I find that kinda gross. My ex-boss used to stare at my crotch when I was in his office. It was really obvious when he was sitting and I was standing. He looked directly at my crotch for about half of the conversation. I felt really dirty. I never had cameltoe or wore anything tight that would make it even interesting to look at it. It makes my skin crawl thinking about him looking there.
Not that I think you’re gross for doing it. At the time, I had recently lost 80 pounds and was finally thin, so I wasn’t used to any male attention and he was the first person to do that to me and it was very odd and uncomfortable. Plus, he was disgustingly obvious about it.
My boobs though? I don’t mind if someone looks there once or twice (aside from the ex-boss). It’s especially nice if someone does it twice because it means that I was good enough for a second helping!
That’s one of my pet peeves with those things known as “women’s magazines.” If you listen to them, women with short legs should try to make them longer; women with long legs should try to make them shorter; women with big tits should try to flatten themselves and women who don’t even need a trainer bra should wear plastic-filled push-ups. And if you are the owner of a butt, you do not exist.
I swear, what happened to “flaunt what you’ve got”? Those subhumans want us to hide what we’ve got and flaunt what we don’t!
I’m serious about the “butt-attention problem.” In the most extreme case, I told a guy “ok, listen, if I turn around for a moment then turn back, will you be able to talk to my front?” " :o :o :o Uhm… was I being that obvious?" “Like an elephant in a subway.”
You know, I honestly had no idea that women looked at guys’ crotch bulges. Well, my ex did with me and mine, but she was a fluke in so many ways that I just can’t superimpose her foibles on the majority of womankind.
I suppose I should get to dustin’ off my running shorts and tight jeans…
Not that I recall, though I’d be terribly embarrassed. It’s not even a sexual thing, really, so much as me having discovered one day ‘Wait a second– I can see your junk! Its outline is totally visible through your pants!’ Now I can’t help but check.
I don’t think women talk about it as much, and aren’t as obvious. But a friend’s wife once confided that she and her friends did. And Pepper Mill recently told me that my baggy jeans didn’t do me any favors by hiding my butt. So evidently Good Girls look, which I find encouraging (and flattering. One woman told me once that I had good legs. On the other hand, she was a lesbiian. On the Grasping Hand, that means she was probably sincere.)
As a happily married man, I certainly never notice the body parts of any other woman. However, if I were the type, I’d be the unfortunate sort who would much rather notice a woman’s legs and rear instead of her cleavage, which is a really difficult thing to do when having a face-to-face conversation.
“Uh, hey, look behind you, quick! There’s something really interesting going on over there!”
Lady Dopers: What do you think of a guy who looks at your cleavage?
Depends…is he good looking?
Seriously, My answer has already been posted a number of different ways. Bottom line, don’t be creepy
While I admire your take on it I wouldn’t be so sure about this if I were you. I went to school with girls who did everything but Sharon Stone’s Basic Instinct move to get professors to notice them.
I figure he isn’t a tit man for whatever reason, or that my particular tits don’t do it for him–no big deal either way. My SO has these weird blinders where he can’t seem to see gorgeous women–unless they’re blonde. Put Juliette Marquis or Catherine Zeta Jones next to some run of the mill blonde and he’ll see the blonde, but not the bombshell next to her. It’s tunnel vision of a weird sort…
Besides, just because men tend to be more visual than women doesn’t mean that there aren’t an infinite number of points along that continuum. Some guys have what appear to be fishhooks embedded in their eyelids that are automatically attached to any female that walks by, others barely notice that there are women around at all unless one thwaps him in the face with a bare boobie–most guys fall somewhere in the middle!
I think one of the sexiest things in the world is a guy wearing a pair of well worn jeans, not really tight but that fit nicely, who wears his package in the same spot so there’s that ever so slightly more worn patch right where Mr Happy rubs around all day–gahh, that’ll give me a slight drool problem…
Now that I’m breastfeeding and actually have cleavage, I can answer this question! Maybe it’s the novelty of it, but I enjoy people looking. And I’m having fun wearing clothes that accentuate it. Don’t know if I would say the same if it was a life-long scenario.
(Not to hijack the thread, but I’ve always wondered what women think of me, a lesbian, noticing their cleavage. I had a young woman working for me a couple of years ago with seriously gorgeous breasts, and she wore clothes that beautifully showed off her cleavage. Work appropriate, but still very nice. I felt like the dirtiest old man around her, because I could hardly keep my eyes away… although I did my very best to be professional. Made me more sympathetic towards straight men, I’ll tell ya!)
I go with the consensus here, if I’m wearing something that shows off boobs or cleavage I don’t mind someone taking a quick glance or two. But no staring.
I’m straight female and I can’t help glancing at other women’s boobs myself but part of that is because I’m short and they’re usually at eye level. I try to look elsewhere.
In summary;
A quick glance or two is okay.
Staring or leering is not.
Reaching out and grabbing them in both hands and saying “honk, honk” is right out.
I always figured that, in any given male-female relationship, there comes a time where you’re both familiar enough with each other that this action becomes acceptable if done sparingly.
After ten years of marriage, my wife has made it perfectly clear that “sparingly” means only once, ten years ago, and for no longer than twenty minutes.
Honestly, I notice crotch bulges far too often for my own good. Guys, if you’ve got “weird looking” junk (or junk that’d look weird in tight clothes), don’t wear tight clothes. I don’t want to be able to tell if you’re circumcised and hung like a doorknob. It’s just not pretty. Really, sometimes it’s just amusing when someone’s got a visible issue with their pants, but mostly I don’t care unless it’s ungodly huge or ungodly small; in those exceptional situations, I often mentally point and laugh. ::shrugs::
As for the cleavage thing, I’m totally oblivious. Unless you’re talking at my breasts or making the wrong kind of face while doing it, I probably won’t notice. I try to cover up my boobs, but let’s face it: unless I’m wearing something that has a collar that hits just below the collarbone or higher, my cleavage will either be ever-present or threatening to appear at any moment. I’m completely aware that my boobs are enormous and difficult to hide and don’t need to be reminded.* If you’re ugly or just creepy, don’t be obvious about looking at my boobs. It’s mean but true.
[sub]*I must admit that, as a teenager, I was more amused when women would stare at my chest. On occasion I did notice that the main reason was because t-shirts with text would be placed exactly in the “naughty zone” of mid-breast. Every now and then, though, I do see the “shocked and amazed” look on a female; however, I tend to be much more skimpily dressed when that happens.[/sub]
Why would I dress like this if I didn’t want you looking at my boobs? Sheesh. Boobs are supposed to be decorative – ask any AA-cup woman who has nursed children, and she’ll tell you they don’t have to be that big just to work. Human women evolved boobs to attract attention. You really are meant to be looking at them.
Boobs, however, are not for talking to. I have ears for that, and they are up here on my head, on either side of my face. Once we are through having a conversation that requires both of us to actually be paying attention, you are welcome to continue taking quiet, polite glances down my shirt. I don’t mind.
If you are following them like some sort of awkward, boob-seeking missile, then you’re just creepy. If you’re creepy, you’re not allowed to be looking at them anymore. They’re mine and I revoke your boob-glancing privileges.
Like the rest of the women on this thread, glances are good, a stare is much less so. Though in all honesty, being oblivious, I probably wouldn’t notice a stare 90% of the time.
I sometimes worry that the women around me think that I’m a lesbian checking them out in a creepy way. I can’t look at people’s eyes (it hurts), so I try to either look at their foreheads or chins when conversing. But a lot of the time, I accidentally end up looking at the chest instead. :smack:
I remember a picture of Sophia Loren, who as we all know isn’t exactly flat, at a dinner where one of the people at the table was an American blonde actress (Jane Mansfield?) with even more curves. In the pic, Ms Loren was definitely checking out the blonde’s cleavage, with a sort-of-pissed look on her face… 'tain’t only people who are, shall we say, “interested in them” who notice boobs.
One of my mates in a SCA-style group down in Miami had curves that would have made a feathered boa take notice…
