Dateline 3/29/04 5:56AM EST
Viacom Plans to Start Gay TV Channel
Translation: Sell your stocks in the company (Disney?) that owns the Lifetime Network.
No announcement on a channel name, timeline or (for that matter) the almost endless programming possibilities.
Like most cable networks, I assume it’ll be a blend of:
Re-runs: Golden Girls, et al.
and
Original Programming: I’m not going to even tread here…that’s your job.
The original programming will probably suck - a lot. You’ll get a lot of shows based on network programs substituting gays and lesbians for straights .
Bad reality shows. Bad game shows.
They’ll end up doing for gays what the WB did for blacks when that network first started up.
Of course, there’ll be a couple of decent shows. Until they become mainstream and the network screws 'em up.
Whatever happens, I hope they don’t parade around “Queer Eye” type shows day in and day out.
Don’t get me wrong, “Queer Eye” is certainly entertaining, but we homos are much more than entertainment. I hope that this network will show that.
Okay there’ll be Soap, Will and Grace, and Ellen. There was Love, Sidney but I think they avoided acknowleging the lead character was gay in the series. But if they’re willing to go with closeted characters, it’s a wide open field: Frasier, The Odd Couple, Kate and Allie, Gilligan’s Island, Starsky and Hutch.
Ummm, how about a show with me, hosting old movies? Where do I get hold of these people?
And what might that be?
Actually, I meant UPN. I was thinking of the classic “Homeboys In Outer Space”.
It’s inevitable. There WILL be a show featuring horribly stereotypical homosexuals.
Big question:
When they get around to making original shows, will they hire only homosexual actors to portray homosexuals?
Perhaps they’ll use CGI to add gay characters to old shows. Now All in the Family rerun viewers will see Archie butt heads with Gloria’s significant other Rosie O’Donnell and see what happens on this week’s episode of Johnny Loves Chachi. The Queer Duck marathon will last for 43 minutes during the first weekend, followed by Cooking With Mizrahi, Shopping With Feirstein, k.d. lang’s Celebrity Harley Trips, Jim J. Bullock’s Safari World, Richard Chamberlain’s Oldies Hour, and for a touch of class The David Hyde Pierce Show (similar to The Actor’s Studio except each week his guest is either Cher, Liza Minnelli or Bette Midler).
PS- You may want to consider having this moved to Cafe Society as you’d probably have better turnout.
Is there a petition for me to sign?
Forget the petition, where do I send my resume to be your PA?
Gay, Happy Days?.
OK, I am so going to look into this . . . You may recall that AMC (before they went down the terlet) auditioned me as a movie hostess. I wouldn’t have to host only gay- or camp-oriented films (after all, stations are restricted in what they can get broadcast rights to). I can natter on entertainingly about any kind of film.
My only contract demand is that I get to open the show by sweeping into the room like Loretta Young.
Unsolicited advice: The early bird gets the worm. Print out the old resume and contact the Human Resources Dept. @ Viacom A S A P. They’ll either be impressed with the fact you read the press release in the WSJ or horrified by the fact you heard it on one of their radio stations that carries the Howard Stern Show. If they ask, tell 'em both: you’ll come off as well-rounded (or schitzophrenic). Good luck.
Tomorrow, at work. Wheels will turn.
Spin, too, probably.
Having spent many years reviewing Gay and Lesbian films at the Berlin FilmFest for the Advocate, I can assure you there is no lack of material. Every year there are some really great full-length films, as well as some good short films and documentaries.
This would be a good place for some of these films to find an audience.
Also, I am sure many of you will be shocked to know there are several Gay people who have worked on films, television sitcoms and dramas, and theater. My guess is there might be, oh I donno, maybe 200,000 people jumping at the chance to do projects that are close to their heart. If there was ever a marriage made in heaven - Gay Network and original programming sounds like a perfect match!
Moving this to Cafe Society.
Eve, tell them your online cult of devotees will all subscribe to their channel if they put you on the air.
Yeah, right, the same cheapskates who won’t shell out five bucks for a message board? Some big butter an’ egg men I gots.