i will soon be marrying my children’s father. the horse has been pushing that cart for way too long. we will be spending 5 days in jamaca while my parents watch our kids.
my question is this:
i want to make sure my parents have custody in case anything should (og forbid) happen. it should perhaps be noted that i am the only parent on the birth certificate for both kids.
can i just write something up and have it notorized? or do i need to find a lawyer right quick? i’ve never left them for so long or so far away. i just want to not be stupid.
You need to consult a lawyer because laws vary from state to state. The normal practice is to have a will (an excellent thing to do with your upcoming marriage) that will specify your intent for guardianship of the children. Although this could be legally challenged, most states give very heavy weight to provisions in a properly executed will.
Will or no will, the biological father can contest the disposition of his children if he so chooses. Just because he didn’t sign the birth certificate does not mean he’s abdicated his parental rights.
However, you can’t go wrong making your wishes known, either with a formal will or a notarized statement (if time is an issue). Also, make your wishes known to several friends and family members verbally.
IANAL & IANAD, but I have been a chaperone on many youth trips and had to give medical consent in the parents’ stead.
If you mean “in case something happens to the kids” then a notarized letter giving your parents the right to make medical decisions on behalf of the children will be sufficient (think of the feild trip forms you complete for school outings). The letter should name both grandparents and all kids, state that either grandparent can make give any and all necessary medical consent for any of the named children beginning date XX/XX/XXXX and ending date YY/YY/YYYY or until your return.
If you mean “in case something happens to us” then a will is the answer.
IANAL Whenever I leave my daughter with her grandparents I write a medical consent form and leave it with her insurance card. I don’t have it notorized, but then again, I also have a will that IS.
Here’s what I write (in general):
To WIMC:
Our daughter, Her Name, will be staying with her grandparents, Their Names, while we are on vacation from date to date. In case of emergency we authorize Their Names to make any and all medical decisions for Her Name.
Her Name has no known allergies or illnesses and is insured through Insurance Company, policy number Number. Her pediatrician, His Name, can be reached at His Number.
If you have any questions, we can be reached at Hotel Name, Hotel Address, Hotel Phone, My Mobile Phone or His Mobile Phone.
Thank You,
Our Signatures.
I’ve never had any problems (thank god) and my parents (PharmD and RN) were the ones who first requested this so I generally feel that it wouldn’t be a problem.
