On a recent flight to Chicago, I had the great fortune to be seated next to an absolute bombshell–with a personality every bit the equal. We clicked famously. During a sparkling conversation, we shared some cookies she had brought. I let her sample some jazz on my customized CD’s. She showed me photos from her recent vacation in Fiji. I gave her a kiss. Next thing you know, she’s taking my hand and leading me to the lavatory.
Blast my luck, but I simply could not figure a way to recertify my international standing in the Mile-High Club. We tried everything–and I mean everything. Finally, we gave up in frustration. Sure, I’ve done the deed on a 747 (not sure which configuration) and on an old L1011–both several years back–but for some reason, the designers at Boeing have decided to skimp on lavatory space, thus making transcontinental interludes all but impossible.
As I am counting on a repeat performance, your creative solutions–or your own experiences–are welcome.
A purely-logistical, assumes-that-realized-that-sex-in-a-toilet-ain’t-making-love-it’s-just-f*cking answer:
There was a place to sit down, right? I mean, this wasn’t some super-specialized, men-only, number-one only bathroom, right?
So sit yourself on down, maybe scootch your hips out a little so your lap sort of subsumes the bottom half of your abdomen and invite this Princess of the Skies to impale herself upon your vaulting pole. Personally, I’d recommend she take you in from behind, so that she’s facing the same direction as you, especially in cramped quarters.
Better luck next time.
Oh, and I believe that getting head while amongst the friendly skies is sufficient for recertification, but only if she swallows or if your last full membership was granted within 10 years.
I travel all the time - domestic and international. Anyone that does so knows the condition of the bathrooms on planes nowadays, especially in coach class where the child:adult ratio is much higher.
People are freaking animals in there. I almost expect to see a zookeeper come in from time to time to hose the place down. Children pee and poop on the floor, the walls, the sink, the seat, behind the set… Hell, adults do the same thing sometimes! I often find blood on the seat ( :eek: ), and the smell…I mean, I don’t see how anyone could have sex in those conditions, space or not.
I avoid the bathrooms whenever possible. I would have rather asked for a blanket to cover us and given her 10 or 20 orgasms manually while lightly biting her neck and caressing her thighs, tummy, and breasts. Much better than risking unpteen diseases in the bathroom for what I’m sure would have been rushed and unsatisfying sex.
No joke at all, but then I haven’t been in economy class since the mid-80s–with the exception of three flights, all of which were agonizing. Most of my flights are international or on corporate jet, and I highly recommend JAL and Quantas. Consider this: in first class, one often shares a lavatory with no more than 15-18 people if you know what flight to take. In economy, two restrooms must suffice for up to 200. It’s also rare to find many children flying international in first class. My experience on JAL in particular (to HK, Japan, Seoul…) has been uniformally excellent. Haven’t seen an “animal” yet and the service is top notch. Domestically, the 737, IMHO, is a big step down, but one must always be prepared. Scouts honor, you know.
See if your employer will upgrade your seating. Sounds like things suck on your end.
I always fly first/business class overseas when on work. In fact, by this time tomorrow I will be on a 777 biz class to London, then to Greece. If I pay for it myself, I fly coach. I have numerous business class upgrades, but am saving the miles up for something special.
