Little fuckers with fucking fireworks

My name is jjimm and I’m a firework addict. I fucking love fireworks. A major reason I went to the Hong Kong handover party in '97 was to see two of the biggest fireworks displays in the history of the world. I love the things.

But I’m not loving them at the moment. Things are getting seriously out of hand in Dublin.

For a start, they’re illegal in the Republic of Ireland, except at an approved display. However, people get them all the same, they’re sold openly in street markets, and every Hallowe’en it’s a tradition here to have private displays. I don’t really mind this - I think it’s a good laugh.

Problem is, the people smuggling them in start earlier and earlier each year. And the firework fun started up in my estate about a month ago. At first, it was just a few whizz-pop bottle rockets and little firecrackers. But the bangs have got bigger, and have turned into explosions that are way, way bigger than anything I’ve heard before. The windows shook. The first one that went off made mrs jjimm nearly jump out of her skin, and the cat run and hide in a closet. It made a crump like a mortar shell landing. It is some serious ordnance.

And the little fuckers setting them off do so all night long, up to about 2 or 3 in the morning. Every 10 minutes there’s one of these massive booms. According to our Community Newsletter, it’s like “Beirut or Baghdad” in our street. It’s not quite that bad at the moment, though down my street last Hallowe’en really was like a war zone.

The main concern I have is that most of the people setting them off are under the age of 10, and are totally unsupervised.

Today, on my way home from work, a group of small girls of about 7 or 8 years old approached me with a handful of firecrackers and asked me for a light.

Last Hallowe’en two little bastards were firing bottle rockets at cars, including mine.

It’s annoying, it’s keeping me awake, but worse still, it’s dangerous to the kids who are out unsupervised with seriously big fireworks. Someone’s house is going to get burnt down this year, and some child is going to get seriously hurt, if not killed.

Where are their parents? Where are the police? Fuck knows.

Or maybe even Belfast?

:smiley:

There’s always a problem with the punks.

Call them.

Wait a sec, you’re saying people are setting off unauthorized explosions in Ireland?!

Begorrah! Who’d’a thunk it?!

That was a good’n, lieu.

I reccomend automatic weapons fire - keep the little buggers running - they won’t have time to set up a shot.

Clearly you’re not familiar with the Garda Síochána.

Yep jjimm they’re starting earlier each year. It’s been going for a couple of weeks around our way and our neighbour’s dog is in serious need of therapy at this stage. Having said that, I hadn’t noticed that the explosions were any louder than in previous years and we only get a couple of bangs per night (fnar, fnar). That will intensify as halloween gets nearer, of course.

This has been going on since time immemorial in Dublin. I was one of those kids who terrorised the community and I can’t see any resolution to this. You’ll have to grin and bear it or move to Dalkey.

By the way, you haven’t lived until you’ve tried to get a lit banger out of the hood of your anorak. Fun times

That sucks and it’s fucking dangerous.

Slight hijack - it’s October 1st (Chinese National Day) so it’s fireworks night tonight on the harbourfront … in one hour and counting.

That’s half the fun unfortunately.

I’ve moved away from this behaviour by moving into the city center but have experienced all jjimm has described. Nothing can really be done about it. One of the things we wanted as kids was a reaction from somebody, be it a home owner(some of whom we really crucified) or the police. A good chase was also fun and I see no reason why the gurriers of today are any different that I was. Actually they’re worse IMO.

yojimbo who most likely put the banger in manwithaplan hood.

Oh, so was I - but the thing was that it was a) time-delimited (for a week or two preceding November 5th in my case), b) I would never have shot rockets at anyone/anything c) we were a bit older and slightly more aware of the danger - I don’t think 7-year-old girls are that enlightened about the consequences of their actions, and d) the things they’re letting off round our place are really fucking huge. You’re probably going to hear a few near you soon. They’re like sticks of dynamite.

Nor have you lived until you’ve soaked a rocket in petrol overnight and have it go out of control and fly up your shirt… :smiley:

Yeah, it’s the same in London too. Little bastards. At least they haven’t cottoned on to the old trick I remember from school about putting lit fireworks in piles of dogshit. Bang! Splat!

Brian, I’ve only ever heard Yanks and Canucks saying Begorragh :wink:

whereabouts? im surprised i havent heard any so far, and theres plenty of lil bastards around my way (NW london)

slightly different from fireworks, find an old calorgas canister and place on top of a fire. stand well back and enjoy!

except for when your lying down 100 yards away and the fucking thing flies about a mile into the air and lands about 5 foot away from my head.

i loved my childhood

I have heard it said once during the 8 years I’ve lived here: my ex-girlfriend’s dad said it. But he was taking the piss.

Ah yes, the gurriers with their bloody illegal explosives .

I remember the time well, in fact it was a year ago tonight that I cam home to find that they had ripped the slates off my garage roof and inserted numerous rockets, bangers and assorted noisy flamy things with the desired effect of demolishing everything within and had poured petrol in through the gaping hole in said roof. When the police arrived there were four of them up there with firelighter and matches.
Luckily the gurriers feld the scene. They came back the next night for more of the same but were thwarted by the razor wire I had put up. I hope it cut all their fingers off, ripped their flashy runners and they all got tetanus.

The neighbour who called the plice for me that first night got a rocket through his letterbox the next night for his touble, which killed his dog.
Then the Gardai cam round to tell me that I had to remove the razor wire.
Great innit?

However, all is cool this year, because the Corpo have built a massive big wall now; it has to be at least 20 foot high and the top is capped in such a way that to get onto it the gurriers will have had to have graduated Spiderman School with a masters in pole vaulting. Hurrah!
Dalkey you say, manwithaplan?
South of the river?
Don’t think I’ve got the proper visa to buy a house over here.
Or the half a million it might cost, for that matter!!

Holy shit, curly, that’s appalling. :eek:

Jesus, I was never that bad or anywhere approaching it.

That’s amazingly bad cc

So shut up moaning jjimm. It could be worse;).