I remember the song well: when I was a kid, my family had an album by Ronnie Drew and the Dubliners (yes, an Irish group), who sang that song… but prefaced it by saying, “We’re only allowed to sing 5 of them.” PResumably there are 2 more verses that got a little too dirty for the censors in the 60s. You already wrote the first verse correctly (though in the version I’d heard, it was “cow” rather than sow). The rest, as I recall, were:
And when I came home on Tuesday night,
As drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a coat upon the floor,
Where my own coat should be.
So, I called my wife and I said to her,
“Would you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that coat upon the floor,
Where my own coat should be?”
She said, “You’re drunk, you’re drunk,
you silly old fool.
Still you cannot see!
That’s a lovely blanket that me mother gave to me.”
Sure, it’s many a day I’ve travelled
A hundred miles or more.
But buttons on a blanket, sure, I never saw before.
And when I came home on Wednesday night,
As drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a pipe upon the chair,
Where my own pipe should be.
So, I called my wife and I said to her,
“Would you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that pipe upon the chair,
Where my own pipe should be?”
She said, “You’re drunk, you’re drunk,
You silly old fool.
Still you cannot see!
That’s a lovely tin whistle that me mother gave to me.”
Sure, it’s many a day I’ve travelled
A hundred miles or more.
But tobacco in a tin whistle,
Sure, I never saw before."
And when I came home on Thursday night,
As drunk as drunk could be.
I saw two boots beside the bed,
Where my own boots should be.
So, I called my wife and I said to her,
“Would you kindly tell to me,
Who owns those boots beside the bed,
Where my own boots should be?”
She said, “You’re drunk, you’re drunk,
You silly old fool.
Still, you cannot see!
That’s a lovely dog
That my mother gave to me.”
Sure, it’s many a day I’ve travelled
A hundred miles or more.
But laces on a dog, sure, I never saw before.
And when I came home on Friday night,
As drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a head upon my bed,
Where my own head should be.
So, I looked at my wife, and I said to her,
“Would you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that head with you in bed,
Where my poor head should be?”
She said, “You’re drunk, you’re drunk,
You silly old fool.
Still you cannot see!
That’s a lovely baby that my mother gave to me.”
Sure, it’s many a day I’ve travelled
A hundred miles or more.
But whiskers on a baby, sure, I never saw before."
Obviously, the narrator is too drunk and stupid to catch on that his wife is screwing around on him while he’s out drinking. The funny thing is, when I was a little kid, I was ALWAYS listening to old Irish drinking songs like this, and sang all the songs, not having any real idea what they were about! I recall that, when I was 7, I got to sing at a backyard “Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystophy PArty” (remember those?), and I sang the Irish drinking song “The Black Velvet Band”- a song about a prostitute who plies some poor guy with liquor, frame him for theft, and get him shipped to prison in Australia!
Geez, and my parents were worried about ROCK lyrics!