A family friend who taught Latin for many years is currently battling breast cancer. I’d like to send her a card with something appropriate inside in Latin. Preferably something funny, clever, or cute, as we’re not particularly sentimental, but I’ll consider anything you think might be good.
Thanks in advance for any ideas.
I took Latin in high school, but cannot remember much these days beyond “Arma virumque cano”.
Well, the one joke every 14 year old in Latin 1 liked was “Semper ubi sub ubi.”
The teacher will get it, even if you don’t.
(Well, we WERE 14 year old boys, for Pete’s sake- don’t look for sophisticated humor!)
Hm, I’m not thinking of any great quotes at this late hour, but if you needed something translated, just post it and I (or any of the other Latin-type-Dopers) would be happy to render it in the language or Caeser.
Well, this isn’t Latin but a story joke from the old Flip Wilson TV show.
Did you know the ancient Romans were avid berry pickers? Well, one day, Herman the Roman found the most perfect berry ever. He decided to put it on display and Herman charged admission to see the perfect berry, and express their admiration for it.
Herman got rich at this, rich enough to marry. He gave his wife title to the berry as a wedding present.
One evening there was a knock at the door, after hours for berry viewing. yawning in fatigue, Herman the Roman went to the door to tell the visitors to come back tomorrow. “Go away” he hollered, but now there was a pounding on the door.
He opened the door and there stood a group of men armed to the teeth. In a trembling voice, Herman the Roman tried to tell them that his wife’s berry viewing hours were over.
They laughed in his face. Said the gang “We came to sieze 'er berry, not to praise it!”
Baker: That was bad ! 
Eonwe: Thanks, you’re so nice.
Oh, you give me an idea! You know how they always say to wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident and end up at the hospital? I bet I can do something with “Semper ubi sub ubi” if someone could make it “say”* Always wear clean underwear…
*Yes, I know it doesn’t really mean that.
Roman humor is something of an acquired taste. “Cute” is not usually a word applied to even the greatest Roman humorists.
I started looking at Horace and Martial, but nothing sprang out. Can you be a touch more specific as to what you are looking for? Perhaps a particular theme you need a clever phrase about?