Let's thwart some story lines! ;)

Let’s suppose that there were some quirk in a story–so it couldn’t end the way the real ending of a book/play/short story/TV series/movie has it. For example:
The Grapes of Wrath–Before they reach California, the Joads find out that Grandma Joad had a secret fortune and they are all heirs.
Invisible Man–The Narrator makes the acquaintance of Charles Drew, Ralph Bunche and Marian Anderson.
It’s a Wonderful Life–Potter’s bodyguard saw Uncle Billy leave the $8,000 in Potter’s newspaper and says, “Hey, Mr. Bailey, you left your money over here!”
Tom Sawyer–Tom’s real parents turn up, very much alive.
Dallas–Jock’s will is discovered; he willed Ewing Oil and everything else he owned to Patrick, not J. R.
Home Improvement–Brad got a job as managing editor at The Advocate; Binford Tools was acquired by a company that didn’t advertise on cable TV; Al decided enough was enough and puched Tim’s lights out
NYPD Blue–Sipowicz accepted a job offer from L.A.P.D., Rampart division :wink:

Honeymoon in Vegas: Betsy, let’s get married at City Hall.

Gone With The Wind: Ashley tells Scarlett, "I really lover Melanie, not you. Don’t waste your time marrying Charles or Frank… marry Rhett and live happily ever after.

That John Denver’s full of shit man!

Forrest Gump - When Forrest meets the kid at the end, Jenny says, “Yeah, I this is my son. His father will be home any minute now.”

Inherit the Wind - Scopes plea bargains.

Brian’s Song - He gets better.

The Empire Strikes Back - Darth Vader: “Yes, Luke, I killed your father. What are you gonna do about it?”

Fail Safe - They stop the bomber.

Mary Poppins - Dad fires Mary after reviewing the nanny-cam tapes.

Independence Day - the aliens are using McAfee.

[QUOTE}Jenny says, “Yeah, I this is my son.”[/QUOTE]

Wanna run that by men again, Gilligan? :slight_smile:

“If you drive an automobile, please drive carefully–because I walk in my sleep.”–Victor Borge

Wow, did I flub THAT one up!!

Wanna run THAT by me again? :o :o

Cheers–The Red Sox give Sam another chance at pitching, Norm goes to A.A., Carla joins a nunnery, Woody gets accepted to Harvard, and Cliff loses it one day, shoots up a 7-11 store, and is institutionalized for the rest of his life.

Magnum, P. I.–Magnum goes back into the Navy. (Oops, they did it that way.) :stuck_out_tongue:
Frasier–Eddie goes to the dog pound; Martin has surgery to fix his leg and goes back on the force; Frasier’s station is taken over by a conglomerate and goes off the air; Frasier marries Roz, Niles marries Daphne, and both move to Boston to go into private practice.
Gilligan’s Island–the countless number of people who visited the “uncharted desert isle” recover from their collective amnesia and go back to rescue Gilligan & Co.
Julius Caesar–The Roman Senate tries Brutus for his part in plotting Caesar’s death, and has him executed; the Senate then installs Lepidus as emperor.
Silas Marner–Silas, hearing a loud splash in the well, gets there in time to see Dunstan drown–and collects the gold coins so he can afford to leave Raveloe and his loom, and move to London. :stuck_out_tongue:
Moby-Dick–The crew mutinies, making Starbuck the captain and tossing Ahab into the sea–and the Pequod sails back to New Bedford intact.
Third Rock from the Sun–When the INS investigates them, the Solomons take the advice of the Big Giant Head and go back to their home planet–taking Mary Albright with them.

Some Shakespeare:

King Lear: Cordellia decides to humour her father, makes an act long speech about how she loves Lear, is given the whole kingdom, and, sensing their trechery, banishes Goneril and Regan. She takes care of Lear until he dies of old age several years later.

Romeo and Julliet: Romeo steps in a pile of horse manure on the way to the party, takes this as a bad omen and never meets Julliet.

Hamlet: Claudius comes across Hamlet talking to his father’s ghost, and kills him on the spot.

Eschew Obfuscation

Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan. The star ship actually does go to Ceti Alpha Six instead of Ceti Alpha Five. Or when they are checking out Ceti Alpha Five, the sensors don’t pick up any life signs, so they deem it worthy and test fire Genesis on it.

Pitch Black: the pilot does jettison the passenger section, and lands safely. The two pilots are okay but have no one else around. They fix their ship and leave before the eclipse, but have to go home and account for the death of all their passengers.

Charlie on Charlies Angels doesn’t hide, but invites the Angels over to his place for a four-some. They decide he’s a cheap womanizing bastard and keep their day jobs.

Well, I just watched That Thing You Do soooooooo: Chad doesn’t break his arm.

Dr. Zhivago: Thanks to his low-cholesterol diet, Yuri doesn’t have a heart attack and manages to catch up with Lara. She says “nice to see you, hon, but I’ve got a nail appointment. Let’s do lunch sometime.”

The Wizard of Oz – After they melt the witch, the Lion realizes he really does have courage after all, so he eats Dorothy and Toto.
The Sound of Music – Captain Von Trapp decides the Nazi’s aren’t so bad after all, so he takes the commission, and the kids end up as Hitler youth.
The Crying Game – It really was a woman.
Ben Hur – Ben Hur hires a better roofing contractor.
Soylent Green – Thorn follows his Sol’s body to find out what happens to him, and discovers that dead bodies get incinerated.
Dennis the Menace – One word: Ritalin.
Crimson Tide – The whole message comes through the first time.
Home Alone – When the mother gets back, she is met by Children’s Services, who tell her that her kid has been placed in the state’s custody.
Animal House – Dean Wormer gives the Deltas one more chance.

As the Harkonans press the attack against the Atreides compound, it begins to rain.

“Though I hate 'em, I’ll defend to my death your right to use smilies.”
Forward deployed until 18AUG00

Citizen Kane- the reporter does an internet search and finds out that ‘Rosebud’ is a common brand name for children’s sleds. His editor kills the story because it’s too boring.

Treasure Island: When Jim Hawkins and the crew arrive on the island and dig under the X, a piece of parchment says “Ha ha! I was only kidding.” Jim Hawkins et al. spend the rest of their life defending against lawsuits claiming fraudulent advertising.

The Maltese Falcon - When they finally unwrap the package, the principals in the story find a real priceless falcon, slap each other on the back and split the money fair and square.

2001, a space odyssey: Poole fixes the computer by getting it to play a game of tic-tac-toe against itself.

Alien: After the Alien bursts out of John Hurt’s chest, it looks like a soft and fuzzy teddy bear. Sigourney Weaver washes it and blow-dries its fur, and it becomes the ship’s wacky mascot.

Little Shop Of Horrors: Audrey II kills Seymour . . . yeah, I know, but since I hear the song every time I listen to the soundtrack I wouldn’t mind seeing it every time I watch the movie :slight_smile:

Mayor of Snerdville, the home of Mortimer Snerd

“I’m just too much for human existence – I should be animated.”
–Wayne Knight