Here’s the scenario. I buy frozen dinners that I have for lunch every day. I buy 5 or more at a time, then keep them in my work freezer. Without fail, even though I have writing all over it, someone has been stealing my lunch at the rate of once a week on average.
I’ve considered spitting in my lunches and then resealing them, but once that seal is broken, how comfortable would I be eating them? The theiving bastard may just return the favor. I’d like to get some sort of nylon bag that I could put a lock on, just to make it a PITA for them to steal my stuff, and hope they’d move along. It couldn’t be bulky, since it’s a commmunal fridge, but it needs to be big enough to fit 5-10 Lean Cuisines, yet still not take up a lot of room when there is only one left.
I’ve seen bank bags, but they all seem to be thick and shaped, so they wouldn’t squish down much.
It might just be easier to bring one lunch every day in a lunchbox with a freezer pack in it and keep it at your desk. People are less likely to steal it, and you’re not taking up a good portion of the freezer with your food.
Other than that, the only suggestion I can make is that any bag with a zipper should be able to be modified to handle a padlock.
What about a mesh bag? They’re often found with canoeing and kayaking accessories. I don’t know of any that are designed to be locked, but it wouldn’t be too difficult to run a small cable and luggage lock near the opening. Something like this .
That might just do it. And, I happen to have a gift certificate to REI. I don’t need Fort Knox, just something to make the fucker decide it’s be easier to steal someone else’s.
Hi, NurseCarmen. I’ve been enjoying your posts for years. I hate topics like this, because the theft is the second tragedy, the first being whatever situation makes theft from a co-worker, and perhaps a friend, seem like the best of many possibilities. In a situation like this, there is usually a sporadic attempt to make amends. Are there never unexplained frozen dinners left in the freezer, things left on your desk, odd moments when someone is being nicer to you than the situation strictly warrants? I suppose not: you’ve been trained to notice things, and you’d have mentioned it.
If you want to know who’s taking the food, start bringing empty (resealed) boxes to put in the freezer, and watch to see who’s looking at you funny. If you want to be mean about it, empty an ounce of food coloring (it doesn’t wash off quickly) into the box before you glue it shut. The waxed cardboard will hold it until your antagonist gets his/her hands on it.
Here’s the question: is there anyone at work you would be sad to find is the culprit? Anyone at all? If there is any person there whom you would not be happy to expose as a sneak and a thief, for God’s sake, do not proceed further. It will not be worth it. I caught a friend in a lie, once, and needlessly called him on it. I’d be just as smart, and mayhap a little wiser, had I left matters alone.
Would you stop bringing the one with the chicken breast and mushroom pasta? It’s really not the best Lean Cuisine offering and the mushrooms make my throat swell shut.
I solved it this way. Insult him/her, but in a way that makes him feel small rather than belligerant. Things like “Hands off, creep” are like throwing down the gauntlet. But I put a note inside: “This is not yours. Yet you take it anyway. Are you aged ten??”
It’s funny you mention that. This week, the two co-workers that would bum me out the most are out of town. And the theif’s favorite (and alas, mine as well) meal, the Deluxe Baked Potato, went missing. But even if there was more than one thief, and one was one or both of them, I still would rather know. Just so I could place my opinions of that or those people in the right place.
I’ve always suspected Ino. Mostly because I always spell lno wrong, but partly because he works in a building with a giant ashtray on top. Mother always told me to stay away from people who work under giant ashtrays.
When I was in college, everyone in my program had their own computer, but there were always some assholes who would use other people’s computers to play games, etc. if the person wasn’t there. These were old iMacs that weren’t already password protected, so anyone and their mother could log on. I downloaded a freeware password protection program for it. When booted up, it would ask for the password. If some jerk tried to guess it (which happened a few times), the computer would scream, “Alert! Alert!” over and over again until the proper password was provided or the computer turned off. That put an end to the unauthorized usage for me, anyway…
GO TO YOUR BOSS. We had a problem like this at one large company I worked for, and the perp was fired. I think its reasonable to expect a degree of security while you’re at work. Someone else might be having the same problem. Does the perp leave the box in the garbage? I wonder if an after-hours sweep would produce the evidence.
That’s not an ashtray, it’s a UFO! Just not actively engaging in the F portion.
I have a Futurama lunchbox myself, and so far, nothing has been stolen out of it, though items I’ve left in the fridge without the lunchbox often were stolen. I once left a note about a stupid Slimfast someone took, saying I hoped they’d gain 10 pounds. Good times I had there. Good times.
