These days, both men and women tend to bring a dowry. They live on their own for a few years before getting married, so they have stuff from before they were married. That stuff helps them in setting up a household together, which is the original purpose of a dowry. I would assume gays generally live on their own and accumulate stuff for at least a few years before they get married, so they have a dowry. When I was about to marry Mr. Neville, I referred to my stuff I had gotten before I got married as my dowry.
When Mr. Neville and I moved in together, we actually needed to cull our stuff more than we needed to get more stuff. We had two of a lot of the things we needed. I’m wondering if a pre-wedding yard sale or trip to Goodwill is one day going to replace wedding gifts (or at least non-cash wedding gifts), now that most people getting married don’t actually need more household stuff.
If teh gheys bake cakes, we’ll all get even fatter. Eventually, this will cause the Earth to crash into the Sun.
The real reason is that it messes with somebody’s database. We’d have to hire a bunch of programmers to figure out which programs same-sex marriage creates a problem with and solve it, like we did with Y2K. Some haters think IT people having jobs is a bad thing. But it keeps us off the streets, and keeps us from experimenting with things like liquid oxygen. I guess that puts firefighters out of work.
If you allow homosexuals to marry, they will then feel less pressure to stay in the closet. With less pressure to stay in the closet, they’ll be less likely to marry an opposite sex partner. With fewer of them marrying opposite sex partners, fewer homosexuals will reproduce. With fewer homosexuals reproducing, teh gay genes will be lost. When teh gay genes are lost, there will be no interior decorators left.
I linked to a really great article on this very topic in my first post to this thread. Apparently, the problem is called ‘Y2Gay’, the databases that cope with it are ‘gaytabases’, which are accessed using ‘Structured Queer Language’.
… and it’s puns like those that mean gays can never marry!
Also, if gays can marry here, all the Queero Mexicanos will be coming here and becoming illegal gayliens. That might cause Lou Dobbs’ head to explode on air. Will nobody think of Lou Dobbs?
And if all the gays come out of the closet, we all know there will be more room in the closet for wire hangers! And when that happens, eventually we will be over-run with wire hangers. Won’t someone think of the landfills??
Cmon. Who will the people whose sole achievement in life is marrying a person of the opposite sex have to look down on, if gays are allowed to marry? Won’t somebody think of the useless?
Just because somebody’s allowed to get married, doesn’t mean you can’t disapprove. Lots of people look down on people who marry their cousins, or who get married very young, or who marry ugly, poor, or otherwise undesirable people.
