“You’re not as fat as you used to be.”
You’ve got to love those people. I just smile at them so big while I’m mentally stabbing them with my pencil.
Your handwriting is so neat, it’s like you’re right-handed!
Back when I was successful in my Weight Watchers regime, a co-worker referred to me as “a shadow of my former self.”
Theres always the old For a fat girl you don’t sweat too much.
Then statistics show about 9 percent of the population is gay. And 9 percent of the population is left handed. Nice that god makes it so easy to pick them out.
“Those pants don’t make your butt look nearly as big!”
To me, the funniest ones are the ones where the person catches themselves right before they say it.
Someone once told me I was “light on my feet,” and I actually heard her throat clamp down as she tried to go on to say, “for a fat guy.”
I got something similar:
“You’re much bigger than I thought you would be.”
Thanks…I think.
You’re so well spoken…
Your d*ck is much bigger than all your friends’.
At one of the very few thin periods in my life I heard this from my niece. She was 18 at the time, so should have known better. It was 1987.
“Aunt Cat you look so thin!”…then she whispered in my ear, “You don’t have Aids do you?”! 
:smack: :mad:
A friend was being hit on by a co-worker. Later, at a party, my brother-in-law sees the guy and his wife.
“My God, did you see how ugly is wife is? No WONDER he hit on you!”
I once was told by my landlady, “Your hair looks so good! I saw you the other day and I thought, that can’t be her!”
Um… thanks?
My then step-daughter was looking at some of my old high school pictures and exclaimed " wow you * were * really hot, I would have dated you! " She caught what she had said and grinned and said " don’t worry Mom still thinks you’re hot "
Sigh.
I’m sorry, I must be dense. I recently reached my goal weight after losing 27 lbs. Why would this be considered a left-handed compliment? I WANT people to notice the new me!
I think it’s the emphasis on the large amount of weight lost.
Sort of the equivalent of, “Hey everyone, remember how FAT he/she used to be!”
LOL!
I had a roommate in college who thought she was beautiful and therefore was so stuck-up she could never get a date. Then comes me - comfortably curvy, dating someone steady long distance, and yet always with a bunch of guy friends calling to hang out.
“Guys must love hanging out with you since they don’t have to worry about you starting to like them or something.”
OMG :smack::smack: :eek:
2 smacks and an eek!
I hate that one! Cause you can just fill in the “for someone who looks so dumb . . .”
I am posting to say that this is the quintessentially typical parental thing to say (though in my personal case I’d expect it from my father not my mother)
When I saw the title of the thread I wondered what kind of compliments are given to left-handed people (such as myself) because I have never received one (except indirectly, when people say things like “Lefties are better cricket players”) But I am flattered when somebody at least acknowledges that I am left-handed.