Last night, my roommate told me the most disgusting story. I hope that it is nothing more than a derivative of an urban legend; however, searches on Snopes and other sites have rendered naught.
Supposedly, a woman in Maine liked to insert a lobster in her vagina for sexual gratification. Apparently, the lobster had mud shrimp (sic) in its intestines or something, and they grew inside the woman. (Sounds like a spiders in the hair story.) Anyway, the woman later noticed a brown and yellow liquid oozing from her vagina. She rushed to the toilet, only to discover that hundreds of little…critters plop out. She died and was later discovered in a state of decomposition.
WHAT THE HELL? Has this been on the news? This lobster “tale” sounds “fishy” (ha-ha), but I couldn’t resist asking the teeming millions.
This is yet another internet myth, and quite a disgusting one at that. It is not true. Did you hear me ? IT IS NOT TRUE. Sheesh, do you belive everything you here ? Come on, welcome to todays media, half of what they report is BS and the other half is about %50 lies. Learn to tell the difference. Lobsters and Lesbians, oh my ! Sounds like a crappy cable series. Come on, surely you have more intelligence than this ??
The edges of a lobster’s tail are pretty darn sharp. Think of the type of callouses she must have built up. I bet she goes to Arizona and squats on cacti, too. Her girlfriend could buy her a monogrammed pipe reamer for Valentine’s Day…
However, the use of lobsters for gratification apparently has some basis in fact. I have (I am very embarrassed to say) seen the photographic evidence of this, which made the rounds at my high school when I was a lad. (What can I say? We were, in every sense of the word “sophomric”)
“Every time you think, you weaken the nation!” --M. Howard (addressing his brother, C. Howard).
If it is the type of image I have, um, heard of, then the photographer took the front end of a cooked lobster (you can tell because it is red) and placed it so that it appears that the tail is inserted.