(the band) weren’t there
to entertain, but to
the relief of the fans
, Taylor Swift dropped by
and sold out the
ideals of rock and
tectonic plate theory. Her
crowning achievement, however, was
teaching Santos how to
do the cha-cha like
a champ. Taylor also
showed Santos how she
could transmute straw into
brains, and tin into
tardigrades. Santos was unimpressed
, as well as incontinent.
Lost in Africa as
we were, there was
a feeling of impending
abrupt narrative shift: the