You little self-absorbed tampon. I was sitting in my car when some 18-20something airhead bitch drove (pssgr right rear seat) by and squirted me.
GRRRRRR!
Now, I’m an easy going type a fella. I have been called “harmless”,“nice”,“laid-back”,etc. But make no mistake, when I’m fucked with (physically) I get (In the words of C.Eastwood) plum mad-dog mean.
So I put the ole Ponycar into gear and persue the little shits. I catch them by the first stoplight. I catch the plate and call it in. They were squirting tourists this whole time,and by their reactions pissing alot of people off. I get ahead of them and have time to exit my car. They pull to the stop sign. At which point the little miss I-can-get-away-with-fucking-with-tourists squirts two tourists between myself and their vehicle. At this point I walk towards the car,point directly at her and yell: “HEY, YOU BETTER KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF LITTLE GIRL!”
Her eyes widen as if to say “oh shit”. Same with the two young men in the front seats. They zoom their car out of there quick. I catch them again by a local grocery store. I see the two guys in the front seats.She was in the store. I size up the situation and conclude that if they step up I stand a pretty good chance of coming out on top. I’m prepared.
I aproach and say:“Hey, a young lady squirted me from your car”
Him:“no”
Me: “yes, And I don’t apreciate that shit”
He nods"OK" I look at his partner and he doesn’t even look in my direction. They see that I’m pissed and don’t want trouble, so I remain calm.
Him:“Sorry we thought you were a tourist”
Me:“They don’t like that shit either, and for future reference, you may just fuck with the wrong person and not know it until shit goes down. OK?”
He nods.
By this time the young lady aproaches the car and I inquire “Is that the young lady?” Him:“no” She doesn’t even look at me either. But I know better.
And for the record the males in the front weren’t little kids they were grown men, lest you think I was picking on kids.
Squirted you? With what? A watergun or spray bottle? With water? Is this a common prank in your area? Anyone trying something like that in MY neighborhood might find themselves getting slapped silly, if they’re lucky.
If I thought it was anything other than water…well things would have been different, to say the least.
Not at all.
Ya. I have a friend of a friend I’ll call “meanguy” If she made the mistake of squirting meanguy. Those young men in the front seats wouldn’t look the same by evening. Hence the warning.
I, too, am confused by the OP. Apparently you were sitting in your car when you were squirted by a tampon, which does sound unpleasant but is rather hard to picture. And what exactly was squirted—your car? Your face? (how? through the window?) Were you driving at the time, or sitting in a parked car? Was there any sort of danger or damage involved, or were you just annoyed at getting wet, much as if it had unexpectedly started raining?
Just annoyed/angered. Just as I would be angered if someone were to say… Crumple a piece of paper and throw it at my head. Nope no danger involved there either. And no there wouldn’t be any damage involved nor would I get wet. However if some asshole did that, they may find themselves catching an elbow to the chin and winding up flat on their back. Nope it’s not false pride Thudlow. It’s the trees man. They would,in effect be wasting paper. In turn harming the environment. That would really chap my granola-eatin tree-huggin sandal-wearin eco-terrorist ass. You dig?
Now that would imply that others(someone other than yourself) are confused also now wouldn’t it? I count five other posters who werent confused. (One of which is an admin and another a mod)
Yeah, there’s lots of guys who could be called “meanguy” around my neighborhood. I’m thinking that maybe it wouldn’t be such a terrible thing for SquirtGirl and her driving buddies to run into a Meanguy or two. Meanguys are noted for their lack of a sense of humor. They’ve even been known to be tourists, on occasion.
Look, I think you did well overall, but your confrontational communications skills could use a little… polishing. Specifically your vocabulary could use work. “Appreciate” has a conciliatory connotation, and this makes it an entirely inappropriate word to use when starting a confrontational dialogue.
If you don’t mind my making a suggestion, plosives are perfect for this sort of situation. I find that short sentences like “You stop that crap, boy.” or “Cut the shit, O-K?” are surprisingly effective introductory lines, especially when said while standing close enough to your audience that your spit tickles at the back of their sinuses. This helps set the tone of the negotiation (and remember, you never get a second chance to make a first impression.) Save “appreciate” for after you have made your point (i.e., “Yeah, I’d appreciate that.”, said after he nods), to show that, as a man of character, you recognize this other man’s earnest effort to show some character himself.
You could borrow a line from Seinfeld that struck terror into the hearts of Kramer and Jerry. “Are choo squirting at me?” (Note: must deliver with effeminate Puerto-Rican accent.)
Oh, I’ve been there. Just last year I was just riding around, minding my own business on a nice summer day, and I got shot with a water gun. Right in the side of the head through my open truck window.
The little peckerheads weren’t expecting what came next.
I turned across the flow of traffic and followed them down a side street, they began to speed up to try and get away, that is until I popped on the lights and siren.
The aforementioned peckerheads turned white as sheets when they saw my truck light up like that, and pulled sheepishly over to the side of the road.
I still use that supersoaker by the pool to this day, and hopefully, they use the lesson the 1/2 hour “lecture” I gave, provided.
Is it really that big of a deal? You got hit with some water that’ll evaporate in 5 minutes, that’s about as harmless of a prank as you can get. When I think of some of the shit that my friends and I did growing up, squirting people with water pistols doesn’t seem like anything to get upset about. You should be glad they didn’t have an automatic paintball gun like mine.
I think what Tony and Button did was great. Kids getting away with stuff like that is often a prelude to worse adult behavior. Give them a foot, they’ll take a yard, and all that. To a certain extent, the earlier you can put a scare into them, the better. Before they graduate to using guns.
Have we fallen that far down the slope of tolerating bad behavior that it’s no big deal to be inconvenienced for the entertainment of a stranger? Yes, it’s a big deal. There is a happy medium between being a doormat and “keepin’ it real”-style overreaction. We’ve gone too far in the doormat direction. There’s no real reason for anyone to show anyone basic respect and courtesy anymore because we’ve gone so far downhill that it’s an everyday thing to be treated as someone’s cheap entertainment, whether it’s squirting, as in the OP, or a drive-by shouted insult.
Every time something like this happens and people say “It’s just water…they were just having a little fun!” we move another step away from civilization. Bah.
You should be glad you didn’t shoot at me with your automatic paint gun, if indeed you are implying that you and your friends did such a thing. And I question the growing up part.
Apparently you were sitting in your car when you were squirted by a tampon, which does sound unpleasant but is rather hard to picture. And what exactly was squirted—your car? Your face? (how? through the window?) Were you driving at the time, or sitting in a parked car? Was there any sort of danger or damage involved, or were you just annoyed at getting wet, much as if it had unexpectedly started raining?