I can honestly say, if I run into an old friend, I cannot imagine thinking about my hair. Do people really do that?
I’m a guy, but have learned the odds of running into an old friend are directly proportional to how big of a slob I look like. Also, the sloppier I look, the greater the odds the most gorgeous, nicest person in the world will get in line right behind me at the grocery store.
The stereotype in my house is certainly not true.
Me (female): ten-minute shower/hair wash, grab some clean clothes off the back of a chair, get dressed, brush my teeth, run my hand through my hair (it’s short and doesn’t need combing or styling), put my shoes on, and I’m ready.
Spouse (male): Minimum twenty minute shower. I swear he goes in there and sleeps. Shave, brush teeth, put in contact lenses, go through various face-washing rituals…it’s a wonder we’re out of the house an hour after he starts getting ready.
To his credit, though, he hates being late as much as I do, so he’ll usually start getting ready with enough time to make it to wherever we’re going. The only time he doesn’t is when the time doesn’t matter (I want to get out of the house earlier, but nothing earth-shattering will happen if we don’t so it’s really no big deal if we leave half an hour later than I hoped).
We don’t do formal stuff, so don’t really have any kind of gauge on how long it takes to get ready for that.
But do these pants make my butt look big?
Yep. You have to gather up each leg gingerly so as to not put a hole through it, get each leg on and if it’s control top that takes an effort. I mean, it’s only a few minutes, but not instant.
I’ve lived with two male partners (not at the same time, obviously). Both reliably take way longer than me to get ready to go out. I think it’s because they both use a lot of bath products that I don’t, which (a) takes more time in the shower, and (b) requires a lot more moisturizing after the shower. Also, they shave more than I do.
I dated a guy who shaved his head every day and (at non-headshaving times) it STILL took him longer than me to go out (I have a lot of uncooperative hair). I don’t know what the hell his problem was, there was nothing for him to adjust in the mirror.
It is only fair of me to point out that it took me over 40 minutes yesterday between the first time I opened the front door to leave, and the time I actually did manage to depart for the grocery store. I kept forgetting stuff! And the weather kept changing its mind! And I STILL managed to go out without my gloves!
One time when I was a kid, my dad pestered my mom about what was taking her so long to get ready. She was trying to put tights (little-girl pantyhose) on me (which she described as being akin to trying to put tights on a windmill). He asked what was so difficult about it. She suggested he give it a go.
I never had to wear tights again, after that.
What’s “little-girl” about tights? I’m 36 and I wear tights…
To which I invariably reply: “No, honey. The pants don’t make your butt look big. Your BUTT makes your butt look big.”
No wonder she left me. 
I also wear tights, and am wearing some right now. But I have never seen “pantyhose” for a little girl, they’re always called “tights” in my experience and I was going for clarity.
I cannot imagine the horror of trying to thread a little-girl-windmill into a pair of pantyhose. Og forbid.
I like and tell my girlfriend we have to be somewhere about 30-45 earlier than we really do. That way we’ll get there about 15 minutes early. I hate being late with a passion. Just the thought of being late makes me angry. After a few weeks of being late because of her, I just started lying.
Really, it has helped a lot. I’ve accepted the fact that no matter how long in advance she starts, she WILL be late. It’s in her nature.
I don’t think they make pantyhose for little kids. I just don’t see why you called them “little-girl pantyhose” when they’re tights. Everyone knows what tights are and will get why there is a similarity in putting them on. If you really needed clarity, you could say “(similar to pantyhose)” or something. Just struck me as odd, that’s all.
Maybe because she was responding to the question about pantihose taking a long time to put on. She was showing why her comment about tights was relevant to the question, since tights are the little-girl equivalent of pantihose.
which is why I suggested saying they were “similar to pantyhose” to get that point across. I don’t think they are “the little-girl equivalent” of pantyhose–they’re a separate clothing item and one which is not little-girl specific. It’s like calling a shirt a “little-girl sweater”… sure they both have a torso and two arms and you put them on the same way, but they’re different, serve different purposes, and both adults and children wear them.
I am nearly always ready before Mr. S.
I generally decide on what I’m wearing well in advance of an event, so I don’t spend time dillying on that. I don’t wear makeup, and I can only “do” my hair in a few different ways. Quite often my hairdo involves simply wearing a hat.
Mr. S doesn’t dilly over getting dressed so much as the final stuff before heading out the door. I can be standing there with my coat and purse, ready to go, for five minutes while he finds his glasses, oops they’re dirty gotta clean them, where’s my cloth, OK now where did I leave my watch, are my keys over there, gotta put lotion on my hands, did I lock the back door, gotta grab a box of Kleenex for the car, do I have my inhaler, oh here’s my phone, have you seen my comb . . .
I swear he’s a walking advertisement for why men should carry purses.
Oh man. If I had to add up all the time I’ve spent waiting for my husband to get ready, it would boggle the mind. He’s indecisive and needs opinions on everything he wears. He loves to dilly-dally, talk on the phone, and sip a cocktail before heading out for the night. He will literally wait until the very last second to get dressed. I am the complete opposite of all those things. Pick an outfit, put on a little makeup, and get out the door.
He will also hand me a dozen things I’m supposed to stuff into my little purse. Yeah right.
Sometimes it’s like I married a woman.