Married last October and I’m in the process of changing my last name to his. I guess I’m just old-fashioned that way. Hyphenated names just seem a bit pretentious to the both of us (no offence intended to those who choose to do so).
AFAIK, only one of our friends chose to keep her maiden name when she got married; none are hyphenated.
I asked my intended he would like me to take his name, and was told, ‘If you want to.’
I asked my intended if he would take my name; he said, ‘No way.’
So I hyphenated my parents’ names, and all my associates calls him Mr. MyFathersName; it doesn’t bother him at all.
Well I kept all my names and took his, but did not hyphenate. The reason I did it was a little strange though <G>. My name was Rachel Christine H…, and my hubby’s last name started with an L. That means that my first name is Rachel and my initials are RCHL!!! Most things don’t include the H, since their often isn’t enough space for two middle names, and I love my middle name (my maiden name isn’t all that, um, pretty). Anything that I can fit all four names on though, get them. I almost always initial things in full as well.
The rule is that you can only use Mrs. with your married name. If you were Mrs. Archergal and he was Mr. Robert, people would think he was running around with Mr. Archergal’s wife, or at least that you had divorced Mr. Archergal and then decided to keep his name (like Dorothy Parker) when you remarried (which, with Mrs., is really more confusing than it’s worth).
That’s one of the reasons Ms. is so very useful – keeping your own name. For a married woman, Miss Maidenname is confusing and Mrs. Maidenname is just wrong – but Ms. Maidenname is completely unobjectionable.
(Actually, the real rule is that if you use Mrs. with your full name, you have to use your husband’s first name - Mrs. John Smith - but practically nobody does that anymore.)
Or you could just go back to school and get a doctorate, or get yourself ordained or elected to public office. 
(For clarity’s sake, occasionally you hear of various ‘rules’ about widows ‘having’ to change their names after their husbands die. All of them are wrong. A widow may continue using whatever name she used in marriage, unchanged, as long as she likes.)
I still have the same name that was on my birth certificate. Although I thought seriously about hyphenating, I never even considered ditching any part of my name in favor of his. I like my name. I like the way it flows when said aloud. I like the way it looks written out. I like what my names mean. I like having had something since the day I was born. My parents didn’t spend hours and hours finding a first and middle name that went with his last name. Besides, my inner third-grader balked at the idea of my initials being TP.
Hyphenating was an option, but it just didn’t really appeal to me. I would still have had to go through all the hassle of changing my paperwork in five million and twelve places, we still wouldn’t have had the same last name (which is the only reason I could think of to change it at all), and ultimately, it didn’t matter a tinker’s dam to either of us if we shared any part of a name or not. If he’d been really invested in my having his name or would have hyphenated his, I would have gone on and done it. As it was, though, it just seemed like a whole lot more hassle than it was worth. It wouldn’t have made us feel like a “real” family, or “more married” or any of the other reasons I see people give for changing their names, and neither of us gives a crap about tradition, so there just wasn’t much point, really.
I took a ton of flak over it, though. Friends, strangers, family, you name it. My mother told me it wasn’t like I had a career where I was known by my name; she could see the point of keeping my name if I’d gotten into vet school or something. Gee, thanks, Mom. Care for some lemon juice rub into the wound along with that salt? I was told that it would be unnecessarily difficult for our children (we’re not having any), that nobody would know we were married (anybody who wanted or needed to know would only have to ask), that Dr.J would be unhappy if I didn’t change my name, that it was silly and egotistical and childish of me, etc. A handful of people still refuse to address mail to my name, preferring to send things to some fictional person with my first name and his last name. Makes for a great screener, though. People who want to speak with Mr. Catlady or Mrs. J get a prompt hangup.
Kept our own names, of course. Why would I choose to trade my weird and wonderful surname for one that’s about as common as dirt?
Personally I think fbmf’s first name goes very well with my surname, but he wasn’t interested in changing, either. When our first kid was born, I said that I thought the first name we’d chosen for him just didn’t fit with my surname - too much alliteration! So we gave him my surname for a middle name, and his father’s surname for a last name.
I took on lno’s last name, and moved my maiden name into the “middle name” spot.
Hyphenating would have looked ridiculous - my first name IS hyphenated already, so that would have been a double hyphen whammie!
I do, however, now have the most unpronounceable name in the midwest!
E.
Kept mine, hubby doesn’t like it much but it’s a lot of forms and money to change it and I’ve always had it so I’m kinda used to it. Plus I’m the last in the family to have it -don’t know why that seems so important to me however it is.
I know someone who did that. In her case, her maiden name was something Polish with numerous consonants and one vowel (only half-kidding here). Her ex’s name was a much simpler Italian name, pronounced the way it was spelled, so she kept it, even though he was a major jerk.
At whatever point I get married, I’ll likely use Firstname Maiden Marriedname professionally, but apart from that I will likely just use his name.
I did not change my last name; MrWhatsit changed his last name to mine. He now has four names, because he just made his original last name his second middle name. So instead of being (example only; not MrWhatsit’s real name) Joe Bob Davis, he’s now Joe Bob Davis Smith.
Kept my name. It was never an issue and no one in the family (except, strangely, my brother) cares. My last name is Italian and his is Indian; hyphenation was never a consideration.
Our kids can have his last name; it only matters to me that the kids all have the same last name as each other.
I don’t care if people call me Mrs. Marriedname, unless it is someone whom I have already told that I am still Ms. Maidenname. Then it makes me think they are thougtless. But it’s not a huge deal.
Kept mine, too. I didn’t have any huge objections to taking his, it was more a practical thing. I’m used to it, every one else is used to it, less papers to fill out, etc. Plus he didn’t care. If he did, I would have changed it.
Taking his name would have given me the same name as someone who, while not objectionable unto herself, I’d just rather not have brought up every time I tell someone my name.
Our names hypenated sounded uber-lame.
I have a feeling that eventually I will need to add his name because people call or writing documents and checks to us (boo hoo, poor us) with his name and banks aren’t keen on that sort of thing.
Since Susanann asked, Dorothy Parker kept that name after she divorced her first husband, because she disliked her maiden name (Rothschild – not the famous ones).
That’s what I did, too.
I kept my name for many reasons: too much paperwork involved in changing it; I’ve grown quite attached to it (my signature looks great!); my first name kind of rhymes with his surname and it just sounds too cute; and I couldn’t think of a convincing reason to change it.
Both names are difficult to spell so hyphenation would be out of the question - although now, if I am required to give both of our full names, I have to spell all four of them out )(27 letters!) - I guess if I took his I’d only have to spell three? Still not a convincing enough reason.
When I go to his home country people will most likely call me Mrs Hisname and I won’t object too strenuously, but in Canada I’d prefer to stick with my own name.
Future kids will probably get mine as a middle name.
I have a unique last name (we’re the only family with it in our area, I’ve looked), and I come from a loving family. To me, the last name reflects on your family, so my name is special to me. My cousin’s husband took her last name. His father had abandoned him, and he felt no need to keep that man’s name. I really like the thought process behind that.