I got a call at 840pm from someone claiming to offer an internship for a chemistry position. The person seemed really eager, which doesn’t seem like something an internship provider would be. Plus I caught several of their ‘selling’ tactics so I knew something was up, you don’t need to sell internships.
So after I hung up I looked up the company and they recruit students to sell encyclopedias. Jesus, I just agreed to have a meeting with people who want me to sell encyclopedias for them tomorrow.
Should I go or just blow them off? I am not selling encyclopedias in summer for gods sake but I told them i’d go (I knew it wasn’t a legit internship since real internships don’t call at 830 and sound so eager) but my curiosity got the best of me.
Oh god, I can really have fun with these people since I have no desire to get this job. I can ask if they do random drug tests and ask if I have to take a polygraph before I get hired. Then I can ask if they have high ethical standards and when they say yes I can mutter ‘fools’. This could be alot of fun.
Can you use those papers to roll weed because I have to be honest, no one will buy these just for the info in them with that internet thing and all. But if you can use the paper for rolling joints I bet I can sell a dozen at the dorms.
This reminds me of the time I went to an "interview for manager of an “import/export business.” Complete and utter |3^££$#!+. I was young and inexperienced, so I had no idea that sales recruiters sometimes use tactics like this. It was a real eye-opener for me.
They billed it as a “group interview,” which covered some of the initial oddness. They herded about forty of us into a lecture room. It took over 15 minutes for them to get into any kind of specifics. When they did start talking about what they actually expected us to do we were already in a position where leaving would have been socially awkward due to the lecture-hall style of presentation, closed doors, and having several acolytes at the two entrances.
After twenty-five minutes or so, I found out it was an “import” business by way of importing the cheap perfume from France and the glass bottles from Germany. We would be “managers” in the sense that we were in charge of our own outlet. We were expected and encouraged to recruit others, starting with our families. At that point, I’d gotten fed up enough to leave.
This was my first contact with sales. My second, with Cutco, was significantly less deceptive, but the idea of selling to family and friends to get started was very weird to me. I quickly found that I am not a sales type and that many sales organizations have some of the hallmarks of a cult. I now know what to look for and avoid anything that even whiffs of sales.
At least Cutco was worthwhile in at least one way: I still have the knives.
Cover yourself in fake blood and then show up 10 minutes late. Tell them you had to take care of a “problem” but that you are really excited about the job. So excited you would “kill” for it.
I blew them off. It wasn’t a one on one meeting, it was a group of like 20 people and someone standing in front of the group talking about how great selling encyclopedias was so I didn’t get a chance to pull my pranks. Sad too, that could’ve been fun.
