perches on one of the rafters River Tam-style and watches, giggling
*Wakes from sudden unconsciousness (i.e. had to go out)
Oi, Malacandra, you’re standing in my beer! KA-POW
Oh no you don’t, missy! This be a unisex fight, y’know! Chucks chair leg at Kythereia
Wait a minute. I saw that film. She kicked butt…pssst, no-one say “Miranda”.
Enraged, I cry, “That’s IT - cartoon sound effects for the lot of ya!”
Attempts a “ka-pow” but it comes out as a “Wuh-Pah!”
Leaps over the bar and smashes the end off of a wine bottle… Brandishes it menacingly
Come and 'ave a go if you think you’re 'ard enough!
John,
Here in the commonwealth of virginia, fellatio is illegal - even between a married couple. And to purchase such experiences, well, lets just say you could end up performing them yourself at one of our correctional facilities.
ducks
(Ah, but you just said it ;))
goes into full crazed fighting-mode
Them’s fightin’ words! Seizes the unconscious Malacandra, still wearing his spittoon, and uses him as a battering ram to smash the bar out from under Sierra Indigo, who tumbles to the floor in an undignified heap. Pauses to grab a fifth of Wild Turkey and change the song on the jukebox to Saturday Night’s All Right For Fighting. Waits hopefully to see a girl fight.
You aren’t getting away that easily!
(Tips jukebox on Case Sensative, than positions himself in a corner facing everyone else.)
…You TURNED OFF Elton John? Oh, NOW it’s on. grabs board with a nail in it, advances on Quinn
crashes to the floor with a resounding OOOF. After being momentarily winded for a moment, struggles to her feet and comes up swinging. Not realising her assailant has retreated with bourbon in hand, launches herself at the first person she sees - Revenant Threshold
RAAAAAAR! Smashy time!
(Takes advantage of Revanant Threshold and Sierra Indigo’s distraction, sidesteps, picks up Case Sensative’s pool cue)
You can’t win! You just can’t win!
(Again winds up in corner with back to wall)
Can I fight a woman?..
Hell yes! Charges with nail-boardy-thing raised
<recovers from her headbanging>
Pardon me, lightingtool.
<Gives a Xena-like war cry, then grabs her Folding Chair of Swollen Pain and nails Malacandra in his manly jewels. Then pulls the jukebox off Case Sensitive, only to nail him in his wedding tackle as well, and pushes the jukebox back on top of him>
<tags Maastricht and goes to a corner>
Quick, bless the sinks!
<dunks KCSuze, Revenant and Case Sensitive>
No rest for the wicked, I suppose…
<bashes sagitta with the FCoSP until there’s a sagitta-shaped indentation in it>
Wanders in, looks around…
Leaves.
Returns with two pairs of brass knuckles, a six-pack of whupass and bubble gum.
I’m all out of bubble gum.
Here now, we’re all friends here. C’mon, give us a kiss –
Massive headbutt.
<Runs back in through the saloon doors and hurls a pie>
Get it? When come back…Well, it seemed funny at the time
<Grabs Askias brass knuckled fists and begins pummeling him with them>
That’s for not bringing any bubble gum and for not posting the continuation!
Oh, a wise guy, huh?
Makes Harborwolf and Baldwin play Larry and Curly to his Moe.