Lefties suck!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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      • Well, not really.
      • Bottle makers don’t seem to like them, though. In the soap aisle at the store, I see only two product bottles that have handles on the left side: one size of Shout stain remover, and the whole line of Febreeze fabric deodorizer (a product whose purpose I am still contemplating). All others with handles have the labels designed so that the handle is on the right side when the front label is visible. Some products come in round jugs where the label was put on any old way and the handles point in all directions, but since it isn’t intentional, those don’t count. And there is the baby bottle with “handles” on both sides (with the hole in the middle), but that ain’t really either, it’s both. Anybody seen any other left-handed bottles? - MC
  • “If we were polar bears, you wouldn’t say that!”
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Does it matter if you are looking at the front of the bottle or the back while you are pouring it?

If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
Harry S. Truman

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OK, MC, I can no longer control myself.

I have been reading your posts for weeks and weeks, and I kept asking myself the same question. However, I thought it to be way too trivial to ask. And perhaps it is completely normal in your neck of the woods, and my asking would expose me for the dumb foreigner I am… (Insert “Awwww NO Cold, you’re pretty smart - for a foreigner !”-reply here).

It is getting too much though. I must ask it.

MUST ASK MC THE BURNING QUESTION…
MUST ASK MC THE BURNING QUESTION…
MUST ASK MC THE BURNING QUESTION…
MUST ASK MC THE BURNING QUESTION…

OK. Here Goes.

DEAR MC. WHAT’S UP WITH THE DASHES YOU KEEP USING IN ALL YOUR POSTS???

There. The word is out. Enlighten me.

Coldfire

“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
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I don’t know why the jug-makers do that. Never really occurred to me, but then, I’m a rightie.

What I’d really like to get my hands on, though, is a MagnaDoodle for lefties. We gave my almost-3-year-old daughter a MagnaDoodle for Christmas, and she adores it. But the pen that comes with it is attatched by a string, on the right side. I appreciate the thoughtfulness of attatching the pen, but my daughter is a leftie, and the string gets in her way. Anyone know if they make these?

“The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his ribcage.” --anonymous redhead

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Here are some other things that are totally unfair for lefties:

Many camcorders and microscopes
Tabbed dictionaries
Can openers and potato peelers
Those electronic signature pads now so popular with UPS.
Pencils
All sharp objects (since our parents/ teachers aren’t dextrously-equipped to demonstrate to us how to use them without cutting our fingers off)
Manual Transmissions
Just about any type of computer equipment ergonomically designed to prevent carpal-tunnel syndrome.

There’s more, but it doesn’t all come to mind right now.

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About 15 years ago, there was a magazine called “Lefthander.” It was by and about lefties, and every month showcased some famous lefty–don’t know if it’s still being published, though.

Anyway, it frequently had ads for various “left-handed” tools and doohickeys. Kinda interesting.

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At the advanced age of 45, the only item I’ve come across whose righty bias has seriously bugged me is the computer keyboard.

This is because of the numeric keypad on the right. I’d love to have it on the left; my right hand can barely manage to hit ‘backspace’ without hitting the ‘insert’ key instead (and often fails that, flicking me into overwrite mode, dammitall).

If they’d only make a lefty computer keyboard, with the number pad (and the insert/delete/… keys and the arrows too) on the left, that would remove what I find to be the only significant irritant of being a lefty in a righty world.

Now don’t get me started on going by my middle name in a first-name, middle-initial world. But that’s another thread…

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Where? Where’s the thread? Count me in. You’re not alone, RT.

Oops. Sorry about the hijack.

“The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his ribcage.” --anonymous redhead

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My brother is left handed and I am right handed.

He taught me to play pool so I play like a leftie would.

I am the systems admin for his company and he uses the mouse like a rightie does…

Now go figure.

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Mjollnir, I remember Lefthander magazine. My aunt got me a subscription years ago. In my opinion, butter knives were the worst pain, but on the other hand, I took to driving in Japan much easier than my husband did.

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Let me add two more items, both of which I ended up learning how to use right-handed:

Guitars (and probably all other stringed instruments). I understand that Joan Baez (sp?) learned to play a guitar left-handed by using a right-handed guitar upside-down (so that the bass strings were nearest the ground), but I simply learned to play mine right-handed.

Bolt-Action shotguns - if you try to use one left-handed, the bolt action is on the inside (right next to your face) - and the spent cartridge heads straight towards your cheekbone.

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One thing I can’t understand is, how do 80% of British and Japanese people feel about manual transmissions? I mean, if the cars are (unintentionally) set up for lefties, what does everybody else have to say about it?

On the other hand, I’m not quite sure why stick-shifting is considered more handedness-intensive than steering. Or why something as presumably simple as adjusting focus on a microscope would require the correct hand.

Actually, I think a lot of companies sell bolt-action rifles just for lefties. One thing I’ve never seen, is a revolver for a lefty. The only exception is (unintentional as usual) the old 8mm French Service revolver, which was designed to be held in the left hand while reloaded with the right. It’s a cavalry thing that we peasants wouldn’t understand (I tole ya it was an old revolver).

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Now that I think about it, top-break revolvers would probably be pretty easy for a lefty. Even ambidextrous autoloading pistols would be kind of annoying, since the ejected case would fly across your line of sight.

Just how “handed” are people anyway? I mean, what’s the big deal about the handedness of scissors? Can’t you just switch hands? This has always been a curious thing for me; I’ve never had a problem with something like scissors. I think everyone should strive to be more ambidextrous. Although I think I’d have real trouble with a stick shift on the left…

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Boris: I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty sure I was taught how to use scissors. They are a common enough tool in our world that I think most young kids receive a demonstration (from a righty) in how to use them. So we cope, for the most part, with that.

Re: Microscopes and camcorders. I wasn’t referring to the focus knob. I was referring to the positioning of the eyepiece. For most people, the dominant eye corresponds to the dominant hand. I am going to take a WAG and presume that eyedness is something you can’t be trained out of.

Golf Guy: Yes, the shotgun experience sounds pretty uncomfortable, BUT

I’ve never been able to understand why stringed-instruments are considered left-handed. Having spent years playing the cello and string bass, I always found fingering to require more precision than bowing.

I do have to give Microslop credit for one thing: Windows accessability options include a lefty-friendly switch. Not only does it make it easier for me to work on the computer, it provides countless hours of fun while I watch helpless, ignorant, moronic righties try to figure out why a menu pops up every time they try to point and click.

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It’s over here, Cristi. Come join in!

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      • Because it’s an easier way to indent paragraphs and insert “blank” lines than typing html/ubb code for [non-breaking space] or [line return]. No great conspiracy.
        -(Well, it also has something to do with something related to Ruda Duda, but I don’t know if I’m authorized to tell you about that.) - MC
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Okay, I’m a leftie and do everything (except play golf) left-handed. I don’t see the big deal.

I am in no way equating lefties with people with no arms, but watching a show like “Dateline”, where some woman does EVERYTHING with her feet, makes me think that I can stand to left-click a mouse with my middle finger or use the numeric keypad on the keyboard. You just learn to do it. No big whoop.

And that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong.

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Dew,

You can, if using Win 95/98 change the settings for left handers in control panel > mouse.

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you ‘lefties’ whine too much. be strong, like flanders.

i can see a few products being annoying, but come on… left handed soap bottles?

us right-handed people seem to manage just fine typing with our left hand.
so quit complaining about keyboards.

blah blah blah.

what is essential is invisible to the eye -the fox

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Melatonin
I hadn’t thought about the “eyedness” aspect. I suppose this is because I don’t really know whether I’m right- or left-eyed.

My scissors point was that I don’t know why it is considered economical to make left-handed scissors. I can comfortably use either kind of scissors, and I can less comfortably use either kind with the wrong hand, just by reversing the pressure to make sure the blades stick together.