the sheer hotness of
turkey, fried in oil
, basted in the finest
butter. But enough about
dessert. Let’s talk about
tonight’s entertainment: The Amazing
Summoning of Cthulhu ceremony
, scheduled for Times Square!
Dick Clark, Master of
His Domain, was supposed
to be sacrificed, but
since that requires three
virgins (now nearly extinct)
they settled for frying
demented clowns in sizzling
hexane. But while the
clowns fried, Dick Clark
mutated into a degenerate
named Ryan Seacrest who
inadvertently profaned Cthulhu by