Let's share bar exam stories!

A couple of my friends just passed the New York bar, which has me thinking about my own bar exam (Maryland, July 2009). Anyone want to share bar stories?

Mine is less a story, as such, than a confession: I genuinely enjoyed the bar exam. Both the prep and the test itself. I’m a sick man, I know. But still. Perhaps it’s because my last year of law school was really hard - I loved it, but it was difficult. My classes were difficult, the job search was stressful, and my legal clinic work veered between long periods of grinding research and short periods of absolute panic. My very last assignment for the clinic, right after graduation, was arguing before an Immigration Judge who’d already rejected every argument we’d briefed, leaving us with little more to do than beg the Court for mercy - which my client did not get. A hard year.

Compared to that, I found bar prep to be quite restful. I moved out of my group house into my own apartment (for free - I was petsitting for the summer), and was able to finally set my own schedule. If I wanted to go to video lectures, I could do that - or I could go to workshops, or watch the videos at home. I could study in a nearby coffeeshop, or blow off studying to go walk in the park nearby - I know bar prep is supposed to be stressful, but I hadn’t been this relaxed in a while. Besides which, I actually learned some new law - I’d only had a glancing exposure to family law in school, for example.

Heading up to Baltimore the day before the exam was probably the closest I’ve ever come to a spiritual experience. As low-key as my bar prep summer had been, it’s impossible not to start to feel the nerves hit as exam day draws near. I was tired and scared when I went to Union Station to board the train. And then I got on, put on my headphones (Zero 7 is perfect train music), and watched the city turn to suburbia, then trees and grass. And the fear … it just left. The switch flipped, and I was fine. Just fine. You probably had to be in my head to really appreciate it - but this was one of the strongest experiences of my life, and I’ll remember it for a long time.

There was a certain black humor to checking into my hotel, and walking around the neighborhood looking for dinner. The whole area was flooded with exam-takers - clutching laptops or notepads, some wearing suits, some just with the pinched look of someone who knows there’s something vitally important they should be doing, but can’t remember what it is. You could wish “good luck” to almost any random passer-by, and get a genuine “good luck” in return - it was an instant pocket community of deeply worried people.

The test itself was surreal - roughly 1,500 wannabe lawyers crammed into a conference hall, with the head proctor’s voice booming out like Yahweh on Quaaludes. People babied their laptops, taking the greatest care to never bring their water-bottles anywhere even remotely close enough to spill. Technical glitches went from irksome to terrifying in seconds - I had a bad scare myself, and spent five minutes convinced I’d have to handwrite my exam. This would certainly have led to failure - my handwriting is horrible, and the graders can’t grade what they can’t read. But I fixed the problem, and the test began.

You can’t judge how you’re doing on the Bar while you take it. It isn’t possible - don’t even try. There were moments on the essay exam when I thought I was brilliant, others where I thought I was an imbecile - I’ll never know when I was right or wrong, because Maryland doesn’t tell people who pass how they did on individual questions. I could look up the sample correct answers from that exam, but I forgot what I’d written within hours of the exam itself. The worst bit wasn’t not knowing things, or even running out of time when one more sentence was all I needed - the worst was having time to spare, sitting back while all around me keyboards clacked, and wondering what the hell I was missing.

That was the first day. I left shaking, exhausted. I’d resolved to spend my evening studying, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. My hands hurt, my head hurt, and by then I was convinced I’d failed. So I went to the waterfront instead, and sat, and read. My hands stopped hurting, and I grabbed a burger. Then I went back to my hotel and slept, waking fitfully with the absolute conviction that I’d overslept.

The second day was the multple-choice test - easier, in a lot of ways. A multiple choice answer can be wrong, but it cannot be incomplete - the nagging fear of yesterday, that I’d written answer that would be right if I could come up with just one more sentence or paragraph, was gone. But multiple-choice brings its own torment to wannabe lawyers - we spend years, after all, training to find and exploit the ambiguity in almost any hypothetical, and argue it at length. Being asked to provide definitive, absolute answers is painful - the instinct to over-think makes every answer look equally right, or wrong, after a while. There’s nothing for it but to force yourself to go with your first instinct, forget your pencil has an eraser (I was tempted to tear mine off, like a much nerdier Cortez burning his ships), and move on.

At the end of the day, I drank. The bar was full of my bar exam comrades - some talking with friends, many silent and focused upon their drinks. That was me. I had a scotch, then another. Ran to catch my train home, had more scotch there. And I didn’t leave my bed for a good twenty hours.

The perverse thing is that part of me enjoyed all of this - the stress, the challenge, the limits. I left shaking, exhausted, and convinced I’d failed - but part of me wanted to go back and do it all again.

Virginia bar - miserable. You have to wear a suit to take it, but also sneakers because you are on a covered over ice rink. In Roanoake, which is a shit hole. And back when I took the exam they still had the law-equity split. I must say, knowing what a Motion Craving Oyer is has been so useful in my practice since.

I shared a hotel room with my law school buddy who was also going to practice in DC. We finished the exam, drove half way back to DC, and went and got plastered in Richmond and stayed there overnight. Fun times.

Really? You can use laptops?

Man, am I old.

Yah, I’ve heard terrible things about the VA bar - which is why I went for Maryland instead. (I figured that I’d be practicing in DC, so it didn’t much matter anyway - in retrospect, I probably should have bitten the bullet and taken NY, but oh well.)

In Ohio, examinees are sat two to a table. My tablemate walked out after the first break on day one and never came back.

There were also two VERY pregnant women near me. I kept expecting one of them to go into labor, and felt very sorry for them during the multiple times they waddled to the (thankfully nearby) restroom.

Yup, you can use laptops - but you need to install special (and buggy) software at your own expense, use your own machine, and the bar examiners disclaim any and all responsibility if your hard drive explodes in the middle of the exam.

There’s also an amusing technical issue - you’re meant to upload your exam answers over wifi. That doesn’t work so well with 1,500 people in one room, all trying to use the network at once.

I was so in the zone during the NY essays, that apparently someone was brought out on a stretcher right past my table, but I didn’t notice.

The next day I finished the first 100 MBE questions in an hour and 15 minutes, and went to take a nap on the Javits center couches. Except I hadn’t made any arrangements with a friend to wake me up, so I was paranoid of oversleeping the lunch break. So I got into this half-asleep resting state that was really strange, yet fun.

The one topic I didn’t prep for at all was Guardianships. Never had a class, and as test time approached, I realized I didn’t have time to learn it from the ground up, so I decided to just roll the dice and focus on other subjects. After all, what are the odds that there’ll be a guardianship question?

Pretty good, apparently. Question #5: huge-ass guardianship essay question. I just BSed it and forged on. Fortunately, the next question was a huge-ass Secured Transaction question, which I knew backwards and forwards.

Heh - I wonder how many people collapse during bar exams? And whether it actually varies by state? I know California and NY are supposed to be especially hard, but it’d be interesting to see if that has medical consequences.

Wasn’t the bar exam, but tangentially related: During my finals for Property, a guy a few rows over from me stood up and walked up to the proctor, threw his blue book at him, and said (and I quote) “Fuck this whoremaster shit.” And he left, never to be seen again.

My year (2005) they had, I believe, a pilot program for laptops for the VA bar (assuming that is what you took). I took it the old fashioned way.

Or it might have been a NY pilot program. I’ve successfully blocked out pretty much everything about the bar, including the knowledge, from my head.

I went into the bathroom where there was a guy sat on the floor sobbing. Also the year I took it someone a few tables away looked down at the paper on the first (essay) day, grumbled a little, got up and walked out as he had thought it was MBE the first day, essays the second. Bit of an overreaction IMHO.

Me too! Ok, the other person never showed, but there was slotted to be a second person at my table. They never showed. They are not many in this world that now the true luxury of the full table during the bar exam. Plus I was near the restroom, but not so close to hear the flushing. It was perfect.

I was going to study after the first day, get some review in and by really confident for the next day. Got home and had some dinner. Yeah, did not study.

Didn’t go drinking after the last day. I sat in the car and let traffic die out and then went home grabbed some things and joined my family for a few days of camping. THEN - I flew to Barbados and got plastered. (thank you frequent flier miles for the first class seats).

The exam never worried me, finding a job did. That took over a year and many who took the bar with me are still looking.

Yes, mine was the Virginia bar, back in the mists of time (the nostalgic 1980s).

Don’t feel too bad - I may have taken it in '05, but I was at least 50% older than almost everyone in the room.

Was it in Roanoake?

Mine was a long time ago in a Texas sports arena, but I remember a question laying out a product liability scenario and diversity jurisdiction issue regarding a gun manufacturer headquartered in “Detroit, Green County, Michigan.”

A geography geek then and now, I pondered for a while the ramifications of being a smart-ass, but finally wrote that I would probably double-check the pleadings, as Detroit is in Wayne County, Michigan.

No, Norfolk. Nice beach trip. :rolleyes:

You took the winter bar exam. I recall having to wear a suit in the summer in Roanoke and staying at a flea bit motel. Wearing a suit is what I found strange. I let myself go by not shaving the whole time I was preparing for the bar and taking it. It felt kind of strange to be wearing a suit and having a thick bushy beard.

I have used a motion craving oyer. I used it when opposing counsel didn’t attach a prime contract that was reference in the contract they did attach.

My practice is 98% federal law, and around 2% Delaware state law.

They don’t have the law and equity split in Virgina anymore? Man.

I took it in Roanoke. It was fine. I’m very good at taking tests, and this test wasn’t particularly hard; it was just long.

The only story I have is that during the lunch break on the first day I went to Friday’s with a guy I knew because we had been summer associates together. At one point we were talking about how attractive the firm receptionist was (very!), and he decided that he probably didn’t have a shot with her because she was out of his league. Which was true, but what I knew and he didn’t was that even if he could surmount that hurdle, there was another obstacle to their getting together – namely, that he had a penis.

–Cliffy