Y’know, Spike just isn’t all that. You get past the Bond reruns, and it’s pretty durned dull. Might be a money thing. Or maybe all the other cable networks snagged up all lthe good guy TV type programming. So let’s pretend we’re network execs for a new guy TV programming channel and you have unlimited money and can snag any program you like, current or out of air date.
Just one rule. No sports. There’s already four frickin’ ESPN channels or ESPN wannabe channels on my local cable network, we don’t NEED any more frickin’ sports programming.
I thought of this while reviewing some of my old videotapes for … reasons … and I discovered that I liked the action adventure series that used to be all over the cable dial back in the late 90s a LOT more than I like what’s on nowadays. So that’s where I’ll start.
Feel free to give reasons for your picks and to propose changes that would make a program work better for guys. But don’t get silly. That’s my job.
The Lost World (Jennifer O’Dell in a leather bikini WITH DINOSAURS. Really frickin’ hard to beat.)
Xena (I know other groups have staked a claim on this one, but really, hot fighting chicks in skimpy outfits … they could just be waiting for the right guy to come along, really …)
Cleopatra 2525. Hot fighting chicks in the future. Victoria Pratt. Gina Torres. Jennifer Sky. It’s like they had the FORMULA for hotness.
Birds of Prey. Put 'em in some skimpy, sexy outfits this time and turn ON the lights when filming. Also get Oracle outta the wheelchair. You can’t see her butt if she’s sitting in a wheelchair all the time.
Dark Angel. Jessica Alba goodness. 'Nuff said.
Adventures of Brisco County, Jr. Because hey, Bruce Campbell.
VIP Pamela Anderson brings her enormous talents to TV. Goodness for all.
There’s lots more, but this’ll do for starters.