Lavendar militia

The BBQ Pit
1

[Sauron]

There are many people who believe the gay high school in New York is bad or wrong or unnecessary.

This is all nothing but a bunch of poppycock.

This was a necessary and long-overdue move. And even this is not enough.

What about gay kids in other states? What about gay kids whose parents won’t let them go to such an institution?

Gay people are bashed, beaten, and tormented every day. Kids die - many from their own hands, out of frustration because of what they have to face on a daily basis.

In Our opinion, the only other solution would be to create vigilante groups to hit back at gay-bashers.

The Lavender Militia - we’ll rearrange your living room and your face.

We are half serious. The way some kids are treated makes Our blood boil - no child should have to go through that during their childhood!

And “diversity training” and “diversity seminars” won’t help. The idiot bigots will still go out and torment gay people.

Now, this does not necessarily mean that being gay is right or okay. These kids aren’t tormented because they openly proclaim their gayness - they are hurt because they behave in a gay manner, or at least not in a typical male fashion.

Otherwise we’ll need to depend on the Lavendar Militia to bind the hands of idiot bigot gay-bashing nincompoop Neanderthalic sub-human demonic spawns of Hell that were rejected and spewed from the gates of Hell because even Satan could not tolerate their abominations.

[/Sauron]

2

The title should say “Lavender” not “Lavendar.”

Could a moderator be so kind as to change this? Pretty please?

Thanks!

WRS

3

Some women are gay.

4

But are lesbians tormented as much as gay men/boys are?

Society is more tacitly accepting of lesbian behavior - especially since women are physically more close than men are - than gay male behavior.

WRS

5

Ya know, I stopped using a sig eons ago but this nearly made me change my stance.

6

I agree. We need to do more.

I suggest that we begin by making such gay high schools mandatory in all states and all communities. They’ll be voluntary, like the one in New York at first, but once the gay people see how it’s in their best interest, they’ll understand when we make it mandatory.

Not only will this improve lives for gay students, it will vastly improve the lives of the heterosexual ones, who won’t have to put up with icky gayness in their school buildings. Since gay people are the only teenagers who ever get picked on or made fun of in school, I expect that once the segregation is complete, there will be no more teasing, violence or cruelty in any school in the country.

Of course, we’ll need to establish some gay colleges too. We can’t expect these gay folks to adjust to life among the normals when they graduate high school, can we? That would be ridiculous. After all, they’re gay, and unable to cope.

So once these fine upstanding gay citizens graduate from college, we’ll need to establish some gay-only businesses and careers for them. Gay people should, for their own protection of course, not be permitted to work alongside our heterosexual brethren. I suggest that instead of attempting to maintain seperate business units within companies for gay and straight people, we simply cordon off a section of each major city with a big wall. Behind the wall, we’ll set up public housing for the gay people (since they wouldn’t be able to get a mortgage or lease, being gay and all) and put them to work doing menial, gay jobs.

Attempting to escape from the gaytto will be punishable by death.

I can understand if you can’t really see the Big Picture just yet, but we in The Establishment have big plans. This gay high school is just the beginning.

As for the bisexuals, we can put them to work in the coal mines.

7

“Take cover, men!”

“Where?”

“Behind the rosemary and sage sconces… or those delightful festive throwpillows!”

8

And then when we’re done with that, we can build the world’s biggest slope, and pour olive oil all over it.

9

I adore you.

10

I adore you.

11

I was thinking something more like KY-jelly, but whatever floats your boat.

12

I adore you.

13

Weird double post.

:confused:

14

You’re about 30 years late.

15

Would this be the “underground with lots of dark corners where you could get a little privacy for snuggling” kind of coal mine, or the “rip up a huge chunk of the earth with draglines, D-10’s, and other big machines which have big potentially comfy cabs for snuggling” kind of coal mine? I’m trying to plan my schedule, and I need to know this sort of thing.

16

I was thinking more like searing heat, black lung, radon-poisoning with pine coffins provided as an employment benefit kind of coal mining.

But I guess you could cuddle in those teeny tiny train cars.

17

Teenage lesbians are tormented plenty.