Kitchen lessons learned by trial and error...

Microwave safety (in terms of dishes): I used a plastic plate I’ve often used to hold defrosting chicken in the microwave to heat up a steam-in-bag bag of vegetables. I heard the cracks, but thought it came from the bag. Only when I went to retrieve my veggies did I smell the weird smell, see the discoloration and cracking. Turns out it wasn’t as microwave safe as I thought it was - it only seemed that way because I was thawing frozen chicken that absorbed the excess heat. Without it: smell, cracks.

The plate’s still on my counter, stinking up the joint, while I figure out if there are any throwaway uses for it, or if I’d be better off just tossing the damn thing.

What lessons have you learned that way?

Although I ought to have known better, I found to my cost that you can’t use a pyrex dish to provide steam while baking your bread. The sudden injection of water causes it to shatter.

Glass can generally tolerate indirect heat, even boiling. But what it can’t tolerate is sudden temp changes, like dunking a hot glass into cold or room temp water. I’ve learned this the hard way.

Oh my sister once assumed hey since you can put a pyrex into the oven, it should be ok to use as a put on the stove top right? Wrong, boiling water and shattered pyrex everywhere.

I learned that electric burners can still be quite hot, even if they aren’t glowing red, when I put a dinner plate on one that I thought was cold. Five minutes later, I hear a loud crack and bits of dinner plate are scattered all round the kitchen floor.

And once my roommate went out to get taquitos and was kind enough to pick me up one, even though I was asleep at the time, and put it in the fridge. When I do wake up and head for the kitchen for coffee, he kindly informs me theres a lovely taco waiting for me. Just have to put it in the nuclearator. I pick up the paper bag with the taco inside and go to nuke it for a minute. Now, bear in mind that the taco place puts it’s to go orders in foil. While making coffee I smell burning, turn around and the microwave is on fire! That’s right, the arcing off the foil ignited the paper bag. So, I ruined a perfectly lovely taco from the best joint in town with the fire extinguisher, but saved the microwave AND the apartment from a fiery death. And needless to say, I didn’t need any coffee that day.

Placing ice in a glass of hot tea to make iced tea results in broken glass (and bloody hands).

Not curling your fingers under when using a french knife results in a trip to the ER to save your finger.

Metal objects placed in a toaster that is plugged in results in a shock (and a new toaster).

You can boil rice in the microwave. You can boil an egg in the microwave. You cannot boil an egg in the same pot as rice in the microwave. The rice will absorb the water, and when it does, the eggs go BOOOOOOOM! and blow open the door of the microwave, spewing egg-napalm all over your dorm room and royally pissing off your roommate, the owner of the microwave.

Not quite as dramatic, but baking soda and baking powder are NOT interchangeable.

Flavored coffee creamers cannot be used in place of milk in a frosting recipe.

Defrosting a frozen tub of Cool Whip in the microwave results in a steaming tub with a little bit of white liquid.

Making a custard pie (e.g. pumpkin) in a non-stick pie tin is contraindicated. Any deviation from the horizontal tends to result in pumpkin-flavored napalm all over the kitchen, and the cook.

Also, make sure you’re wearing long pants before testing the above theory. Trust me on this.

Actually, even boiling an egg in the microwave without the rice turns out to be not a good idea. We just lost the microwave in our office that way. The door was ruined in the blast.

A pot that boils over on a gas stove can extinguish the flame.

Check the darkness setting on the toaster oven before using it.

Sometimes it’s better to just throw away the tupperware in the back of the fridge instead of trying to wash it.

Don’t put dish soap in the dishwasher.

Corn oil is not a valid substitute for vegetable oil when baking blueberry muffins.

I have found that if you scramble the egg sufficiently, you can microwave it and get a nice, fluffy product as a result. But if you leave the yolk with any critical mass in the mix it becomes explosive.

I did that once. Wasn’t the disaster people imagine. Just had to wash them again.

If you put a wooden spoon on a pot of boiling liquid on the stove, it won’t boil over.

And don’t put a pot full of spaghettios that is meant for the stove, into the microwave.

This is the first one I’ve never heard before. Why not?

Using the same amount of pepper in rice vs noodle dishes results in lava-like rice but very mild noodles.

Also, a mere few drops of oil inthe water will break up the surface tension enough that it won’t boil over.

I’ve tried both of these tricks. Neither worked.

Agreed, **Antigen **- lies, all lies!

Antigen–you need more oil. Just a few drops won’t do it; somewhere between a teaspoon and tablespoon works. For me, anyway.

My roommate and I got away with boiling eggs in the microwave every day for the year we shared a microwave. That was (ulp) getting on for fifteen years ago though, microwaves weren’t what they are now.