For those who don’t want to click on a link to chick.com (Dearly Fucking Dead Forever Jack Chick’s site), it’s two panels are captioned (if you want the images, I’m gonna make ya click):
As we get closer to the second coming of Jesus…Satanism will increase. So will human sacrifice!*
Halloween started in the British Isles with the Druids. Those guys were really spooky.**
Yeah, that’s what I have him pegged for. A butthurt christian who can’t believe that we would disrespect his Jeebus.
Edited to add: Yes, I am actually MUCH worse in real life. People still seem to like me. They call and ask me to do stuff with them, at least.
ETA2: Hey Annoyed: your dumb ass isn’t in Texas, either, are ya?
*Why? Is Jesus Causing this? That stupid fucker.
**Ooooooo! Sounds awesome, where do I find out more about those guys?
Heh, those nutballs are where I learned to get good at being rude. I would be walking to class, have a few minutes, and would decide to debate them. Did you know that they have lackeys who try to distract you if you try to do that. I’m blessed with a voice that can compete with anything short of a small PA system, so I’d look that person in the eye and say at the top of my voice “NO, ASSHOLE, I DON’T WANT TO TALK TO YOU. I WANT TO TALK TO THAT ASSHOLE!” After that, they’d try to do their duty, but from far outside whispering distance.
In all deference to Annoyed the last time I heckled a “BARACK OBAMA DOESN’T DO ANYTHING FOR BLACK PEOPLE!!!” street preacher (I didn’t bother trying to figure out what brand of monotheism they were selling and they didn’t mention a particular savior), I didn’t do it at the top of my voice. Of course, that was because no one was getting in my face - probably because neither he or I had filed for a permit to talk on the street corner (the folks at college had to), I would probably start moving again as soon as the walk signal lit and I kind of have the countenance, manner and raiment that certain people associate with a crazy, degenerate person (that’s what some friends try to advise me of, at least). I did however do it loud enough that he and his entire entourage looked at me quite hard.
Yeah, I also flip people the bird on the freeway when they drive like assholes. I’m probably going to die in a bloody fashion, but there’s no reason to live in fear. Plus, I just gotta get it off my chest sometimes. If some day I suddenly stop posting here, you know what probably happened. Check and see if anyone got shot, stabbed or beat to death for being needlessly confrontational in DFW. If that didn’t happen, check and see if someone got shot, stabbed or just plain beat to death while breaking into a Chick Fil A on a Sunday in order to make a sammich while loaded on hallucinogens. If those didn’t happen, I dunno, use your imagination.
I really do have some sense. I swear I don’t go off at the mildest provocation, I might curse like I have tourettes, but I usually am nice. I don’t usually take strong hallucinogens on Sundays. But I just can’t help yelling back at some idiots, which includes flipping the bird in my physical vocabulary.
Back in my table-waiting days, I was left those as tips more than once. I wouldn’t have minded if they had left some money as well, but nope, just the tract. :mad: I’ve heard that they even have one that looks like a bill, so a waiter will think they got a tip, but no, it’s one of these mini-comic books that is unintentionally funny (sometimes).
It’s not the kind of Christianity I believe in, that’s for sure.
If you changed the target of mockery from “jesus” to “allah” or any other religion, would you and everyone else in here still be mocking it?
I seriously doubt it, and that is my problem. There would be posters hammering the report button and posters trying to get the offenders banned for hate speech and whatever else horseshit the weaklings can think up.
Mohammad was a pedophile, if he existed at all. Allah is just a second rate god, just as fictional as any other god. And the 72 virgins you get for becoming a martyr are all ugly guys.
Mormonism is stupid, assholes believing in the ravings of a proven con man.
Jehovah’s Witnesses are stupid, basing their religion largely on Revelation, a book clearly written under the influence of desert mushrooms
Scientology is just fucked up beyond anything, and if you believe any of this bullshit, you are also fucked up.
Now what was that annoying mutated mockingbird saying about not mocking other religions? You’d think it would get tired of being wrong all the time.
Dumbfuck, I just told you that I heckled what was most likely a Nation of Islam preacher on the streetcorner. I have problems. I’ve also told persons that I’ve known that I’m certain were Muslim that I have 0 time for that nonsense. Do you really think a Jew or Hindu really tried to convert me? It wasn’t pushy, and he knew that I was a joker, but I really did say “I’m sorry, but I think your god is a foolish god” over dietary restrictions to a Muslim when the conversation veered to religion. We were friends, and we were in the safety of the US, and were friends afterward. Some people can take it.
But, mind you: I’m also the person who says things out loud that I honest to goodness thought I was just thinking. Once this was “Plus, I don’t give a fuck what you think”. So, you must remember that not everyone around you has their conscious, rational mind in the driver’s seat the whole time. Sometimes the deep, dark insides just decide “nope, things just got weird, we’re running things for a few minutes until stuff has settled”. Sometimes you’re really ashamed when that’s over, sometimes your proud, and sometimes you’re dead.
I’m pissed off by the uptight dipshit Muslims that murdered people for making cartoons they found offensive. Though that’s a massive tangent from this thread.
Of course now I’m getting banned according to you.
I would just like to take this break in the action and say this has been a really great group session, I got a lot of stuff off my chest and I feel a lot better. I’m going to finish my beer and go to sleep.
Friend, if you ever feel the need to freak out over any particular religion or faith-tradition, even mine, you can hit me up. I promise not to take it personally. Hell, I might even join you in the gripe, even about mine if it comes to that.
The weird thing is that this guy keeps talking about his white ass as if it’s something special. It isn’t. 7 billion+ people have asses, and something like 800 million are white, and therefore have white asses. Globally, it’s as common as being left handed. A little statistically unusual but nothing special. So his ass is white, big deal. Him and 800 million other people. ::: yawn :::
What’s more weird is that me making a statement (once) and then repeating in contextually (once more) bothers you so badly that you felt compelled write such a oddly specific post.
You don’t bother me, you amuse me. You make me laugh because you are so ridiculous. You are a momentary distraction, like the latest report of crazy coming out of Florida or some other place.
We are mocking you, chuckles. We are laughing at you. You think you’re being annoying but you’re not. You’re just another another anonymous wannbe troll lurking on the internet. Sort of like a mouse crouching by a baseboard thinking he’s unseen but really, the rest of us are watching you snatch at crumbs like they’re something precious instead of forgotten motes were were unaware of shedding at the time they dropped. And for the moment you’re a bit of entertainment and diversion.
In the end, I expect you’ll overstay your welcome or do something objectionable and be swatted away.
I seem to have only encountered the more harmless variants over the years, that give up easily and politely. I think I may have seen off one evangelist by giving him a radiant smile and saying: “Thanks, but I’m already a Christian.” Well, that is stretching it a bit, but I was baptized and have never bothered to change my highly nominal status.
I find Broomstick’s reply really neat. Some of the others, though, are straight from the playground.
Seriously weird; encourtering a Japanese JW in japan. She spoke no English, my Japanese was and is minimal. For once I was glad of the language barrier.
Less weird: running into two archetypal young male Mormons while vacationing in Kyongju in South Korea. Two round-eyes in neat brown suits on a street corner. They asked me if I was lost, and they helped me find my hotel. We chatted a bit, they were friendly and not obnoxious, but we mainly kept off religion.
Still somewhat weird: two female Polish JWs came to the door. I live in Poland, and the place is seriously Catholic. As in: the local priest makes a visit just after Christmas, accompanied by two choirboys, and dispenses a blessing and some rather kitchy religious pictures, usually a bleeding heart Jesus. But he never stays long enough for me to take the piss out of him, unfortunately. anyway, the JWs spoke no English, and my Polish is minimal. But what made them into JWs, I ask myself. There’s enough religion over here as it is.
Maybe this is one for Californians, but do any of the new religions trawl for new members? Japan has a number of new religions that are more or less based on Buddhism, such as AUM Shinrikyu (I saw them a few times and town and thought they were seriously loony but harmless. The first was true, the second was not.) Other parts of Asia have much the same, thing, including China’s Falun Gong. India supplies gurus aplenty, and you have offshoots of Islam such as Bah’ai.
Regarding Islam, in Europe they do quite a bit of preaching, but they mainly target Muslims. So this tends to be the more extreme forms of Islam such as Salafism and Wahhabism. The occasional Westerner who converts to Islam is often the keenest missionary. Same as someone who has just discovered Christ, IMHO.
I’m all for religious freedom. I want to be free of someone else’s religion.
