So the tourists are finally gone and Mrs.P and I decided we wanted some seafood…We get to one of the best places in town, I notice a new cook behind the line. We order, I crack my Heinekin, and the lobster comes out looking nice. I crack into it, dip it in the ol’cholesterol and munch. :eek: :mad: :eek:
I’m not some tourist geeking around with a camera, asking, “So does the water go all the way around that Island?”
I’m a local. And have been for my entire life. Furthermore I grew up on the coast. I know all the tricks of the trade when it comes to faking seafood. Don’t fuck with me. There are some idots out there who use a circular cookie cutter to imitate scallops by cutting up skates. There are other assholes who swap out real King Crab legs for Snow crab legs and say they are the same. But not you Mr.Fuck, you go beyond the threshold for smarmyness! You cook up a lobster that you know was already dead, and expect a local to think you just culled it from your tanks.
FUCK YOU AND THE PORTUGUESE FISHING BOAT YOU HIJACKED YOU LOWLY FUCKING BASTARD.
Fuck with a tourist if you want to, but labor day is over, the locals are back.
[grumble] thought I wouldn’t know the difference between eating a lobster that was alive before the pot and one that was dead…bastard[/grumble]
And besides, dead lobster is a breeding ground for all sorts of bacterial nasties. Even if they’re refrigerated right after they die, they could be harmful if eaten.
Rat the bugger out to the local Health Department, I say.
Yes, you can tell by the texture and some of the taste. The lobster should have some degree of toughness, and taste should have a slight nip to it.
I did not say the lobster should be tough
But firm, and nice. Yes, I got another one. I picked it directly out of the tank. I didn’t approach the cook, but I looked at him when he placed the new one in the steamer. I could tell he knew that I knew what he did. I mean geez, there were 8 people eating on the deck. He was not slammed, and the tanks had at least 400 lobsters in them. What some people will to to save a buck.
Yep the spinys are good down there. My wife and I stayed at a place for a second honeymoon where on the first night they grilled out on our porch - private chef - 4 huge spiny lobster tails:) with monstrous Tiger Prawns on the side.
So. Lemme ask this of some people who apparently know lobster. I’ve always wanted to boil the thing in butter, 'stead a the usual water. Can this be done?
Absolutely Unca! Don’t forget it’s butter i.e. Oil - essentially you’d be frying them. But yes I have seen it done in a Turkey Frier. The timing is much different, instead of 15-20 it’s like 8. If that. do a test with just claws first if you try.
As FairyChatMom said, when you cook crabs, they should always be alive. When you steam them, they MUST be steamed alive. It’s a rule that you always throw out any that are already dead. Eating a crab that was dead when it was steamed will make you very, very sick.
Actually, you can cook dead lobster if you kill it immediately before cooking it*. You slip the blade of a heavy knive into a small slot behind the lobster’s head, and split the entire thing in two. Suitable for baking or broiling the lobster.
Well, if you’re that concerned you can also kill your lobsters by sticking them in a pan and chilling them in a freezer for 15 to 20 minutes, so they just go quietly to sleep. So says Alton Brown, anyway.
Or (his other suggestion) you can just think of them as really big (tasty) bugs.
