Let's plot the next SUPERMAN movie!

Cafe Society
1

Bryan Singer seems to think he’ll get a sequel to Superman Returns greenlighted, and though this belief may just be a hallucination brought on by caffeine deprivation, let’s assume for a moment it’s true. Let’s also say that that the studio execs (influenced no doubt by certain digital photographs in my possession showing them engaging in unlawful homosexual congress with underage middle-eastern communist yaks) decide to turn to the Teeming Millions to write the story.

What would you like to see, Dopers?

I’d like a couple of things myself. First, no Luthor, except as a cameo at most, and no kryptonite whatsodamnever. I mean, Superman has MORE THAN ONE ENEMY, people, and it’s easy to overuse those little green rocks. No, I want a grander villain, an opponent who doesn’t have to skulk around looking for hunks of a dead planet because he just doesn’t need to.

And I don’t mean Brainiac, either. I want Darkseid.

(I know what you’re thinking: Skald just wants to title the movie Superman: Apokolips. Well, maybe I do. So what?)

Second, given the propensity of comic-book movies to retell stories already told, I’d like to suggest the specific plotline to steal: the “Apokolips Now” storyline from the Superman animated series of the mid-90s. That story, you’ll recall, featured

  • Superman fighting gangsters using alien technology, with Metropolis cop Dan Turpin watching and Turpin’s boss, Maggie Sawyer, wounded in the battle;
  • Darkseid yanking the gangster’s strings from behind the scenes;
  • Orion arriving on Earth to warn Superman of an imminent invasion from Apokolips;
  • Orion saving Superman’s butt in the first engagement with true Apokoliptan forces, but, mistakenly thinking the danger over, clearing out, but leaving Superman with a interstellar pager to summon him back in case of danger;
  • Darkseid beginning his real assault by destroying a nuclear power plant so it will create a firepit on earth;
  • Superman fighting an army of parademons, just barely stopping the firepit from forming, and getting his ass handed to him by Darkseid himself;
  • Darkseid parading Superman in front of the people of Earth to break their spirit;
  • Dan Turpin rallying the people of Metropolis to fight back against impossible odds, only to be murdered by Darkseid as he retreats.

I’d keep most of this story. Replace Maggie and Turpin with Lois and Richard. This gives Richard a good exit (Superman doesn’t have to become the other man, nor Lois an adulterer). The story would have to be tweaked by so that there is some way for Superman to save Earth himself, rather than the literal deus ex machina* of the New Gods as in the original. But the image of Superman, an instant too slow to avenge his friend, helplessly and furiously trashing Darkseid’s enormous tank, is great…as are the last words of the episode.

They’ll never do it, of course.

Anybody have another idea to share?

*And what the hell is the plural of deus ex machina, anywhistle?

2

I saw the title of this thread on the main screen and Darkseid was my first thought. I also agree that there shouldn’t be another movie with Lex as the main Big Bad. I mean, it’s been done four times already. I wouldn’t mind seeing a movie adaptation of the Death of Superman storyline.

Just please no Mr. Mxyzptlk.

3

The thing is, they’ve already done his death & resurrection Returns. Singer’s already intent on making Superman Jesus; must we make him Buffy as well?

4

Throw in a giant spider and a couple of polar bears and you just might have something there.

5

Clones. Lots and lots of clones.

6

I’d prefer Brainiac to Darkseid.

How’s this for a plot: Brainiac comes to Earth and shrinks Metropolis for storage ina bottle before anyone’s even aware enough of the threat to stop him. Decent chunk of movie spent struggling to get Superman out. Once Superman escapes the bottle, he discovers that Brainiac also has a Kryptonian city shrunk (amongst a whole collection). Emotional conflict - Superman feels some obligation to both Metropolis and his birth-home. Sub-conflict - with no Krypton for the Kandorians (just to pick a city name at random) to return to, the only place they could go if Superman defeats Brainiac would be Earth. Can Earth handle for a city full of Kryptonians?

Potential setup for next movie: throwaway scene in which Brainiac amuses himself by watching alien gladiator fights of his own arrangement, with Mongul as one of the participants. Superman’s ultimate defeat of Brainiac results in Mongul’s never achieving the prize he had fought so many battles for - he’ll have to battle Superman to establish his reputation amongst the galaxy’s strongmen.

7

I like maybe half your idea. Briainiac’s shrinking device is a bit hokey; besides, I think it would be much more dramatic to see the entire island of Metropolis being lifted into the heavens (maybe with Superman plummeting to Earth, struck down by Briainiac, in the same shot). Likewise, I think the Superman concept works best if he’s the last Kryptonian, no ifs, ands, or buts, so I’d want the alien city to be from some other civilization. You could still call it Kandor, though.

8

Given a choice, I’d have them ignore that they ever made Superman Returns and all the prior films. I’d start over and base the movie on Birthright. Make the movie (plot) intelligent, give the characters more depth and believability, and bring the story up to modern standards so that a greater number of people will be able to connect with the characters.

9

Supes has to have a villain on par with him in powerlevel. We need actual fights not just flying around and lifting kryptonite islands.

10

Hence my choice of Apokolips. Parademons can fly, have super-strength, and various ranged energy weapons. True, no single parademon is anywhere near him in power–but 400 at once is another story. Particularly once they start biting.

And Darkseid, of course, is another ball of wax.

Another thing that occurs to me: Orion comes to Earth to warn Superman of the oncoming attack, but never intends to do the fighting for Earth; New Genesis is over-extended as it is. But he trains Superman in fighting against super-powered opponents…that might be cool. "Damn, it, Kryptonian, you’re not Jo Nah! Use MORE THAN ONE POWER AT A TIME! "

11

Skald:

I’ll admit it’s a bit hokey, but given the difficulty of giving the very powerful Superman a challenging villain, shrinking him down is a good solution, and having him need to use mental strength (which will work as a weapon for a shrunken hero in a way that physical strength would not) which to defeat Brainiac makes for a more original story than a slugfest (although there will need to be slugfest elements to play the movie to Superman’s strengths as well).

The city (who ever said Metropolis is an island? I always considered Metropolis to be more Boston than Manhattan. Gotham City is the more natural New York analog) could be lifted and then hit by the shrink ray, for the effect you suggest, rather than shrunk in situ.

But that’s already not true in Superman-movie continuity; the three Phantom Zoners exist.

12

The '78 feature makes it pretty clear that Metropolis is a stand-in for Manhattan.

Also I just felt like typing “the island of Metropolis.”

13

It’s been a while since I’d seen it.

I have a feeling you might have been picturing Fantastic Four # 242 being adapted to film. I have to say, it would make a great visual.

14

Who cares what the storyline is? Just get that butt-ugly broad out of the role of Lois Lane and put in someone who looks good and has some decent acting skills.

15

I was going to ask if you mean the issue in which faux-Dr. Droom pulls the Baxter Building into orbit and the Human Torch flies up after it, but I’m not prepared to admit to being such a nerd that I can identify the story of a twenty-year-old issue just from the number.

16

There’s a great Starlin sequence featuring Mongul and Warworld from the 80’s that is much better than any adaptation they’ve done using Mongul. I just want to see supes cut loose and hit him with heat vision destroying most of Mongul’s clothing before finally beating the living crap out of him. Plus, as a bonus you get to see war world destroyed piece by piece in this titanic struggle.

Not a plot but I don’t feel like looking th sequence up – I know that Hawkman/Starman II (The Starlin one)/and one other Hero guest star, but you can write around that the sequence itself is a great read as I recall. Starlin had some good stuff going back then.

17

I was referring to the one where Terrax lifts Manhattan into space and holds it hostage to make the FF force Galactus to free him.

18

for the record this is Skald’s sister. that was stolen from the old spider-man cartoon from the sixties.

you may now return to my brother’s latest silly discussion.

19

After Hercules made all that effort to tug Manhattan back into place with a giant chain, albeit with the ends in the wrong place?

20

Yep. Terrax is such an dick, you’d think he was from Krypton.