Nah, I did a bunch of crappy experiments, used anecdotal evidence, wrote nothing down, lied about parts of it, then interpreted the results just the way I wanted them to be interpreted…just the way the Church likes it!!
“Dear Shiva…”
Points to the Colts. Already covered you there.
Though still waiting- maybe your God is a Raven’s fan?
Boggle, nobody likes the ravens.
Looks like I know where I’ll be next Sunday.
Cite?
I have been praying for the Rams for three years now. Either it doesn’t work or God hates me AND St. Louis.
Shit man, you don’t have to sully God by praying for that to happen. You need to prostrate yourself before Roger Goodell, Steeler fan extraordinaire, and pray to him and his master (Satan) to just add an extra zero onto the zebras paychecks just like you’ve been doing since 2005 and all your black and yellow dreams will come true!
So what’s going on this year? Did the Rooneys run out of money or something?
A hopefully relevant anecdote. Back when I was in high school, our guidance counselor/former basketball coach/former math teacher also served as the football team’s PA announcer (yes, it was a small school). Mr. Reed (RIP) was great for the job, as he had a booming voice, but he did tend to get a bit excitable.
The football team was having a bad year and it was a typically lousy game. I was sitting about three rows down from the press box and I could hear Mr. Reed grouse after every bad play. On the fateful play, the snap from center whistled past our quarterback. As the ball scooted several yards through the backfield, a groan came from the stands. Then, from the loudspeakers, Mr. Reed’s voice came out at earth-shaking volume: “PICK UP THE GODDAMN BALL!” Everyone froze, including all of our players. An alert opponent fell on the ball. It was so quiet we could hear the referee calling out, “First down, (opponent).”
Then we all burst out laughing. What else could we do? Mr. Reed never lived that one down.
The moral of the story: it was a cursed year. Even the football itself was god-damned.
When athletes thank God, they are not saying that God favored their team and cheated to make them win.
They are saying that God is a major factor in their life and everything they do, and playing sports is not an exception. Maybe their faith is the only reason they don’t sink into a deep depression and quit sports. Maybe their faith is the only thing that gave them the determination to come back after an injury.
If an athlete’s faith in God really is what gives them the strength to compete at their best, then they are objectively correct to credit “God” (the being or the idea) for their success.
Well the Ravens lost.
Ergo- the Christian God doesn’t exist, or he doesn’t take outside calls. But his son or Mohamed the prophet DOES mysteriously enough.
So I’m 2 outta 3 on the Prayers thing.
Too late, we’ve proven God doesn’t exist.
Next week: Shiva.
On deck: Huitzilopochtli
Hey hey- keep up here, I covered Shiva with the Colts (I’m Hindu :D)
He’s cool. We need to try someone else.
I vote Satan next week should be tried.
2 out of 3 with Shiva eh?
hmmmMmMmMmmmMmMmmmm…
No no no. I did 3 prayers, 3 diff. Gods.
- Colts- my own religious views (Shiva’s in there). -Still unbeaten.
- The Patriots losing- Jesus OR Mohammed i asked for either to cover for me. - they lost in a crushing blow and I got to see Tom Brady fall to the ground in shame and frustration and look all sad and pouty. That works for me.
- The Ravens- I asked the Christian “God” to cover for me. He failed to help me out.
Giants beat the Cowboys, so I held up my end of the bargain and went to church yesterday.
I guess there were too many people there praying for the Eagles, though. Looks like I’m sleeping in next week.
Hey. This is heavy duty shit we’re dealing with. I don’t think anyone is going to get any sort of results until we start sacrificing virgins. Or goats. Or virgin goats.
Another data point - I read in the paper this morning that Jamie Carragher of Liverpool Football Club regularly prays for his team to finish in the top four of the Premier League, and to do well in the FA Cup and Europa League. We’ll be able to see how that’s panning out around May 2010 (or, given their form at the moment, more like February :)).