Yes, I’m running for office out here. And kissing a pig is one of those things.
http://www.wtap.com/home/headlines/102303284.html
I thought you all would enjoy seeing that.
If I told you that turned me on, would you still want me to vote for you?
I kissed a pig.
And I liked it.
I thought Dopers had a thing for goats or sheep.
It’s just human nature.
A little experimentation in exploring your sexuality is a natural and healthy thing. I salute you sir for having the courage to share this with us.
Just stay away from my bacon.
Did you put lipstick on it?
Oh, so the tongue was just about tasting. Here I thought the OP was just being slutty.
With apologies to Jill Sobule:
I kissed a pig, its lips were sweet
It was just like kissing pork
I kissed a pig, won’t change a thing
But I’m so glad I kissed a pig
That pig is adorable! That hardly counts as kissing a pig. When our local celebrities kiss pigs at the fair sometimes they’re big ugly hogs!
Now we know why the little piggy cried “Whee!, Whee!, Whee!” all the way home.
Hey, I didn’t choose the pig. I thought it’d be bigger right up to the point they brought her out.
But I think it worked out well. Great pig. And I got the best quote on the late news.
Grrrr. Now you have that song in my head. And not in the way you think, either. You see, a professional musician who’s also friend played at a friends wedding, and he covered this song. Only, he attemped to sing like a girl, but it came out like emo/pop punk, and I like that genre, much more than what I think he usually plays, slightly country-twinged 90’s acoustic alternative sort of thing.
Perhaps I should suggest he record it 
So you’re saying your election platform involves kissing pigs?
So, um, which one are you? Given that all three of the candidates ended up kissing it.
what is a county commissioner? some sort of local municipal government? why are the candidates affiliated with the Democratic and Republican parties? are local government elections normally partisan?
not trying to be snarky or anything - just that in Canada, party politics normally start at the provincial level, not the municipal levels, so I’m just curious
Each state in the US is divided into counties (and Louisiana calls them parishes I think, because I know someone will nitpick me). Florida, for example, has over 60. Each county has its own government, which is usually run by a board of commissioners.
The county government collects property taxes and sometimes sales taxes to fuel its budget and runs the school system for the county as well as fire, police, water, wastewater, parks and rec, and other stuff for all areas in the county, excluding those that have cities that provide those services. For example, Palm Beach County provides water for most all residents in the county, but the city of West Palm Beach has its own water plants.
Commissioners are affiliated with the Democrat or Republican parties, but the parties or their platforms are usually not mentioned heavily in the campaigns, beyond maybe a nominal “we’ll balance the budget” from Republicans or “we’ll clean up water pollution” from Democrats. Most campaigns focus heavily on local issues, the policies of the incumbents, taxes, or recent scandals.
County government is an intermediate level of government in between city and state governments. I have no idea why it exists, though I suppose there are some efficiencies to be gained by consolidating services among a cluster of cities. Most 911 systems are organized at the county level, for example, even though most of the responders they send out belong to one or another of the cities within the county. There is usually a county police force to cover areas not incorporated into cities, there may be a county ambulance service. I’m not aware of county fire departments, but it wouldn’t surprise me if they exist in more rural areas. School districts, sanitation districts, zoning commissions are often but not always run at the county level.
Maybe Johnathan has more of a clue than I why we need county government. A lot of people doesn’t realize that almost every American is subject to at least 4 sets of rules or laws – city, county, state and federal. And by “a lot of people” I mean Americans too.
So, Jonathan, how to you plan to address the accusations of bestiality, now that you’ve provided video evidence?
Northern Piper, I think the equivalent up here would be MPs. States divided by counties, provinces divided by electoral districts, and each MP/county commissioner has its own mini-staff–does that sound about right?
If “MP” = Minister of Parliament, that isn’t a good analogy. An MP would be more akin to an American congressional Representative.
Or am I misunderstanding “MP”?