I prefer to make sure no one ever forgets that i’m a ****

We had powered revolving doors, they detected a body and start spinning. Your job to time your entrance. Security guard would push a button for people with walkers, canes, or just looking a bit frightened by the speed of the thing.
If by some break in the law of physics, you managed to get in and up to speed enough to push the door faster, it just would not, ever. The drive motor controlled the speed completely. If the sensor didn’t detect you, the doors stood solid until you put enough force to pop the emergency exit feature.

Forgot to add, if you stopped, dropped your cane, fell, or got a body part caught between the door and the frame. The door Stopped right there and backed off a couple of inches. No need for an alarm. When the doors did that the scream of the motor let everyone know. Still, don’t put your fingers in there, it would be a bad thing if it failed that one time.

I love this! Don’t know if I’d ever have the balls to try it but I would love to watch it happen.

They’re not a common thing in my area and I’m not even sure why we have one. Guess it’s to impress all the high falutin visitors we have. I noticed they’re everywhere in Chicago and assumed it was to keep the elements from getting in the building(?)

Related to the topic:

Security cam footage of a malfunctioning revolving door (youtube).

I believe this was a malfunction of the fire escape feature of the door. They’re supposed to collapse to a single plane of doors, just not with people in them at the time.

Yep, they function as a sort of airlock that keeps the lobby from being flooded by outside air like a traditional door does. Much easier on the HVAC.

This is why you’ll sometimes see signs on the normal doors asking you to use the revolving door. They’re required to have normal doors for fire escape purposes, but they’d prefer you use the revolving.

The Detroit Lions used to play in the Pontiac Silverdome, the roof of which was supported by air pressure. They had revolving doors to contain the pressure. They also had regular doors for fire escapes and big signs telling everyone not to use them except in an emergency. People would use them anyway and there was a huge wind gust rushing out the door whenever they were opened.

After a football game ended and lot of people used the regular doors the roof would have a noticeable sag

Must not…make obvious joke…

Some of the commenters suggest, and it looks like there may be some evidence in favour, that the disaster was caused by someone trying to enter from the street side in the wrong direction.

Go ahead, I can take it :stuck_out_tongue:

You can take it? In the ass? I don’t want you to be tense about this. Let me get you a drink. How about a nice Cosby Colada?

Well, **Bricker ***has *endorsed your point so . . . make mine a double.