Oooh. So, my “IKEA Name” would be EGPN?
METASCHLEFF
Are you looking for something to store your excess of IKEA bookshelves? This METASCHLEFF stores up to eight IKEA bookshelves and their contents. Assembly required.
FULDUR
Perfect for holding up to twelve letter size pieces of paper. Fits easily into a FILEKABNET. Assembly required. (tools included.)
funny stuff so far but I have to say I have been very happy with the IKEA products I have bought! I got a queen sized sofabed a few years ago that my kids have used on a very regular basis since then and it has worked like a charm. I also got a few chairs that are quite nice, a king sized down comforter that I was VERY impressed with (I am going to go lay down on it in a moent:)), but there is one item that stands head and shoulders above the rest:
their paper napkins. Ikid you not, for like a buck and change you can get 50 of the best, most absorbent, strongest and generally all around great paper napkins I have found. I drive the 45 minutes just for those!
As some have alluded to, there is some crap there but a little careful examination will steer you right.
Chipboard can be your friend. As a matter of fact, I see no chipboard perse there but rather MDF* which is used in even the finest cabinetry applications for it smooth surface, excellent machinability, superior fastener retention, and better than average water resistance (certainly much better than plywood)
There is quite a bit of solid wood furniture there, more than I had intiially expected. Look for the quality of the fasteners and stay away from the absolute lowest price stuff there and you will be pleasantly surprised.
- medium density fibreboard - look it up on a google search for more info. It is the primary ingredient in the German cabinetry my company imports and sells and our kitchens start at 50K and go up quickly…trust me when I say it is great great material and I will NOT go back to plywood (ugh)
Almost right. It stands for Ingvar Kamprad, Elmtaryd, Agunnaryd.
Ingvar Kamprad is the founder and still runs the company. It might interest you to know that he was an avid supporter of Adolph Hitler during the thirties (see this BBC article).
Elmtaryd was the family farm, located in the village of Agunnaryd, in south-eastern Sweden.
I love this! Of course, as flodnak can tell you, It’s actually freakin hot in Scandinavia in April/May/June.
I arrived in Oslo on May 10, and it was 25 C.
Also available in black. Approx. 2.5" x 2.5" x 14"
And also, be sure to pick up:
SKALD
Non-stick pan. Utilized state-of-the-art “heat transfer technology” for fast cooking. Perfect for frying up dinner! Diameter: 12". $14.99
FLIMSEE
Foldable cardboard magazine holders (Does not fit TV Guide). Portable. Set of 3 $2.95
Lazarus and the Gimp-
Thank you effusely for the LAFF.
If anyone did not enjoy LATG’s hunk on IKEA assembly.
LAFF - Add a little zest and spontaniety to your MESSIGB0RD (sold separately, see pg.42). Useful with a complete set of P0STRZ and LURKRZ(pg. 69). Check stock before ordering, This is a custom order piece. Priceless.
SPØT
End those lonely nights with our lifelike four-legged friend. Perfect for chasing the blues away (and prowlers too - thanks the optional motion-activated RÜÜF module). Convenient side compartment for storing LEESH and BØWL (sold seperately).
I love the jokes, but I gotta go with MikeG – I do the Ikea thing pretty frequently, and while their stuff isn’t the best, it’s inexpensive and IMO generally a good value for the money. As long as you’re careful about what you’re buying, they seem okay.
Out of curiousity, there seems to be a fair amount of anti-Ikea hostility floating around. Is there any particular reason for that?
BIERKASSE
Our exclusive line of economical furniture, designed by a college freshman at UC, Santa Barbara. Manufactured from 100% recycled material - mostly aluminum, cardboard and glass.
BIERKASSE - Coffee Table
Base is reminiscent of a pony keg of Schlitz. Top is compressed cardboard. Optional glass tabletop available in green, brown or clear. Requires GLEW for assembly. $499
BIERKASSE - Plant Stand
Stand is made from 95% recycled aluminum. Tiered shelves are compressed cardboard. Shape is reminiscent of the Great Pyramid at Giza. 4’ tall, yet surprisingly lightweight. Requires GLEW for assembly. $129
BIERKASSE - Ceiling Fan
Driven by same powerful motor as in HEIRDREYER. Blades are aluminum with cardboard cores. Control speed with DIMMÜR. $329
BIERKASSE - Entertainment Center
Cardboard TV stand has cardboard and glass frame. Styling by Budweiser and Miller High Life, special to IKEA. Supports TVs up to 13" or 12 lbs. Optional aluminum foil antenna ($14.99) for improved TV reception, or purchase CAYBLEKLEPTØ tool ($47.99) for crystal-clear picture (coaxial cable not included). Optional side shelf ($129) holds video game consoles up to 3.5 ounces at a 36-degree angle to the floor. GLEW and GÄDGET required for assembly. $1299
I worked at IKEA as a cashier for a hate filled 10-months several years ago. As a cashier, I saw just about every product that was sold at the time, and still, to this day, cannot forget the item numbers for some of them, like the bag of 100 tealight candles – 80080880. IKEA cashiers back then rung every product by hand, now they have scanners. We also had to stand through every shift, now they have stools. I am only slightly bitter about this.
Anyway, it was clear to us back then, as we rang up SKRUB toilet brushes and FLOFF stuffed bunnies, that the people who named IKEA products had a sick sense of humor, but that was never more clear than when people started coming through with four different – though coordinating – dining chairs called JAHN, PAL, JORG & RYNGGO. We weren’t sure whether to laugh or be very, very afraid.
ROFLMAO! My IKEA Name: LEWD. I am not making this up.
…you know, the ones that are served in the $2.55 lunches in the cafeteria> My guess is that the wood scraps from making the furniture are mixed with concrete and molded into these little balls.
Bet ya can’t eat just one@
Don’t forget:
CLAUS
Our other four-legged friend, and the reason we make KOVERUPP slipcovers for our TORTUR sofas. Comes covered with FURR in several colorways. Accepts optional MEOWZ and PURZ modules (sold separately). Perfect for decorating the top of our many lines of bookcases (not compatible with other decor items in this usage, except for RUBBERBRIK and BOWNCYVASE, sold separately; bookcases also sold separately). Convenient side compartment for storing MAUZ and BOUL (sold separately). Requires LIDTERBACHS and POSST (also sold separately). Note: Not compatible with BERD (sold separately), unless BERD is stored in KAGGE (also sold separately).
CLAUS w/ short FURR. . . .REDUCED THIS YEAR . . .$49.99
CLAUS w/ long FURR. . . . REDUCED THIS YEAR . . .$59.99
A little thing you might find interesting - in Sweden all the IKEAs are actually red, not blue and yellow.
Actually, I correct myself. One of the Stockholm ones (Kungens Kurva) is being renovated and now sports the international blue/yellow look on the new section, although the old red entrance remains.
Coming to think of it, you might like the Kungens Kurva one. AFAIK it is the only IKEA without a set route you have to follow. You can actually dive in to look at the sofas without having to go through kitchen stuff, bathroom stuff, garden stuff …
You’re in danger of insulting a lot of people there. “Köttbullar” are, more or less, the national food here. Personally I love the things, but maybe they just don’t get made with the same ingredients elsewhere.
I’ve never been to a foreign IKEA, do they serve them with “lingonsylt” (like a jam) elsewhere?
Yes, yes, they do come with the lingonberry preserves, which alone is reason enough for a nice plateful. (Although my local IKEA, in Elizabeth, NJ, charges well more than $2.55.)
Actually, the last couple of times I made the trek I found myself buying much more from the food shop than anywhere else. Lingonberry and cloudberry preserves, biscuits, chocolates…
Much more reliable than the furniture.
FÄLSIG - by popular demand, they are now selling the fake plastic computers, stereos, etc., which are used in the home and office furniture displays.
Its fun to throw those things at people.
Man, all these product names sound like:
l33t.
Sorry. Continue.